The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: The Prosecutors Strike Back
by wonderdude23
Summary: After the events of The Cool Power Prosecutors, Edgeworth, Godot, Blackquill, and Payne go on another suspenseful adventure filled with romance, suspense, love, and crime as they face new and old foes alike. WARNING - THIS HAS OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE AND SEXUAL SCENES. DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE THAT STUFF.
1. Return of the Prosecutors

Yo, it s ya boi wonderdude23 here. Its been 3 yeers but im still going strong mah homiez. im gonna finish theese fics for you guys.

Ive improved my riting style sins then so youre going to notice a qwality improvement sinse tehn.

The cool power prosekutors 2 part 1 payne dies Wehn edgeworth got back to the ghetto wit blackquill, gotot, and payne, he started to smoke some weed. 420 blaze it said edgewrtoh.

Nigga I need a coke break said african american-quill. Then pain looked at his fine, juicy samurai ass and licked his lpis.

Payne raped blackquills ass real hard. Edgworth was too busy going to the strip club to notice.

WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKING NIGGER!? GET YOUR FUCKING DICK OUT OF MY ASS YOU MOTHERFUCKING JEW ASS FAGOT!

Said niggerquill. Payne cumed in blackquills s ass and pulld his pants up. Blacqquill ran away like a bitch ass nigger.

Menwhile edgeworth was throwing money at some whores at the kkklub. He snorted some cocaine and 690 blaxed some kush.

But tehn godot came, ha hah, came into the kkklub and told edgeworth waht hapent. OH MAH FUCKING GOD EDGEWORTH!

the fuck you want said eggworth. im too busy fucking whores and blazing dope.

OH MY GOD NIGGER BLACKQUILL WAS FUCKING RAPED BY THAT FAGGOT PAYNE! Said godot as he was panicking to edgeworth.

Jesus calm down faggot speak slowly and don t be such a nigger godot. Said edgyworth.

LOOK YOU FUCKING JEW THAT FAGGOT WAS RAPED! GET THE FUCK OVER HERE SO WE CAN CALL THE FUCKING COPS!

fine nigger said edgeworth. He called the cops to come to the gehto.

Meanwhile dark skinned-quill was bleeding from his ass from getting raped. Reddy for round 2 said payne. Payne shot him.

The shot incapaticated cuntquill and he fell to the floor. Payne got his tiny dick out and started to rape him again.

As he started to rape blackuqipll the cops whowed up and pointed their guns at pain.

GET ON THE FUCKING FLOOR! I SAID GET ON THE FLOOR! Said the cops. Payne was too busy raping blaxkcuill to notice them.

The cops shot payne three times in the dick. Payhne went to the floor and the cops shot him in the head.

WAIT IT S THE FUCKING CRIMINALS! Said the leader of the cops. Who turned out to be MOTHERFUCKING FULBRIGHT, THAT FUCKING NIGGER!

Oh fuck said niggerquill who recognizdd Fulbright.

YOURE WANTED FOR KILLING PEOPLE, DISRUPTING THE PEACE, AND BRIBING OFFICIALS WITH DRUGS! Said bullfright.

Shit said blackquill who tried to run away. The shots on his legs started to get infected and he screamed.

OH HOLY SHIT IM FUCKING DYING OVER HERE! FUCK! Said blackquill. The cops arrested him and took him to the court hospital.

Where theres smoke theres fire said one of the copz. Youre right said another cop and they looked for the other prosekutors.

They went to the strup kkklub. There they saw naked chicks dancing on poles and fapped to dat hot ass shit. Hey edgeworth tehres the cops. Said godot.

Oh shit the cops I shouldn t have called those fags theyre gonna arrest us said edgeworth.

Well they seem to be distracted said godot. I have an idea. Said edgeworth. What is it said godot.

We can disguise ourselves so the cops dont catch our asses. Said edgeworth.

How in the holy mother of jew are we going to get fucking disguises said godot. I have an idea said edgeworth.

We can go into the bathroom, sneak up on some naked chicks, rape them and then murder them,

Then we can rip open their corpses, skin their corpses, and wear their skins as a disguise. we ll have flawless human disguises in no time.

Dude. That s a fucking genius idea nigga. why don t I think of these fucking genius 200 iq plays said godot.

It might leave a mess said edgeworth. it shouldn t be hard to clean there are ppaer towels in the bathrooms said godot.

Your right said edgwroth. While the cops were distracted the two snuk into the girlz bathroom and waited for some victims.

One girl came in and edgeworth saw who it was. It was athena. HOLY SHIT said edgeworth who was trying to wisper.

Oh my god shes so hot said godot. He started to fap to her. Keep it in your pants said edgeworth were going to rape her soon.

As she was leaving the stall edgeworth ambushd her and said you ready for round whatever athena?

OH GOD WHY EDGEWORTH WHY ARE YOU FUCKING FOLLOWING ME HERE YOU PERVERTED ASS FAGGOT!? Said athena.

Im here too you guys always forget about me said godot. Shut up godot said edgeworth. Nobody cares about you you fucking nigger.

GET THE FUCK AWAY! RAPE! RAPE! Athena screamed as edgeworth grabbed her ass and ripped her cloths off.

Edgeworth and godot started raping athena really hard and locked the door with super glue so nobody would get in.

Damn this is fucking hot as balls I don t know why this whores here but I love fucking her ass like fucking donkey kong nigga. Said edgeworth.

Dude this bitch s hot as shit look at dat fucking meaty ass cunt. My twelve inch dick is fucking ravaging this shit sed godot.

OH MY GOD STOP! PLEASE! WHATEVER YOU DO DONT FUCKING RAPE ME ANYMORE! I CANT FUCKING HANDLE IT! Said athena the bitch.

Oh were just getting started said edgwroth. Godot get the knife. THE KNIFE!? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!? Said Athena.

I got the knife said godot. He slashed athena s face. Blood got on the ground and all over the three as they kept fucking.

Oh my god youre so hot when your face is cut in half said edgeworth. Edgeworth and godot started nutting in her ass and cunt.

They kept fucking with their limp dicks as godot kept slashing athena with the knife and she was screaming like a bitch the wholet ime.

First it was the face then the tits and cunt then her hips and ass and then her entire body was slashed and dripping blood.

Then godot stabbed her in the eyes and stomach and Athena stopped screaming because she was dead.

Oh shit shes so much hotter when shes dead said godot as they kept fucking her.

They kept fucking her for a couple hours with their entire bodies covered in blood and cum.

Oh shit this is so fucking hot said godot. Wait godot remember our goal. We need to get this whore into a skin so we can wear her.

Oh right said godot. Lets skin her with our knives. They started to peel her skin off until the whole thing came off.

They hung her innards and shit on the wall and nailed them down. The blood was dripping in blood, they used paper towels to cleen it up.

Then they waited for another hot chick to come by. Another one showd up and they raped her and skinned her again.

The bodies were dressed up with paper towel to look like mannekins and disguised into the bathroom seenery.

Edgeworth and godot dressed up in the skins to look like hot chicks. Oh my god look at us we look like hot chicks.

Damn id fuck myself so damn hard said godot as he checked his hot body in the mirror. Dude we got our disguises said edgeworth.

As they left the bathroom nobody bated an eye. Tehn one of the cops who was still at the kkklub saw the two.

HEY GET OVER HERE! Said the cop. Oh shit said the two girls. They went over to the cop and were very nervos since they were about to get caught.

YOURE UNDER ARREST! Said the cop. Oh shit it wasn t us it was some other guy said the two as they were trying to cover themselfs up.

Let me finish said the cop. Youre under arrest for being too damn sexy. The cop said as he was about to bang the girls.

Uh lets get out of here before this fag starts to rape us said edgeworth. Good idea said gotot. They ran away from the kop. GET OVER HERE! Said the cop.

The cop caught up to them. Wait why are you covered in blood said the cop. Uh its cherry kool aid said edgeworth. Seems legit said the cop.

They ran out of the strip club away from the cop. Their bodies driped blood. GET OVER HEERE SO I CAN FUCK YOU said the cop.

They ran away and hid in a hospital. The cop never found them and went back to the station. Oh my god we got away said godot.

That was a close one said edgeworth. And while were here lets kill some jews and nigger patients. They started to search the place.

They got out assault rifels and started shooting up the place. When they got into another room they found niggerquill.

Oh nigga is that you said edgeworth. Damn you bitches are hawt if I wasn t in this damn fucking bed Id go ape on you hoes. Said blackquill.

The koolaid really adds a nice sex factor, really brings the sexy shine on your hot tits. I just want to ravage those asses with my 8.5 inch penis. Said blackquill.

Dude I think our disguises are working a little to well said godot. They took off their skins and blackquill was disgsuted.

Ew why are you fags dressing up as bitches said blackquill. That s so gay fucking fags. We can explain it s a long story said the two.

Whatever, jesus what took you fags so long my legs been shot said blackquill. I didn t know your ass was here said godot.

Waht happened said edgewoth. Heres what happened. I was minding my own business and was raped by payne you already know that. Said blackquill.

When all of a suden the cops showed up! They murderd pain who was minding his own business and sent mah ass here.

Don t know what hepend after that said African American quill. Oh shit said edgeworth that s serious I didn t know the cops already caught you.

Dude we gotta break yo ass outta here nigga. Said godot. He pulled the iv tube thingys out of the machine and broke blackquill out.

Nigga I got to get a wheelchair or something siaid niggerquill. They brot out a wheelchair and blackquill sat on its ass.

They dragged blacquill out of the hopsital and stole a car. They drove the car, killing any niggers and jews they found in the way.

Then they snorted some cocaine they found and got high. They got to the prosekuters office where edgeworth was.

Man we gotta get secret identities so the cops don t catch us said edgeworth. What identitties hah hah I said titties said godot.

We gotts get some identities stop being so immature said blackquill. They figured out some identitires but they won t show up until next chapter.

Menwhiel in the write law have you seen athena said phoenix. I sent her to the ghetto to get some porn. Said Apollo. Dude I told you this already said phoenix.

Don t send athena to the ghetto where the niggers will rape her. Shes probably getting her ass stuffed with black cocks right now. Bitch. Said phoenix.

Weve been over this time and time again. Said phonesx. Dude i cant have her ass being raped by black cocks she needs to keep the bllodline pure said Apollo.

Ur right for once phoenix. We need to get her back from the ghetto. Said Apollo.

TO BE CONTINUDE heh heh I said nude IN PART 2!


	2. F The Police

The cool power prosekutors 2 part 2

Edgeworth was tied up as gumshoe walked over to him naked with a whip. His dick was hard and cum started to drip from it.

Hey edgeworth said gumshow with a sexual look on his face. Edgeworth tried to talk but his face was taped down.

Gumshoe pulled out a dildo for edgeworth. Imma fuck your ass real good nigga said gumshoe. Gumshoe walked closer with his dick.

Edgeworth looked over to the other prosekuters who were tied up too, ready to get anal fucked.

That was three days later how did edgeworth get into this situation? find out here!

As soon as edgeworth got home he 420 blazed some kush. Godot and niggerquill did the same.

Oh shit this blow hits the fucking spot said godot as he snorted some coke. They were so high they ran otside and started raping little girls.

When they were dune they pulled their pants up. Nigga said edgeworth why does our lives have to fucking suck so goddamn fucking much.

I know right dude we do fucking nothing to deserve it said blackquill. Right as that was happening a black nigger walked past edgeworth.

It had some fried chicken in a watermelon container. Oh shit its a nigger said gogodt. Where said edgeworth. Over there said blackquill.

OH SHIT NIGGGA said the nigger as it tried to escape. Edgewroth got out an assault rifle and shot the nigger down. that's how the hood be nigga said godot.

But tehn as the nigger died it flashed a gang symbol. Gang gang dawg said the nigger before it died.

Edgeworth godot and blackquill went to where the nigger died. Nigga we can get some good shit off this black ass fag said negroquill.

I aint gonna steal no more nigger shit said edgeworth. As soon as edgewroth said that two shadows crept up on them. One of them started humping godots ass.

OH SHIT said godot. Godot started sweating since he thought it was kinda hot. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! Said edgeworth.

What a fag said blackquill. Dudd we gotta get this nigger off gogot said edgeworth. Blackquill started to get out his samurai sword.

He cut into the shadow guys face. The shadow guys mask came off. It was spongebob! Wait WHATTTTTTTTTTTT said blackquilll.

Bahahahahahahahah im ready im ready said spongebob as he kept humping godot. GOD DAMN IT SPONGEBOB! Said the second shadow guy.

The second shadow guy took of his mask. IT WAS SQUIDWARD! Squidward pulled out a gun and shot spongebob in the ass.

YOU WANNT FIGHT NIGGA!? WANNA THROW HANDS NIGGA!? Said pongespob. Spongebob and squidward started to kick each others asses.

Spongebob got some black cocks and started to rape squidward but squidward ripped spongebobs face off. It was another mask!

Underneath the mask was APOLLO! Wait WHATTTTTTTT said everyone except squidward and Apollo. I told you to stop being a fag said squidqard.

Dude what the fuck is even going on spongebob was Apollo and whose squidward said edgeworth. I dunno whats going on this is really gay said blackquill.

Niggga I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for those meddling kids and whatever said appollo. Wait if spongebob is Apollo whose squidward.

Said edgeworht. Squidward took off his mask. IT WAS PHOENIX! Phoenix was so mad that he pulled out a sniper rifle.

YOU KNOW WHT APOLLO!? IM SO FUCKING SICK OF YOUR FUCKING SHIT! IM GONNA KILL YOU YOU FUCKING STUPID ASS NIGGER! Said phenix.

Phoenix started shooting at Apollo. Apollow started to run the fuck away. FUCK YOU PHEONIEX YOU STUPID ASS JEW FAG. Said Apollo.

Apollo hid in a wall but phoenix found his ass and started sjooting. Apolo ran into a school and phoenx started shooting it up.

There were sum niggers in the class and Jews so phoenix noticed it. Lets kill some niggers said phoenix. Oh shit said the niggers.

Phoneix started geting his assault rifle and shooting up the school. lets get in on some of that action said edgewirth.

Edgeworth went into the cafeteria and shot up some students singing the pumped up kiks song. Gotod did as well.

Nigga lets kill some people nigga said godot. Already on it saia edgeworth. The cops showed up in five seconds.

OH SHIT said everyone. They wnet out of the sckool and started facing the cops. It was like gta v when you have three stars.

Helociptrs shooted them and cops shot with assault rifels and tons of police cars and shit.

NIGGER WHAT THE FUCK said phoenix gotod Apollo and edgeworth. They got into a helicopter and flew off.

Look out said edgeworth as the copter went to the police station. The copter swervd and they jumped out of it.

The kopter crashed into the police station! Edgeworth godot and blackquill got out of the station and the cops caught them!

FREEZE MOTHERFUCKERS! said gumshoe and fullbright who teemed up again. OH SHIT said edgeworth godot and blackquill.

Tehy ran away like motherfucking usain bolt except theyre white and have privilege. GET THE FUCK BACK HERE YOU FUCKERS! said the cops.

They shot cops and threw grenades and shit. Dude I know what to do in this situation said blackquill. What said gotot.

Blackquill got google maps and showed them the secret tank bunker they bought with their money back in cool power prosecuters one.

Oh right we bought that said edgeworth. Lets get the tank. They stole a car from a hot girl and raped her too.

They drove to the tank bunker, shooting niggers and Jews they found along the way until they got there.

BUT COPS WERE GUARDING THE DOOR! oh shit what do we do said edgeworth. Uh godot use your coffee attack again said blackquill.

Godot got his coffee mug out again. Fuck these fucking nigger faggots he said as he was about to throw the cup.

But the cops shot the cup and it broke into shards scaring him like when your pickaxe breaks in minecraft.

OH SHIT said godot.

The other two kept shooting the cops until Edgeworth put his gun down and used kung fu and ninjitsu and stuff to kill them with his bare hands.

Im a ninja master said edgeworth. They got into the tank bunker.

There was a guy at the front door who looked like patrick if patrick was human. So really ugly.

It took its dick out and tried to rape the three musketeers. GET THE FUCK OFF ME said Godot. They ran into the bunker further and further.

The ugly guy kept trying to rape them until it got ahold of blackquill. NOT AGAIN WITH THESE FAGS said blackquill.

Blackquill was raped again by another faggot, this time edgeworth and godot watched the whole thing.

Then fullbright came up behind them not in that way you fucking perverts and scared the two.

Oh. Shit. said edgeworth as they were caught. You fell right into my trap said fullbright.

After the ugly guy was done raping blackquill he took off his mask. Nice work Gumshoe said fullbright. It was GUMSHOE!

The two tied up edgeworth blackquill and godot. They were knocked out for three days.

What the three didnt know was that gumshoe had stolen the tank bunker and converted it into a gay sex dungeon.

After edgeworth woke up gumshoe was there. He smiled sexualy and walked over to edgeworth.

Edgeworth was tied up as gumshoe walked over to him naked with a whip. His dick was hard and cum started to drip from it.

Hey edgeworth said gumshow with a sexual look on his face. Edgeworth tried to talk but his face was taped down.

Gumshoe pulled out a dildo for edgeworth. Imma fuck your ass real good nigga said gumshoe. Gumshoe walked closer with his dick.

Edgeworth looked over to the other prosekuters who were tied up too, ready to get anal fucked.

Gumshoe walked up to edgeworth and took the tape off. WHAT THE FUCK GUMSHOE THE FUCK YOURE DOING TO ME said edgeworth.

Oh i was just going to fuck you with this dildo real good and then ill fuck you with my actual dick said gumshow.

YOU FUCKING FAGGOT NIGGER JEW RETARD FAGGOT! said edgeworth. he looked over and saw apollo! WHAT THE FUCK APOLLOS HERE said edgeworth.

edgeworth was silenced by a dildo to the mouth as Gumshoe started fucing him.

Then fullbright came out also naked and put a ball gag on apollo. Apollo was naked and had his dick out. Fullbright fapped to it.

Im gonna fuck you real good said fulbright as he took some viagra and his dick got big.

Wait how did apollo get here said godot who just woke up.

Well it turns out that APOLLO WAS KIDNAPPED BY GUMSHOE AND FULBRIGHT!

Three days ago, edgeworth and the gang ran away from phoenix and apollo. After the helicopter crashed, phoenix and apollo kept chasing each other.

GET THE FUCK BACK HERE SO I CAN FUCKING MURDER YOUR ASS said phoenix with his gun. OH SHIT said apolo.

They kept running and running until they found a drug dealer. Oh shit I gotta get some of dat green stuff said Apollo.

While apollo was distracted buying weed, Phoenix got the perfect opportunity to go king kong on his ass. He aimed his gun at apollo.

But as he was about to shoot the COPS CAME BY! LED BY FULBRIGHT! fulbright said GET THE FUCK ON THE FLOOR! I SAID GET THE FUCK DOWN!

The drug dealer was shot to death and apollo was threatened. Phonics saw the arrest and the cops saw him.

Hey you nigger! You want to save this fucking faggot retard jew said fulbright. no said phoenix.

Okay if you dont save him well take him to our sex dungeon and rape him for days. said fullright. DONT DO IT said apollo. THATS FUCKING GAY!

I dont give a shit take that faggot to the dungeon and rape his ass said Phoenix. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS said apollo.

PHOENIX YOU STUPID ASS NIGGER FAGGOT JEW RETARD FAG said apollo as he was dragged off.

You must be real proud of what you did said fullbright. Yeah said phoenix you better rape him hard since I fucking hate his faggot ass.

Damn i want that sexy white boy booty said fullbright i bet his dick is long hard sexy and cums all over my face.

Whatever you fucking faggot nigger said phoenix as he started to smoke some weed.

Fullbright took apollo to the sex dungeon after that and knocked the prosecuters out.

So thats how it happened said fullbright before he started to rape apollo. NO FUCK YOU PHOENIX said apollo through his gag.

OH SHIT said godot and blackquill who also woke up as they realized what was about to happen.

Meanwhile, in the wright offices phoenix was doing drugs. He had some cocaine and mixed it with weed to smoke some meth.

Man nigga i got no niggas to fuck! FUCK! I need a hot bitch to stick my cock into! Wheres athena at when you need her said phoenix.

Oh right she was at the ghetto. Probably fucking niggers like always, slutty ass cunt said phoenix.

I guess i gotta save that bitch so she can suck white dick and keep the white master race pure said phoenix.

Otherwise I gotta throw their damn baby in the furnace with the other jews said phoenix. Phoenix drove out in his own tank.

As phoenix was going out edgeworth was getting raped by gumshoe's dildo and cock at the same time.

After gumshoe was done he turned his attention to blackquill. Ready for round 2 said gumshoe.

OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT said blackquill as gumshoe was about to rape him again like a fucking nigger.

Meanwhile fullbright was done with apollo and started raping godot. OH SHIT said godot. WHOSE THE FUCK GOING TO SAVE OUR ASSES!

To be continude in part 3.


	3. Phoenix Strikes Back

The cool power prosecutors 2 part 3: phoenix strikes back

Where the story last left off, edgeworth and the gang were getting raped by fullbright and gumshoe, also known as gayshoe.

Apollo was kidnapped too so phoenix had nobody left to shoot at. So phoenix went to the ghetto in his tank to fuck Athena. Not to rescue apollo, he's gay.

As phoenix was in his tank he blew up niggers and jews, which there were lots of because it was the ghetto.

Phoenix then came across a strip club called the Big Cock Rock where hot bitches showed their massive tits and asses.

Phoenix spent the next day there getting his rock on before looking for athena. He looked in the guys bathroom and saw guys having gay sex.

After killing him with his assault rifle phoenix went to the girls bathroom. He saw a couple of hot chicks and went to fuck them.

But when phoenix was done fucking the chicks, he realized that they were just two corpses wrapped in paper towels.

Damn that's even sexier than I thought said phoenix as phoenix continued to fuck the two rotten corpses. The maggots especially turned him on.

As phoenix continued to rape the corpses athena showed up to use the bathroom. She saw phoenix.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING PHOENIX YOU FUCKING PERVERT! said athena. Oh shit said phoenix. I can explain.

Athena started to stroke Phoenix's cock immediately. Phoenix got really hard. Athena stroked his cock so hard he nutted all over her face.

Oh Phoenix I'm gonna fuck you so fucking hard said athena. Phoenix was really horny and rock hard so he was ready to have hot sex.

Athena pulled her pants down, revealing her tiny ass wrinkly dick. Wow your dick is even bigger than mine said phoenix.

Wait WHAT THAT DOESNT MAKE ANY SENSE NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT WHY DO YOU HAVE A DICK said phoenix.

Athena said you ready to fuck lawyer boy? Phoenix pulled off athenas mask revealing WINSTON PAYNE!

WHAT THE FUCK PAYNE! said phoenix in shock and disbelief. I CAME ON YOUR GODDAMN FACE YOU FUCKING FAGGOT!

Dude lol that was so fucking funny you should have seen the look on your face! LOL LOL LOL! said payne.

I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU AND SLAUGHTER YOUR GODDAMN FAMILY PAYNE! GET THE FUCK BACK HERE! said phoenix.

Lol you gotta catch me first! said payne as he fucked off. IM GONNA KILL YOU YOU FUCKING NIGGER! said phoenix.

Phoenix got in his tank as payne got in his. They ran over cars, shooting niggers and jews they drove by.

Payne's bodyguards got into cars and started shooting at phoenix. Phoenix threw remote bombs in their cars and blew them up.

GET THE FUCK BACK HERE YOU FUCKING JEW said phoenix. Payne responded by flipping Phoenix off and shooting him.

Phoenix got a shot in the arm but kept driving. Fucking hell thats my fapping arm said phoenix.

Payne kept driving around the city in a loop and kept shooting jews and niggers. He stopped by a gay strip club along the way.

Phoenix went there too and saw payne fucking some guys in a massive gay orgy.

Wanna join in said payne as he thrusted towards phoenix. Phoenix got in his tank and drove to the strip club. GET BACK HERE SEXY said payne.

They kept chasing until they got to the strip club. Phoenix smoked some cocaine and drunk some meth.

Payne showed up behind him with bodyguards. Wanna fuck nigga said payne. I'd rather die you fucking faggot said phoenix.

Well I got you now said payne as he thrusted towards phoenix with his tiny dick. FUCK OFF! said phoenix as he slammed the wall and hit a button.

OH SHIT said payne. The floor collapsed and everyone fell down into the basement. WHAT THE FUCK said phoenix as he saw what was in there.

Phoenix didnt get the chance to say anything more before he was knocked out.

Meanwhile in the sex dungeon edgeworth and the gang were being raped by gumshoe and Fullbright.

At this point edgeworth could barely hold his shit in as his asshole was constantly stretched by gumshoe and other niggers that raped him.

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU FAGS BEING THIS FUCKING GAY said edgeworth to gumshoe.

Oh its real simple said gumshoe as he stroked the cummy dildo. It all started when the nazis flew planes into the twin towers.

After you faggots left me and fullbright began the investigation and stumbled on a lead. It was payne.

PAYNE YOU FUCKING NIGGER said blackquill as his mouth was fucked by a black cock.

Me and fullbright found payne and met in the bombed courtroom. We made a plan to get revenge on you gay ass prosecuters.

We wanted to kidnap you too so we could rape you and stuff your assholes with our cum. So we did. said fullbright.

PAYNE THAT MOTHERFUCKING JEW NIGGER FAGGOT RETARD CUNT FAGGOT said godot.

As we speak payne is in his headquarters but you'll never see that faggot again said gumshoe.

Meanwhile in paynes base phoenix was tied up. He saw payne there. Are you ready to get fucked homie. said payne.

FUCK YOU YOU STUPID ASS JEW NIGGER said phoenix. I raped you once i can rape you again said payne.

WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS FUCKING PLACE said phoenix. I'll show you, nigger said payne. Payne took phoenix out of the cell.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE said phoenix in disbelief.

There were a ton of girls being thrown into the furnaces, it was like the holocaust with the concentration camps.

WHAT THE FUCK PAYNE THIS IS FUCKING GAY! said phoenix. I have all the girls youve ever fucked in these cells. said payne.

SO YOU HAVE ATHENA said phoenix. Yeah said payne i have her stupid fucking ass.

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU THROWING GIRLS IN FURNACES LIKE FUCKING HITLER said phoenix.

Oh its real simple. Ive always had a grudge against edgeworth and the other prosecuters said payne. They always call me gay.

They always fuck bitches and make fun of me for having sex with men. I hate their straight asses. So I made a plan to get revenge on them.

I have them all tied up in my sex dungeon, getting fucked and raped by gumshoe and fullbright. But that wasn't enough.

I wanted all women to be eradicated from the city entirely so no fucking straights could ever wrong me again said payne.

THATS NO FUCKING EXCUSE TO COMMIT FUCKING GENOCIDE ON THEIR ASSES said phoenix.

Oh its too late now said payne you're going to have to pay the price.

Hey nigga these bitches fuck good. I like sticking my long hard dick in their tiny cunts and fucking their titties said gaspen.

Wait its gaspen payne, you're in on this too said phoenix. Yeah and i like to fuck his tiny little boy ass said payne.

You better not have been fucking the prisoners. Only lines can be straight around here said payne.

Yes daddy what do you want from me. said gaspen. I want you to rape and murder phoenix said payne.

Yes daddy said gaspen as he brought phoenix out. FUCK YOU PAYNE! LET ME GO YOU FUCKING NIGGER FAGGOT JEW said phoenix.

In the cell gaspen was standing in front of phoenix.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE YOU FUCKING NIGGER said phoenix. Look nigga I'm only pretending to be straight said gaspen.

My gay ass brother wants to kill all the sexy bitches said gaspen. Yeah i know that said phoenix.

Hes lying about the real reason why though. He has the prosecutors but he has a different plan to kill the bitches said gaspen.

Why the fuck is he killing these sexy ass hoes said phoenix. Oh its real simple said gaspen.

He doesn't want to kill women because he hates them said gaspen its because he wants to create a male only gay society!

Wait WHAT said phoenix. I know its really faggoty said gaspen. my brother thinks that killing the bitches makes having girl children impossible.

THAT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE MEN CANT EVEN FUCKING HAVE CHILDREN THAT FUCKING DUMBASS NIGGER PAYNE said phoenix.

I know its really dumb. Listen i was hoping for an outsider to come in here. I need your help to break the bitches out and kill payne said gaspen.

Whats in it for me are you going to rape me like your gay ass fucking nigger brother said phoenix.

If we kill payne you get all the hoes and bitches you want, even the bitches you used to fuck like athena and maya said gaspen.

OH HELL YES said phoenix. Then let me untie you up said gaspen.

After phoenix was freed the two of them came up with a plan. Alright so we're going to break out athena first so we have her help said gaspen.

Also so we can fuck her said phoenix. Then we're going to break the other bitches out and turn them on paynes bodyguards said gaspen.

While they're distracted we can go to the sex dungeon and break out the other prosecutors and have them kill payne said gaspen.

Seems legit said phoenix. you got some weed on you for me to smoke. Gaspen snorted some cocaine and phoenix took a blazing break.

The two of them broke out and started killing guards with knives. They found athena in her cell and broke her out. She was naked and damn hot.

EWW GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU FUCKING PERVERTED ASS PAYNE said athena.

No its gaspen payne not winston you stupid whore said gaspen. we're trying to FUCKING KILL payne dumbass bitch.

Damn athena the slashes on your face make you look sexier said phoenix. Where have you been all this time you fucking whore ass nigger.

I was in the fucking ghetto to get porn magazines for apollo again but i saw payne and he was trying to kidnap me said athena.

I ran but didnt see where i was going so i ran into a strip club. I gave my clothes to a random bitch at the club and hid said athena.

THEN I SAW FUCKING EDGEWORTH AND GODOT COME IN said athena.

The two went into the girls bathroom and then the slut with my clothes on went in. I hid for five more hours.

Then edgeworth and godot came out of the girls bathroom with bloody girl skins on and I was freaking the fuck out said athena.

The cops chased them out so I ran out to tell the cops but payne caught me and took me to his dungeon said athena.

Damn you're even sexier when you're telling your gay story said phoenix as he was fapping.

Look bitch we need you to fucking get the other bitches out of their cells and fucking distract paynes guards said gaspen.

Okay i can do that gaspen but you'll need to pay me said athena. NOT WITH SEX said athena as gaspen started to take his clothes off.

Gaspen gave athena $420,000 and athena helped them break chicks out. After the chicks were out the three ran towards the sex dungeon.

Where are we going said athena. To the sex dungeon to break the prosecuters out. EWW NOT THE PROSECUTORS said athena.

Look bitch if you're not going then I take the $420,000 back said gaspen. HELL NO said athena. Then fucking come with us said gaspen.

Meanwhile in the sex dungeon, gumshoe and fulbright were continuing to fuck edgeworth, godot, blackquill, and apollo.

What the fuck would payne want with us said edgeworth. Oh its real simple said fullbright.

You see paynes ultimate goal is to eliminate women from the entire planet so everyone has gay sex with each other said fullbright.

THATS FUCKING GAY said godot. Its fucking sexy is what it is said gumshoe before sticking his dick in godots mouth.

So then why would that fag want us here said blackquill. He wants to be able to do whatever he wants with you said gumshoe.

I never saw paynes gay faggot ass said edgeworth. Listen shut the fuck up so payne can repopulate the goddamn world with men.

That doesnt make any fucking sense if all the hot chicks are gone nobody can get pregnant said apollo. SHUT THE FUCK UP said fullbright.

PAYNES GOING TO FUCKING DELETE THE ENTIRE FUCKING HUMAN RACE TO HAVE GAY SEX THAT FUCKING FAGGOT NIGGER said edgeworth.

HOW ABOUT YOU SHUT THE FUCKING FUCK UP said gumshoe.

To be continued in chapter 4.


	4. The Escape

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 4: The Escape

Phoenix, Gaspen and Athena showed up with guns and shot down the niggers.

OH SHIT said the prosecuters. OH MY FUCKING GOD ITS A GIRL IM SO FUCKING TIRED OF GETTING FUCKED BY GAY ASS FAGGOTS said apollo.

GET THOSE FAGS said Gumshoe and fullbright. They shot at the three.

Phoenix got another shot in his fapping arm. FUCKING SHIT ASS FAGGOT RETARDED NIGGER CUNT FAGGOT said phoenix.

After they were all dead it was just Gumshoe and fullbright. The two were tied up and everyone was freed.

OH MY FUCKING GOD APOLLO HOW THE FUCK DID YOU END UP HERE said Athena. HOLY SHIT LET ME FUCK THAT HOT ASS FIRST said apollo.

Apollo raped Athena before she could say anything more and fucked that ass like fucking kraft mac and cheese.

WAIT IS THAT FUCKING PAYNE said edgeworth. No its Gaspen payne you fucking dumbass nigger said gaspen.

HOW IS PAYNE EVEN FUCKING ALIVE HE WAS KILLED BY THE MOTHERFUCKING NIGGER COPS said blackquill.

I'll explain later said gaspen to the prosecutors. Right now we need to GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! FUCKING GO! said gaspen. Okay fine said everybody.

The prosecutors, Gaspen, Phoenix, and Athena all ran towards the concentration camp's exit until Payne showed up with all of his guards!

GET THOSE FUCKING NIGGERS! said payne menacingly. OH SHIT said everybody else as they were shot at.

Phoenix, Athena, and Gaspen fought off Payne's other guards while the prosecutors fought Payne.

WHAT THE FUCK PAYNE I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD! said Edgeworth. Yeah you were killed by the fucking cops after raping blackquill! said Godot.

Oh, you faggots are fucking retarded! You SERIOUSLY THOUGHT I WOULD FUCKING DIE LIKE THAT? said payne. I'll FUCKING KILL YOU ALL!

Payne started shooting at the prosecutors. Godot got a shot to the head but his mask deflected it back at Payne.

Edgeworth kicked Payne right in the nuts. He winced in pain and shot Edgeworth in the dick. HOLY FUCKING SHIT HE SHOT MY DICK!

Desperate times call for desperate measures said Blackquill as he got out his samurai sword. He started slicing Payne's body parts to pieces.

Payne stole the sword and cut Blackquill's hand off. HOLY FUCKING SHIT HE GOT MY FUCKING HAND FUCKING CUT OFF! NIGGER!

Godot threw his coffee mug at Payne. Payne shot a bullet at the mug, causing the mug to be deflected back at Godot.

Godot used his quick thinking to launch another mug at the other mug, causing both mugs to be deflected back at Payne.

Payne got third degree burns from the fucking coffee! In rage he shot Gaspen in the arm! WAIT WHAT THE FUCK GASPEN YOU SHOT ME!

Gaspen got out his gun and shot Payne in the dick. Payne keeled over.

Any last words you fucking Jew ass niggerfaggot said Gaspen? Wait I'm confused DID HE JUST FUCKING SHOOT PAYNE said Edgeworth in surprise.

It's a simple explanation, Edgeworth said Gaspen. Gaspen aimed his gun at the prosecutors. YOU SERIOUSLY FELL FOR THAT SHIT?

You thought Payne was the true villain, but it was me, Gaspen Payne all along!

WHAT THE FUCK! said everybody at the same time. SO WINSTON PAYNE IS INNOCENT said phoenix.

He was just the decoy for my big operation to eliminate all bitches on earth. I sent him to capture Athena so she would join the cunts here.

I concocted a plan by using Gumshoe and Fulbright to rape and enslave the prosecutors so they won't be in my fucking way.

I knew you would fall for my plans, Wright. That is why I pretended to be straight and pretended to be against the death camps.

Now that you know my secret, I believe now is the perfect time to make my escape. SEE YOU IN HELL, FAGGOTS! said gaspen.

Gaspen made his escape through a jetpack through the ceiling. It was so badass that everybody was in awe for five minutes.

WHAT THE FUCK said everybody again. So Gaspen was the villain all along! said Edgeworth.

Payne got up with his dick shot wound. Nigga you alright bro said Blackquill. YOU FAGGOTS SHOT MY ASS! said payne to the prosecutors.

Yeah we FUCKING KNOW PAYNE! Stop being such a fucking nigger faggot said Godot. Dude I had a sexy badass idea said Edgeworth.

What if we restart the cool power prosecutors? Just the four of us fucking hoes and blazing dope. We'll fuck so much pussy and get cash said Edgeworth.

Yeah nigga that would KICK SO MUCH FUCKING ASS said Godot. Yuck pussy is disgusting said Payne. I like dicks better.

The four of them left for the ghetto to inject meth and kill faggots. The attorneys went to prosecute Payne next.

Athena and Phoenix got sick of the old Wright agency so they reconstructed the sex dungeon into a new base.

We should stock up on assault rifles, drugs, and weapons said Phoenix. Good idea said Athena in response to Phoenix.

Wait, what happened to Apollo? And Trucy, for that matter? said Phoenix. Who cares about those niggers said Athena as she blazed some cocaine.

While the two were combing out the sex dungeon for rotting corpses of rape victims, they came across a suspicious looking wall.

What the fuck is that thing said Athena. Phoenix felt around and pulled on a chain. The chain was hard to feel because it had cum and blood on it.

After the chain was pulled, the wall slowly was lifted down. WHAT THE FUCK said both Athena and Phoenix.

Phoenix shone a flashlight into the dark room, illuminating some rotting corpses that were stowed away in the closet.

What the motherfucking SHIT ASS FAGGOT JEW RETARD NIGGER WHY ARE THERE SO MANY FUCKING CORPSES HERE!? said Phoenix.

There were hundreds of dead corpses, all skinny and malnourished, drenched in cum. Many were dismembered with bones sticking out.

Blood coated all the walls and floors, drenching all the corpses. Brain matter and organs were strewn across the room like fucking Play-doh.

About a half inch of piss flooded the floors, bringing with it hunks of shit. Rats swarmed out and started gnawing at the attorneys's feet.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK said Athena. Those corpses were the victims of Gumshoe and Fulbright's sex dungeon.

Phoenix and Athena ran out of the building. WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GOING TO DO said the two. They called the cops.

Wait you TWO WERE AT THE CRIME SCENE! YOURE UNDER ARREST said the cops. OH SHIT said the attorneys.

Meanwhile in the ghetto, the prosecutors were killing black people and Jews. They drove in their tank and slaughtered faggots with AK-47s.

KILL THEM ALL said Godot. Blackquill injected some heroin and Godot snorted coffee grains. Edgeworth was driving.

Payne looked up on Google maps for a place to eat at. Oh fuck nigga here's a good place. The local Chuck E Cheeses said Payne.

Chuck E Cheeses is fucking DOPE, nigga! said Godot. That's 420 blazin' dawg said Blackquill. Edgeworth started driving towards Chuck Es.

While they were driving to Chuck E Cheeses, some niggers tried to shoot their tank down. They responded by nuking their hood ghetto.

TAKE THAT YOU FUCKING JEWS said Edgeworth as he blew their nigger asses up.

When they got to Chuck E Cheeses they got to the counter. Are you faggots going to exchange any tokens said the counter guy.

Fuck your fucking tokens said Payne as he killed the counter guy with an assault rifle. Payne and Godot broke into the prize area and stole prizes.

Edgeworth went up to the Chuck E mascot, the giant fucking rat. The rat was singing for some fucking girl's birthday.

You look like a fucking retard said Edgeworth. He drugged the rat's pizza, and the rat ate the pizza and passed out. FUCKING YES said Edgeworth.

Blackquill went up to the little girl and raped her ass. Then he shot the other kids and raped the dead girls's corpses and their moms's corpses.

He ate the rest of the pizza and then stole the other slices for himself. Godot and Payne came back with a fuckton of Chuck E prizes.

Edgeworth took the unconscious Chuck E and killed him. Then he took the suit and wore it. Edgeworth went up to some girls and started raping them.

The sight of Chuck E raping little girls traumatized the kids, whose throats were getting slit by the other prosecutors.

The prosecutors were so busy raping and killing little girls that they forgot to notice the TV turning on!

Phoenix Wright and Athena Cykes were arrested for torturing and murdering hundreds of people today said the news.

Wait WHAT THE FUCK said the prosecutors. We should have killed those people first damn it! said Godot as he smoked weed.

However, two faggots showed up behind the prosecutors! IT WAS FULBRIGHT AND GUMSHOE! WHAT THE FUCK! said all the prosecutors!

Fulbright and Gumshoe pointed assault rifles at the prosecutors. We have a little request for you niggers said the two.

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU RETARDS WANT said the prosecutors. We want you to prosecute the faggot attorneys said the former detectives.

Once you make those retards guilty WE'LL BE OFF THE FUCKING HOOK! WE KILLED THOSE FUCKING FAGGOTS! said Gumshoe.

Gumshoe and Fulbright led the prosecutors out at gunpoint with their squad of cops. They nuked the Chuck E Cheeses afterwards to hide evidence.

The two detectives had tied up the prosecutors and had them in the back of a van. They were driving out of the ghetto.

How the fuck did you two retard faggots escape the fucking COPS said Blackquill. Oh, it's real simple said Fulbright.

After we were tied up in the sex dungeon we knew that somebody would find the rotting corpse room where we put all the dead bodies.

So we let Phoenix and Athena discover the secret entrance by taking the wall decorations off.

Then we figured that we could get our revenge on you niggers by pinning the blame on them and having you prosecute them!

When you niggerfaggots weren't looking, me and Gumshoe escaped by shooting the rope tying us together. We escaped and plotted our revenge.

Fortunately for us, there were some cops there for us to team up with. We teamed up with the cops and killed some bitches and Jews.

Then we used radar triangulation and shit to find you niggers at the Chuck E Cheeses. Its that simple said Fulbright.

WHAT THE FUCK said Payne. YOU FUCKING RETARDS ARE FUCKING GAY! said Edgeworth. FUCK YOU STUPID NIGGERS! said Blackquill.

Shut the FUCK UP said Gumshoe. We have you niggers tied up, the courtroom is where you're headed! SHUT YOUR ASSES UP, FAGS!

Meanwhile, in the detention center, Athena and Phoenix were really pissed off from having been detained.

WHAT THE FUCK JUST FUCKING HAPPENED! THERE WERE FUCKING CORPSES AND SHIT said Athena. I know it was fucked up said Phoenix.

Shut the fuck up! You retarded ass niggers have a visitor said the guard! WHO THE FUCK COULD IT POSSIBLY BE said the two.

As the visitor came up the two recognized exactly who it was! ITS YOU said the two!

To be continued in the Cool Power Prosecutors 2 chapter 5: the Trial!


	5. The Trial: Part 1

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 5: The Trial: Part 1

Apollo had arrived late at night to the Wright Anything agency. He was tired from getting raped so much by Gumshoe and Fulbright.

Apollo got out a flashlight and lit up the area. It was dark and scary. Who the fuck is there said Apollo.

He got out his assault rifle and walked slowly to his room. The power was out so he couldn't turn on the lights.

Apollo was ready to shoot any faggot that walked in his path. Any fucking nigger. He went to his room, creeping slowly.

In his room, there were a lot of sex toys for him to stick his massive cock into. He opened up Chrome and loaded up an incognito tab.

As Apollo was fapping to 8 year girl porn, the shadow crept closer to his sexy red jacketed ass. It pulled out a knife and attacked him!

OH HOLY FUCKING SHIT said Apollo. He tried to fight back with his rifle and shot the attacker, but the attacker used their knife to

deflect the shots from Apollo's gun. One shot was deflected into his leg. FUCK FUCKING SHIT NIGGER FAGGOT screamed Apollo.

Apollo grabbed his sex toys and hit the attacker on the head with them.

STOP HITTING ME APOLLO said the attacker. Wait how do you know my name questioned Apollo?

Apollo shot the attacker again, this time in the leg like he was.

The attacker was actually Trucy! She looked at Apollo while she was about to die.

WHAT THE FUCK TRUCY YOU FUCKING TRIED TO FUCKING KILL ME YOU STUPID NIGGER ASS BITCH! said Apollo.

Apollo was about to call the cops when Trucy got back up and stabbed him in his other leg, incapacitating him and knocking him out.

Meanwhile in the detention center.

Its you too said the prosecutors. They were joined by Gumshoe and Fulbright who had guns to their backs, ready to shoot at any fucking time.

WHAT IN THE HOLY NAME OF JESUS MOTHERFUCKING FUCKING CHRIST IS GOING THE FUCK ON HERE said Phoenix.

We're the prosecutors taking your case said Edgeworth. What THE FUCK! WE'RE INNOCENT! said Athena. Nigga, said Phoenix, what the fuck?

Because you faggot niggers are guilty, retards! said Godot. You deserve to ROT IN HELL WHERE YOUR FAGGOT ASSES BELONG! said Blackquill.

And what the fuck are YOU NIGGERS doing here? said Athena. I didn't ask for your STUPID BITCH ASS NIGGER FAGGOT ASSES said Phoenix.

Fucking hell said Gumshoe, you niggers are fucking retarded! You know your asses are guilty! We have all the FUCKING WITNESSES!

Like who, dumbass said Athena. Who the fuck are you asking to testify for us? We all know you two niggers did the crime!

Oh, we have that covered said Fulbright. These sexy prosecutors here will shake their asses- I mean testify!

We have all the fabricated evidence and fake testimonies we need to prove you guilty! said Edgeworth. Your ass is grass!

What the fuck EDGEWORTH THAT'S FUCKED UP! said Phoenix. And who's going to fucking defend our asses? said Athena.

Wait, can we call Apollo? He can defend us! said Phoenix. The guard let them call Apollo.

Why isn't that faggot answering his phone? FUCKING ANSWER APOLLO! said Phoenix. He's probably fapping to child porn said Athena.

Lol dumbass can't get a defense attorney! said Fulbright. WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO DEFEND OUR ASSES? said the attorneys.

Oh it's real simple. The two of you just DEFEND YOURSELVES! said Gumshoe. We can't FUCKING DO THAT said the attorneys. DUMBASS!

And how the fuck do our asses investigate and shit if we're in the cell said Phoenix. Oh it's real simple said Gumshoe. You fucking DON'T!

The prosecution will handle all investigation from now onwards said Blackquill. You fags don't have to worry said Godot.

THATS NOT FAIR said Phoenix. GIVE US A FUCKING CHANCE TO DEFEND OURSELVES said Athena.

Lol no! Fuck yourselves, niggers said Fulbright. Fulbright shot Phoenix in the dick and walked off with the prosecutors.

FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING NIGGER ASS JEW RETARD NIGGER CUNT FAGGOT JEW! said Phoenix and Athena as they flipped them off.

Hey homies, you want some drugs? said the guard who was a secret drug dealer. Nigga fix us up with some kush said Phoenix.

Phoenix and Athena got some weed, meth, and a couple of assault rifles. They stowed it all in their suits so the other guards wouldn't see.

It's a surprise tool that will help us later said Phoenix.

The next day, the trial started. In the lobby, Phoenix and Athena were having sex while hiding from the guard.

While fucking, the two discussed their trial. Okay so what the FUCK can we say to the fucking prosecutors? said Athena as her ass was fucked.

Goddamn that cunt hits DEEP! said Phoenix. Oh and the prosecutors are fucking forging evidence SO WE CAN'T FUCKING DO ANYTHING!

FUCK! said Athena. The prosecutors, Gumshoe, and Fulbright came across them fucking. Well well well said the prosecutors.

If it isn't Phoenix and Athena, the guilty ass niggers. I would wish I was you, Wrong, but she's too much of a loser to be sexy anymore said Edgeworth.

We have the perfect evidence, the fucking perfect witnesses, perfect EVERYTHING! said Godot. The prosecutors took a quick meth break.

Why the fuck are you wasting time doing meth said Phoenix. Fucking retard.

Because we can and we don't need any more time to win this trial said Payne. Your asses are fucked, both literally and figuratively! Get FUCKED!

At least we're not fucking faking evidence and witnesses said the attorneys! We're fucking done wasting our time here said the prosecutors.

The prosecutors left their asses. FUCK! How can we beat fucking cheaters? Our asses have no fucking evidence! said Phoenix.

Wait I have an idea said Athena. She whispered to Phoenix so no other niggers could hear.

Oh that's GENIUS ATHENA! 100% IQ plays right here said Phoenix. The two of them got sinister grins on their faces as they realized their sexy plan.

The trial started. The court is in session for Phoenix Wrong and Athena Shits, whatever. Can I have my meth break already said the judge.

Fucking dumbass judge can't get our fucking names right said Phoenix. The prosecution is ready said Edgeworth, Godot, Blackquill, and Payne.

Wait WHAT!? THE PROSECUTION CAN'T BE MORE THAN ONE PERSON said Athena. THAT'S FUCKING CHEATING!

I don't give a shit bitch said the judge. Shut the fuck up and get back in the kitchen where your bitch ass belongs. GET FUCKED said Godot.

Fucking gay ass nigger said Athena. The defense is ready, Your Honor said Phoenix just like he does in the fucking games.

Call a witness and shit said the judge as he snorted some crack and jacked off to furry hentai on the judge's stand.

I call DETECTIVE FULBRIGHT TO THE STAND said Blackquill as he pounded the table and shit. STATE YOUR NAME AND OCCUPATION said Edgeworth.

Fulbright went up to the stand. Damn I could use a meth break he said as he injected some meth. Godot threw coffee into his face.

WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT GODOT! said Fulbright. He shot Godot in the dick. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST said Godot.

Wait YOUR HONOR DID YOU SEE WHAT JUST FUCKING HAPPENED? said Athena. Your Honor? said Phoenix.

Don't fucking interrupt my porn, niggers. I'm not the one on trial here, fags said the judge as he was fapping and snorting cocaine.

How about you all SHUT THE FUCK UP so my fucking ass can TESTIFY said Fulbright who had an assault rifle in his hands and was aiming it.

Testify to the court how fucking GUILTY THEIR ASSES ARE said Payne as he was fapping to Phoenix's sexy ass. Fine you fucking Jew said Fulbright.

Okay so I was just walking around the ghetto until Phoenix and Athena targeted me! They threatened to rape me if I didn't come with them!

I went in their white van that promised free candy but was kidnapped and taken to their sex dungeon!

They kidnapped my FUCKING FAMILY and had tortured my little sister a year ago and killed her! My... my poor little sister! said Fulbright.

He cried obviously fake tears and the entire court gallery started crying because of his sad story.

That's why THOSE FUCKING NIGGERS ARE GUILTY! said Fulbright as he pointed to the guilty faggots.

OBJECTION! said both Athena and Phoenix at the same time immediately. That story's as true as Payne being straight. That is, it ISN'T! said Athena.

I mean she is true said Payne. I mean yuck! It's ugly and gross, eww girls are YUCKY said Payne who was being really gay.

Why the FUCK is our story not true said Edgeworth. Even a kindergartener can see that this logic is airtight. You fuckers are retarded as hell.

Shut up said Phoenix. If his sister had been kidnapped a year ago then how does he know about it.

Also Athena is a girl. How can a girl threaten to rape a guy. That's right, IT CAN'T HAPPEN! YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID! said Phoenix.

He has a good point there, girls can't rape guys said Godot as he snorted coffee grains. DAMN IT said Edgeworth as his argument was invalidated.

Also why did you go into the van if you knew they were trying to rape you, dumbass! said Athena. You would have known there was no free candy!

Bitch I love my fucking candy. Black licorice, Necco wafers, candy corn. The good shit said Fulbright.

Yuck said Phoenix not even His Honor is fucking old enough to eat that shit. Gay ass faggot candy. Another contradiction to add to the pile!

Also the fact that you like black licorice means that YOU LIKE BLACK COCKS! SO YOU'RE GAY! SO YOUR ARGUMENT IS AUTOMATICALLY INVALID!

NOOOOOOOO said the prosecutors. Their only witness was invalidated with Phoenix and Athena's flawless lawyer logic.

GET THE FUCK OFF THE FUCKING STAND FULBRIGHT said Blackquill with a sword in his hand and heroin in the other. Jeez nigger FIIIIIINE!

Dude what the fuck are we going to do said Godot. We only have one witness left!

I know what to do said Edgeworth. We'll have to bring out the falsified evidence! Get the video tape! Payne got the video tape.

The judge was still snorting crack and watching hentai. Oh my hentai is over. The fuck happened said the judge.

The witness's argument was INVALIDATED said Phoenix. Seems legit said the judge as he clicked on another hentai video and got some meth.

We have a piece of decisive evidence that will TURN THE CASE ON ITS FUCKING HEAD! said Payne. It's this fucking tape.

Anybody have a VHS player around here anymore? said Payne. What the fuck nigger, are you retarded or something? said Athena.

It's the 2020s, nobody uses that fucking shit anymore. said Phoenix. Oh shit said Payne. Payne pulled out a disc from his pocket.

This should work said Payne. He got a TV out and played it on.

Oh damn that fine ass said Payne as he was about to fuck his boyfriend. He had a ball gag and a dildo on and was tied up, naked.

His boyfriend twisted his wrinkly nipples as he was about to assfuck Payne's titties.

What. The. FUCK. said everybody in the court. UH YOU WEREN'T MEANT TO SEE THAT said Payne. Payne are you fucking serious said Godot.

THAT WAS YOUR FUCKING GAY SEX TAPE, NOT THE FUCKING EVIDENCE! said Blackquill.

The only other thing besides Payne that just got fucked here was your credibility said Athena.

Damn that was a fine ass though, right? said Payne. Edgeworth responded by shooting that faggot in the dick again.

Also why the fuck were you carrying a gay sex tape in your pocket said Godot. Fucking gay ass nigger shit. Everyone was silent for a few seconds.

Uh, call another fucking witness! said Blackquill. GUMSHOE GET IN HERE! Gumshoe! Get in here!

Gumshoe didn't come.

GET THE FUCK IN HERE! said Edgeworth, who was starting to get drunk off the rubbing alcohol he chugged that morning.

Still no response. Then the witness doors opened and SOMEONE CAME IN!

The court was shocked for another few seconds. It was APOLLO!

To be continued in Part 6: The Trial: Part 2.


	6. The Trial: Part 2

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 6: The Trial: Part 2

Apollo woke up from being knocked out. WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED he said as he looked around the room he was in. The room smelled familiar to him.

Someone came in. It was Trucy. She was wearing a really lewd outfit and started shaking so her tits and ass jiggled like in hentai.

WHAT THE FUCK TRUCY said Apollo. Oh it's you Polly said Trucy as she walked over. Damn I wish your clothes were off so I can suck your dick.

Apollo tried to get up but he was chained to the bed. FUCKING HELL said Apollo. GET ME OUT OF HERE YOU FUCKING BITCH WHORE said Apollo.

Oh your ass isn't fucking going anywhere when I'm here said Trucy. Don't worry Polly, I'll keep you company here said Trucy. She started stripping bare naked.

Once Trucy was completely nude, Apollo got rock hard. Trucy took off his pants and started riding his dick.

FUCKING STOP IT TRUCY said Apollo. YOU'RE LIKE MY SISTER OR SOMETHING THIS IS FUCKED UP screamed Apollo.

Oh, FUCK! Nobody's going to fucking hear your screams in here Polly! said Trucy as she was raping Apollo. GET THE FUCK OFF MY DICK screamed Apollo.

Also aren't you fucking 17 or something? YOU'RE MAKING ME A FUCKING PEDOPHILE TO FUCKING RAPE ME YOU FUCKING BITCH! said Apollo.

Women can't even rape men, dumbass. You got hard because you wanted to fuck me. That's how you showed consent said Trucy.

NO IT DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT, YOU FUCKING BITCH said Apollo. I'm also 18 too, just turned 18 a couple weeks ago. So I'm perfectly legal said Trucy.

Doesn't make this any more fucked up! Rape is illegal no matter what age you are said Apollo. IM GOING TO CALL THE COPS ON YOUR NIGGER ASS!

What the fuck are the cops going to do? The case would be a young girl against an older man, everybody would obviously take my side said Trucy.

All I have to do is cry and play the victim and I get off. Oh but don't worry Polly. I'm not going to let them take you away from me said Trucy.

While his dick was being raped, Apollo looked around the room to find guns to shoot Trucy. There was one, but it was right next to her.

Apollo was too chained up to be able to grab a gun to kill Trucy. I THOUGHT I FUCKING KNEW YOU, DICK SUCKING WHORE FAGGOT NIGGER said Apollo.

Oh, and I almost forgot said Trucy as she was fucking Apollo. Trucy grabbed the gun next to her and aimed it at Apollo's face.

One wrong move and I'll blow your fucking brains out said Trucy. FUCKING HELL BITCH said Apollo. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! said Apollo.

The fact that Apollo was being raped by Trucy made his appearance in the trial really suspicious. But nobody in the court knew that.

What's up mein homies said Apollo as he started to snort some crack on the witness stand.

APOLLO IS THAT YOU said Athena and Phoenix. Ja said Apollo. His arm immediately went into the Nazi salute. Heil Hitler said Apollo to the court.

Why the fuck are you doing the Nazi salute said Athena. I just felt like celebrating the fourth Reich today. Heil der Fuehrer said Apollo.

Phoenix and Athena got a badass idea. Your Honor, LET APOLLO TESTIFY said the two. The judge was too busy fapping to hentai to notice them.

OBJECTION said the prosecutors. APOLLO JUST CAME IN HOW CAN YOU LET HIM TESTIFY!? said Edgeworth. THAT'S NOT FAIR said Godot.

Don't let me testify, mein testimony ist fucking gay said Apollo in a thick German accent. He was still saluting Hitler and injecting meth.

NO TESTIFY TO THE COURT said Athena and Phoenix. They were practically screaming at Apollo at this point.

Nein said Apollo. GET THAT FAGGOT OUT OF THE FUCKING COURT said Edgeworth. The court guards dragged Apollo out.

NO GET HIM BACK HERE! NO! said Phoenix. YOU MOTHERFUCKING FAGGOT RETARD NIGGER JEW FAGGOT! said Athena. Lol retards said Payne.

Call a fucking recess, Your Honor! We need time to FUCKING REGROUP! said Phoenix. Okay fine faggots said the judge as he was done fapping.

WHAT THE FUCK said all the prosecutors. Godot tried to shoot the judge with his coffee mug, but the judge deflected the mug back at Godot's ass.

Blackquill tried to hit Phoenix and Athena with his sword but it flew back at him like a boomerang, slicing the court gallery's heads off and cutting his leg.

In the gallery, Phoenix and Athena were too invested in the trial to have sex. WHAT THE FUCK DO WE DO THEY TOOK APOLLO AWAY said Phoenix.

Apollo was kinda acting a little gay today. He was talking in German and acted like a Nazi for some fucking reason said Athena.

Even so WE NEED APOLLO BACK said Phoenix. He was in the sex dungeon, he can incriminate Faggotshoe and Fagbright. You're right said Athena.

Athena and Phoenix left the court to find Apollo, ran right past the guard. APOLLO WHERE ARE YOU screamed the two. Then they saw him.

They hid behind some boxes and shit. Apollo went inside a building. What the fuck is that fag doing said Phoenix. I don't know said Athena.

In the building, Apollo got out a box from the corner. In it was some meth and weed. He smoked the weed while injecting meth and drinking isopropyl.

What's TAKING YOU SO LONG said a hot naked chick in the corner to Apollo. Who the fuck is that said Athena. Never seen that whore before.

I think someone's following me said Apollo to the woman. The lawyers heard that. OH SHIT said Phoenix. We need to get back to the court! said Athena.

Phoenix and Athena ran out of there like fucking Sonic. In the court, the prosecutors were taking a meth break.

Nigga we got this case down like I got your fucking mom down last night said Blackquill as he injected cocaine. Godot snorted some coffee and said yeah.

Homies the 15 minute recess is going to be over soon we better get ready to prosecute those niggers said Edgeworth. He took some hits of his blunt.

The court is back in session said the judge. Wait where's the fucking defense said the judge again.

Oh, it's real simple, Your Honor. The defense DIDN'T SHOW UP! So they're automatically GUILTY! said Payne. WE WIN said the prosecutors.

Gumshoe and Fulbright put down their weapons and were planning on getting the cops to execute Phoenix and Athena when they showed back up again.

WE'RE BACK said the two. FUCK FUCKING SHIT NIGGER FAGGOT FUCK! said the prosecutors and the detectives. Well I guess they're not guilty said the judge.

Oh did you faggots find that red suited retard fag said Edgeworth as he was snorting meth. FUCK NO THAT FAG GOT AWAY said the defense.

Lol you dumbass retards I could defend you better than you can said Godot. The court was back in session.

Call another fucking witness said the judge as he was about to snort more weed and watch furry hentai again. I call Gumshoe to the stand said Edgeworth.

Gumshoe came to the stand and immediately started fapping to Phoenix's sexy ass. State your name and occupation faggot said the prosecutors.

FINE FAGGOTS said Gumshoe. My name is Penis, I mean Dick Gayshoe, I mean Gumshoe. Dick Gumshoe. I'm a fucking detective, nigger.

Everybody was laughing at his name because it had dick in it. LOL OMG LOL HIS NAMES DICK! LIKE A PENIS! LOLLLLLL! said Payne.

Fucking testify you scrotum licking anal bag faggot retard Jew said Edgeworth. FIIIIINE JEEZ NIGGA I'll fucking TESTIFY faggot! said Gumshoe.

Okay so I was walking down the ghetto with Fulbright and we were smoking weed. We were looking for nine year old boys to rape.

Then we saw Phoenix and Athena who TRIED TO RAPE US! We shot them and they chased us! We went to their sex dungeon and saw the corpses there.

After that we tried to call the cops but Apollo was there! He kicked us in the nuts, tied us up, and raped us! said Gumshoe. He was traumatized.

His testimony was so sad and depressing the court gallery erupted into more tears.

OBJECTION! said Phoenix and Athena. What the fuck is wrong with my perfect ass testimony said Gumshoe. Oh, I don't know, FUCKING EVERYTHING?

First of all, why DIDN'T YOU MENTION FULBRIGHT'S FUCKING FAMILY BEING KIDNAPPED AND RAPED? said Athena.

Nigga, I was fucking raped and shit! You can't blame my sexy ass for fucking not remembering shit! said Gumshoe. Shut the fuck up said Phoenix.

If you really forgot so damn much then why did you describe what Apollo did to you in such detail? Fucking dumbass retard nigger Jew! said Athena.

Hoe, I was fucking raped by that fag, of course I would remember it! said Gumshoe. How about you SHUT YOUR ASS UP said the attorneys.

And what about the white van with the free candy? Fulbright said that he was taken away AGAINST HIS WILL in a fucking white van! said Phoenix.

Why does the van always have to be white? Fucking racist said Gumshoe. That's besides the point said the attorneys your TESTIMONY DOESN'T LINE UP!

If you drove there of your own will then what about being kidnapped in the van? said Athena.

Bitch, me and Fulbright went separately! I drove to save his ass from being kidnapped! Bitch, you're the reason women have so little rights said Gumshoe.

But you said YOURSELF earlier that "we went to their sex dungeon and saw the corpses there." WE went to their sex dungeon. You AND Fulbright!

Either you just fucking LIED in your earlier testimony or you're fucking LYING to us right fucking now! WHICH IS IT? said Phoenix.

Oh and you said that you wanted to rape nine year old BOYS! YOU ADMITTED YOU WERE A PEDOPHILE GUMSHOE said Athena.

And if Apollo kicked you in the nuts, SHOW US YOUR NUTSACK BRUISE! PROVE IT TO US, COWARD FAGGOT said Phoenix.

OBJECTION said Edgeworth. How about you shut your asses up! You both know that you're walking on thin ice here! said Godot. Yeah FAGS said Payne.

Objection said Phoenix. What evidence do you have proving this is true?

Prove that Gumshoe isn't a pedophile, was raped by Apollo, and went to the sex dungeon of his own free will with Fulbright. Then we'll see who the liar is!

Phoenix slammed his desk so hard the wind knocked Godot's coffee onto his visor, shattering it and dropping shards of glass into his ballsack.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT said Godot as his crotch was bleeding all over the floor. Wait a minute Phoenix. That gives me an idea said Athena.

What is it bitch said Phoenix. We should shoot Gumshoe in the crotch! If he bleeds all over, then it proves he wasn't bruised by Apollo said Athena.

Wow that's a genius idea said Phoenix. Athena got out her assault rifle and shot Gumshoe in the balls. HOLY FUCKING SHIT NIGGA said Gumshoe.

His crotch spilled blood all over the court floor. Your Honor, if Gumshoe bled so much THEN HE COULDN'T HAVE BEEN BRUISED BY APOLLO EARLIER!

The fuck said the judge as he was still watching hentai. Elaborate cuntlicker said Blackquill as he snorted meth.

You see, if Gumshoe got kicked in the nuts by Apollo, then he would have bled all the blood out of his ballsack! But he still has blood here!

If he's bleeding now, he would have never BEEN KICKED IN THE NUTS BY APOLLO WHEN HE WAS RAPED! said Athena.

Oh. said Edgeworth. My. said Payne. Balls! said Godot. The four prosecutors immediately broke into deranged, psychotic laughter.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA screamed the prosecutors as they laughed.

Is that SERIOUSLY the best you've got? Really? That PATHETIC excuse for fucking reasoning? Please! My mother could come up with a better reason!

I want you to tell me. Fucking... TELL ME! In what FUCKING RETARDED ASS WORLD THAT MAKES ANY SENSE! said Edgeworth.

Have you ever been kicked in the nuts before, Athena? Oh of course not you're a girl. You SHOULD know that it doesn't make you bleed out said Payne.

OBJECTION said Phoenix. If he really DID get kicked in the nuts then he SHOULD have a bruise on his nutsack! SHOW US YOUR NUTSACK GUMSHOE!

No way in the twelve circles of hell and heaven am I ever going to show my nutsack to the fucking court Phoenix! FUCKING DUMBASS! said Gumshoe!

DO IT! I want to SEE YOUR BALLS! said Phoenix. I WANT TO SEE YOUR MASSIVE, HAIRY ASS BALLSACK! said Phoenix.

FINE FINE YOU WIN PHOENIX! Detective Homosexual Boot, Gayshoe, Gumshoe! Show the entire fucking court your hairy nutsack said Edgeworth.

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST FINE said Gumshoe. He pulled his pants down to show his nutsack, but instead of his balls he had an assault rifle!

Gumshoe started shooting at the prosecutors! KILL THOSE FUCKING FAGGOTS! said Gumshoe. Fulbright came out and started shooting.

Then some ninjas came out of the shadows and threw shurikens at the prosecutors! WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS GOING ON said the prosecutors.

They started shooting at each other. Edgeworth shot at Gumshoe and Payne shot at Fulbright. Blackquill was ambushed by some ninjas!

FUCK said Blackquill as he was about to be killed. Then he saw the blood on the floor from the shot wounds and cum from Gumshoe's dick.

Then he saw the coffee from Godot's coffee cup and shit on the floor from Payne using his turd logs as dildos. Blackquill got a genius idea.

He mixed the four substances together, kinda like Avatar the last airbender. Blood, cum, coffee, and shit came together to make a new substance.

It was like flex paste, it was that strong. Phil Swift would be fucking proud. Blackquill coated his samurai sword in it and it made his sword sharper.

Blackquill 360 noscoped the ninjas with his samurai sword, it cut their heads off from their necks.

Edgeworth shot Gumshoe in the dick. This time, the bullet from this shot collided with the bullet from the first shot.

The two bullets both exploded in Gumshoe's dick, causing his entire crotch to be blown into pieces. Gumshoe's dick and balls were completely gone.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT FAGGOT NIGGER CUNT JEW RETARD NIGGER FAGGOT WHORE CUNT NIGGER RETARD JEW FAGGOT said Gumshoe.

Fulbright was raped from behind by Payne's two inch dick. He was shot and pinned down, then raped by Payne five times again.

FUCK YOU PAYNE YOU FUCKING FAGGOT NIGGER RETARD JEW said Fulbright as he was raped by Payne. Fucking faggot said Godot as he watched the fight.

There was blood everywhere on the court floor. Phoenix and Athena stood there in shock the whole time.

After the ninjas were all dead and Gumshoe and Fulbright were on the floor, the two were handcuffed and arrested.

What. said Phoenix. The. said Athena. FUCK said both Athena and Phoenix at the same time. The prosecutors had fought off all the ninjas.

The judge finally turned off his hentai. Did something fucking happen when I was fapping said the judge. Yeah said Phoenix, something happened.

Gumshoe and Fulbright were arrested for the crimes they committed. WAIT SO DOES THAT MEAN WE'RE INNOCENT said Athena.

Yeah said the judge it does mean you're innocent since they look like they committed the crimes because they were shooting people and shit. Faggots.

I hereby declare Phonics Wrong and Ass Lady Shits to be fucking NOT GUILTY said the judge as he banged his gavel on the judge's stand.

YES NIGGA HOMIE said Phoenix and Athena. The two had SOMEHOW won the fucking case.

Meanwhile, in the building from earlier, Apollo and the naked lady walked into another room.

So... have you been treating him well? said the runaway Apollo. The sexy nude chick replied. Yeah. He really does fuck like a true man, Klavier.

To be continued.


	7. The Ninjas Strike Back

The Cool Power Prosecutors Chapter 7: The Ninjas Strike Back

As soon as the trial ended the prosecutors went out of the court and celebrated. FUCK YES WE FUCKING GOT AWAY FROM THOSE TWO RETARDED FAGGOTS!

FUCK YOU! FUCKING NIGGERS! said the detectives as their asses got kicked into prison.

Nigga let's get some fucking meth and shit and snort that fucking shit said Godot. The four of them were about to exit the court.

Then SOME NINJAS came out of the shadows. FUCK said Blackquill. He used his samurai sword to slice their bodies in half.

The prosecutors started to use their disembodied limbs to kill the other ninjas. FUCKING DIE YOU RETARDS said the prosecutors as the limbs ripped off their heads.

There was so much blood on the floor that their shoes tracked blood wherever they walked which got on the carpet and shit.

The four of them went into one of the court waiting rooms. They put some hentai on the TV while smoking weed. Damn said Edgeworth as he was stoned off his ass.

Godot left to get some coffee. Out of the court room, he saw a ninja. WHAT THE FUCK said Godot as the ninja shot a shuriken at his crotch.

The shuriken dug into his ballsack. The impact dislodged the glass shards from his nuts from earlier. The shards flew into the ninja's eyes, blinding that fag.

Godot's dick swelled up to a foot long. His dick shot cum so hard the shuriken flew back into the ninja and sliced his head and brain in half.

Blood and brain matter spewed onto the court coffee machine and into the coffee. Godot drank the coffee. Damn this brain coffee hits like my fucking mom said Godot.

In the court holding room, Payne was so stoned on LSD that he started hallucinating that a hot dude was in front of him.

HOLY SHIT said Payne as he started to rape the imaginary guy. His dick was penetrating the air and cum dripped on the floor as Payne nutted in midair.

Goddamn it Payne said Blackquill. He stroked his samurai sword by lubing it up. The lube would be able to slice dicks off better said Blackquill.

While Blackquill was lubing up his sword Edgeworth was fapping to the hentai. Then the dude started talking and Edgeworth's dick went limp because he was straight.

I FUCKING HATE IT WHEN THE GUY SHOWS UP AND I LOSE MY FUCKING BONER said Edgeworth. He took some shots of rubbing alcohol and got drunk.

Payne's LSD wore off and the guy disappeared. FUCK said Payne. Wow you fucking fag did you imagine some fucking faggot guy blowing your cock or something?

Blackquill was so high at this point that he started shooting the window. The glass shards broke Edgeworth's rubbing alcohol, spilling it into his eyes.

FUCK ASS NIGGER SHIT FUCK RETARD JEW said Edgeworth.

Meanwhile in the court hallway Godot heard people talking.

Is it some fucking Jews or something pondered Godot as he walked in their direction. It was the JUDGE talking to some ninjas.

Old ass faggot you're going to pay for getting those two niggers guilty! said the ninjas. Godot was overhearing their conversation. The fuck's going on said Godot.

The ninjas held shurikens to the judge's throat and were about to slit it when Godot came in. He threw the brain coffee mug on one of the ninjas.

Then he shot bullets at the other ninja's brain, shooting some brain matter into the judge's coffee. Nigga you aight said Godot to the fucking judge.

Faggot get me my fucking coffee said the judge, as I'm too fucking stoned on meth and fapping to get up and get that shit myself. Fine faggot nigger said Godot.

Godot gave the judge his brain coffee. Damn this shit hits the spot said the judge as he drank the coffee. Godot got some popcorn and put it in the microwave.

The judge was so high that he took off his clothes and started twerking his old man titties. Ew gay said Godot as he was eating his popped popcorn.

Godot got out of there and back to the holding room. Niggas this brain coffee hits the fucking spot said Godot as he was drinking brain coffee and smoking cocaine.

Edgeworth's rubbing alcohol wore off and he started shooting the wall to alleviate his pain. FUCKING DIE DIE DIE said Edgeworth. He wasn't shooting anybody.

The prosecutors got some brain coffee because they were too high on meth to make rational decisions.

Damn what's that said Payne as he saw a hot guy's ass. He saw a drug deal taking place outside and ran outside to get some cocaine.

The prosecutors followed him. Nigga you gonna fucking pay said the dealer as his Coke was stolen. At least I still have some Pepsi said the dealer, and some cocaine.

The hapless thief was caught by Godot. He wanted to shoot him in the eyes with his visor, but it didn't shoot laser beams.

FUCK said Godot. The other prosecutors shot the thief in the dick as he dropped the Coke. Damn why couldn't that fag have a Pepsi said Blackquill.

Then they saw the Pepsi that the drug dealer had. How much you willing to pay for this fucking Pepsi said Edgeworth. It's not for sale said the dealer.

Fine nigga said Payne as he shot the drug dealer in the dick. He died. Nigga let's get some of that cocaine said Godot. They started to snort it.

The prosecutors went into the ghetto and started to shoot niggers again for the first time in forever. Just like old times said Edgeworth as he was flooded with nostalgia.

Nine years ago Edgeworth had been 420 blazing, shooting niggers with Phoenix, Maya, and Gumshoe. Damn said Edgeworth where did the years go.

In prison, the detectives were depressed. Fuck where can you get some bleach in prison said Gumshoe. Nigga I want to fucking chug bleach like some Clorox.

Dude nigga are you fucking retarded? We have fucking telegraphic signals we can send to our ninjas to attack Edgefag and the other nigger prosecutors said Fulbright.

DUDE NIGGA ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED? They got TAKEN AWAY FROM US when we got into fucking prison said Gumshoe. Oh fuck damn it nigger said Fulbright.

Wait if we can get hold of our signal telegraphers then we can get our revenge on the prosecutors said Fulbright. HOW THE FUCK DO WE DO THAT said Gumshoe.

It's real simple said Fulbright. We just gotta get to where they have our shit locked up and get it back. I have a plan said Fulbright.

Nigga we gotta get to our showers. We can think of a plan while our asses shower said Gumshoe. They agreed to discuss while in the shower later.

Edgeworth was spending so much time reminiscing that he forgot that he was killing black people. He shot his assault rifle at some more niggers, killing them all.

Oh let's hunt for some Jews too said Blackquill. But where do Jews hang out said Payne. Mcdonalds nigga said Godot. Jews really like their fucking chicken nuggets.

They found a nearby Mcdonalds. They went in the Mcdonalds and found some Jews, niggers, and fags. They were all shot and killed.

Athena and Phoenix were found INNOCENT just a few hours ago! Fuck! Those fags at the court NEVER DO ANYTHING RIGHT said the news guy. The TV was shot.

Fucking fags on the news never say anything right said Edgeworth. Nigga we got to get some chicken mcnuggets said Payne. Nigga that shit hits that SPOT said Godot.

Edgeworth went to the counter to order some chicken mcnuggets. He killed all the other people in line and taped the door shut with some flex tape.

GET ME SOME FUCKING MCNUGGETS said Edgeworth to the cashier with a gun to that fag's face. FINE JESUS said the cashier. YOU GET YOUR FUCKING MCNUGGETS!

Goddamn it what's taking that nigger so long said Godot as he was fapping to porn. Blackquill started shooting the wall because he was stoned and high.

The mcnugget guy came back with the mcnuggets. Edgeworth shot and killed him with his assault rifle.

Edgeworth sawed the cashier's organs and mixed them into the mcnugget batter where the workers are. Now the next mcnuggets will have human flesh in them.

He got his own chicken mcnuggets and brought them to the other prosecutors. Damn finally our fucking mcnuggets arrived said Blackquill.

They started to eat their mcnuggets, but something felt wrong! Damn these taste like monkey scrotum wiener asshole said Payne.

Edgeworth took a look at his mcnuggets and saw something! FUCK! There's cyanide in these mcnuggets! That fag tried to kill us said Edgeworth.

They spat out their nuggets and went behind the counter. WHY THE FUCK IS THERE CYANIDE IN OUR CHICKEN MCNUGGETS said the prosecutors as they had guns.

Nigga we're just Mcdonalds workers said the Mcdonalds worker. Godot threw coffee at his face. FUCK ASS SHIT NIGGER said the worker as he took his mask off.

IT WAS A FUCKING NINJA! FUCK said the prosecutors. The workers revealed themselves to be ninjas. They shot shurikens at the prosecutors. FUCK ASS SHIT said Payne.

The prosecutors fled into their tank. They were so drunk that they drove over the sidewalk, killing tons of people.

Meanwhile in prison, Gumshoe and Fulbright were taking a shower with other inmates.

Nigga what the fuck are we going to do nigga said Fulbright. Damn your dick is so fucking big said Gumshoe as he was staring at Fulbright's 10 inch cock.

HOW THE FUCK DO WE GET OUR FUCKING TRANSMITTER THINGS BACK said Fulbright. WE NEED TO GET THE NINJAS TO BREAK OUR ASSES OUT!

Nigga I got a genius 200 IQ play here homie. We kill some guards, disguise ourselves as guards, and then get the transmitters to break ourselves out! said Gumshoe.

Wait why the fuck can't we just use our guard outfits to escape through the front door said Fulbright as he was using soap to scrub his ballsack.

Because we need our transmitter and shit to summon our ninja niggas to kill the prosecutors said Gumshoe. Seems legit said Fulbright, how are we doing that shit?

So here's the plan. We kick some guards in the nuts then steal their uniforms. Then we ask around for where the prisoners' stuff is fucking stored.

Then we break in there and steal that shit and shit from other prisoners. We get the ninjas and get our fucking revenge said Gumshoe. Seems legit said Fulbright.

Gumshoe was so invested in his sexy plan that he didn't notice that he was holding his soap. He dropped the soap.

Oh shit I dropped the soap said Gumshoe. He leaned down to pick up the soap and you can guess what happened next.

The prosecutors were shooting ninjas in their tank. They had killed most of them and held them at gunpoint at the strip club. GET ON THE FUCKING FLOOR said Payne.

Godot threw coffee at the ninjas and unmasked them. Blackquill shaved their faces off with his sword and peeled their flesh. Blood squirted all over the ground.

PLEASE DON'T FUCKING KILL ME NIGGA said the ninja as he was about to die. Who the fuck sent your fucking stupid ninja ass said Edgeworth. I don't know said the ninja.

I SAID WHO THE FUCK SENT YOU said Edgeworth as he pulled out an assault rifle to his face. GUMSHOE AND FULBRIGHT ARE IN FUCKING PRISON said Godot.

MEIN FUHRER DID said the ninja as he heiled Hitler. He pulled down his sleeve revealing a swastika armband. Wait so the NINJAS ARE FUCKING NAZIS said Blackquill.

Shut the fuck up said Payne as he shot and killed the Nazi ninja. WHAT THE FUCK PAYNE! WE COULD HAVE GOTTEN INFORMATION OUT OF THAT FAG! said Edgeworth.

The brain matter flew into Godot's coffee, making some more brain coffee. Damn I should patent this shit said Godot as he drank his brain coffee.

Goddamn it we need to get Hitler on the phone so we can tell him to stop sending motherfucking ninjas at us. I thought it was the fucking detectives! said Blackquill.

Speaking of the detectives, in prison the two detectives were hiding behind a guard. FUCK! I hate these fucking retarded ass faggot prisoners! said the guard.

Boo said Gumshoe. Surprise motherfucker said Fulbright as he hit the guard on the head, killing him instantly. Gumshoe disguised himself as a guard.

They crept up behind another guard. FUCK WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED HE GOT FUCKING HIT ON THE HEAD said the other guard.

Then the other guard was killed by a hit to the head. Fulbright got in his disguise and the two of them were about to go to where the transmitters were.

NIGGA I JUST REALIZED said Fulbright. WE DON'T KNOW WHERE THE FUCKING TRANSMITTER IS! said Fulbright. Motherfucking dammit you're right said Gumshoe.

Fulbright went to ask a guard where the prisoners' stuff was. Nigga, mah homie, where's the fucking prisoners' shit at, dawg? said Fulbright.

Mah nigga, that shit is in the fucking prisoners' shit room. Take two lefts, then a right, then go down the stairs, then take two more lefts, and then three rights.

The prisoners' shit should be on your fucking left, dawg said the guard. They killed the guard to keep him from spilling the beans that they were in disguises.

What was it, two lefts then a right said Fulbright. Then go down the stairs and two more lefts said Gumshoe. Then three more rights said Fulbright. YES said the two.

They had found the room with their transmitter. There was a lot of shit in there. Drugs, guns, some tanks, and other shit. DAMN SON said the two as they stole shit.

They stole and snorted as much cocaine as they could, and then stole some guns and tanks. Nigga where's the goddamn motherfucking transmitter at said Fulbright.

Over there home slice said Gumshoe. They got the transmitters. But something was wrong. The frequency was misaligned. They tried adjusting it so it would work.

While adjusting it, they intercepted a message from some mustached German guy. That seems interesting let's listen said Gumshoe.

Meanwhile, somewhere in the city the fake Apollo and Trucy were talking. HOW THE FUCK DID YOU NOT TESTIFY said Trucy. They said I was disruptive or something.

They kicked me out before I could fucking say anything! Fucking niggers! said the fake Apollo. And get that retarded mask off said Trucy. Ja said the fake Apollo.

He took off his mask, revealing that it was Klavier. Damn that mask sucks mein ass and it's sweaty and shit! FICK! said Klavier. But you're looking kinda hot today.

How about I tap that luscious little girl ass and hit it like der Fuehrer gasses the Jews in camps said Klavier. Shut up said Trucy. Have you gotten any messages?

The Fuehrer's supposed to be sending us a message telling us which retards to kill next said Trucy. Nein der Fuehrer hasn't sent any ficken messages said Klavier.

Get the fucking receiver out so we can talk to that nigger said Trucy. Klavier got out the receiver. Mein Gott, this fucking retarded ass scheissficken isn't working!

Try moving it around or something, I don't fucking know said Trucy. She was smoking some weed and drinking rubbing alcohol.

I think somebody fucking INTERCEPTED OUR MESSAGE! FICK! said Klavier. GODDAMN IT! said Trucy. Fucking stupid ass worthless nigger Jew faggot cunt said Trucy.

In the prison, Gumshoe and Fulbright had gotten Hitler's message. Is this the magic whore and the gay retard said Hitler. I have another mission for you faggots.

As soon as the two of them saw who it was, they immediately started heiling Hitler. Sieg Heil said the detectives. Nigga IT'S HITLER! I'M HIS BIGGEST FAN!

Dude we should get that faggot's autograph said Gumshoe. Wait you're not the fucking faggots! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU JEWS? said Hitler as he was smoking pot.

Nigga we're the fresh street niggas, the dawgz with a z, the homies of the hood, y'know what I'm sayin'? said Fulbright.

Stop talking like a fucking nigger, fucking inferior ass race. Should have incinerated all those black niggers back in World War II, said Hitler as he was smoking meth.

Homie we'll do anything to get rid of those niggers said Gumshoe. Fuck niggers said Fulbright as he flipped off every black person on Earth with his middle finger.

You faggots want in? Fine retards! Get to the fucking court storage house! The two retards are there for your faggot asses said Hitler.

But we're STILL IN FUCKING PRISON! HOW THE FUCK DO WE GET OUT OF HERE! said Fulbright. Which retarded ass prison said Hitler. I don't know, the PRISON!

Every prisoner in this fucking city goes to this faggot place said Gumshoe. Fine faggots I'll send some Nazis and ninjas to break your fucking Jew asses out said Hitler.

YES HOMIE FINALLY WE GET OUT OF HERE said the detectives. When we get out, those prosecutors are FUCKED UP THEIR FUCKING ASSES! said the detectives.

To be continued in chapter 8.


	8. The Detectives Escape Prison: Part 1

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 8: The Detectives Escape from Prison: Part 1

After winning the trial, Phoenix and Athena headed to the court parking lot to leave. On their way there, they saw Godot killing a ninja and drinking brain coffee.

What the fuck said the two as they kept walking. On their way there, they were stopped by a fucking retarded ass Jew.

Want to play with my toys said the Jew as it walked towards the two with its fucking dildos. EWW GET THE FUCK AWAY YOU FUCKING NIGGER said the two attorneys.

Phoenix shot the faggot in the dick and used his knife to slice that retard into pieces. Let's bag that nigger and eat it for fucking dinner said Athena. Good idea said Phoenix.

The two went to the parking lot. Damn we need a fucking tank or something said Phoenix, my tank's in the fucking ghetto. Then get that shit back, dumbass said Athena.

As soon as Athena said that, they heard a noise come from the ghetto. What the shit was that fuck said Phoenix. DO WE HAVE TO GO TO THE FUCKING GHETTO said Athena.

Fucking black ass niggers are there, retards said Athena. The two of them went to the ghetto. Damn what the fuck's going on here said Phoenix. Then they saw a nigger.

OH SHIT HOMIE NIGGA said the nigger as it went back into its fucking black ass building. FOLLOW THAT NIGGER said Phoenix.

They walked in. It was a tank bunker. There were a lot of tanks in there. They were all stolen, of course, since it's the ghetto and there are a lot of black people there.

The nigger got in a tank. It was Phoenix's tank. GIVE ME THAT FUCKING TANK BACK YOU STUPID ASS NIGGER JEW RETARD! said Phoenix as he was shooting.

The tank ran over Phoenix's foot and escaped. FUCK said Phoenix. AFTER THAT FUCKING THING said Athena. Both started shooting at the tank to try to bring it down.

NIGGA HOMIE DESE WHITE PEOPLE BE TRIPPIN DAWG said the nigger as it was heading towards the city. FUCK said Phoenix THAT FAGGOT IS GOING TO KILL WHITES!

Whatever. I don't give a shit. Even if I get that fucking tank back I'm not touching nigger germs. Just take a random tank and let's get the fuck out said Phoenix.

The two of them got in the tank. Damn the lighting in here is making your tits look bigger said Phoenix to Athena. He started groping her tits and they started to fuck.

DAMN FUCK ME HARDER said Athena. The two of them were fucking while the tank was moving, so the tank was crushing people and Jews.

The two of them were driving towards the Wright Anything Agency when some cops came up to them. STOP IN THE NAME OF THE FUCKING LAW said the cops.

OH SHIT said Athena and Phoenix. They stopped fucking and started shooting at the cops in their tank.

Meanwhile in the court storage house, Klavier and Trucy were chatting with Hitler. Mah homie what the fuck? You didn't send us a motherfuckin' message said Klavier.

Nigga I was talking with some fuckin' detectives and shit in prison. We're going to break those fags out and get some more Nazis on our side said Hitler.

Sieg Heil said Trucy as she was heiling Hitler. Oh and HOW THE FUCK DO WE BREAK THOSE FAGGOTS OUT said Trucy as she started to drink rubbing alcohol.

Klavier took a meth break and started to smoke meth. MEIN GOTT said Klavier as he was high on meth and cocaine.

Mah homies, you go to the fucking prison and shit and break those fags out! They're fucking SOMEWHERE in that gay ass fucking place said Hitler as he was smoking weed.

Fine retard said Klavier and Trucy as they started to smoke weed. Oh and can you get me some Mcdonalds on your way out? I'm having a craving for a fucking happy meal.

Get me some chicken mcnuggets in the happy meal. They better not have a gay ass fucking toy in that meal. I better get a hot girl, something straight said Hitler.

Fine mein Fuehrer said Klavier. They heiled Hitler as they ended the call. Trucy what the fick are we going to do with Apollo said Klavier. I don't fucking know said Trucy.

I'll ride his dick one more time and then we can go to the prison to break the retarded detectives out said Trucy. Seems legit said Klavier as he was doing a line of coke.

Hey Polly did you miss me said Trucy as she walked over to Apollo. FUCK NO I DIDN'T! GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU FUCKING WHORE said Apollo.

Guess what. I don't fucking care said Trucy. She was too high to listen to his ass anyway, so she immediately started raping him again.

Apollo's body was covered in cum and encrusted blood from the shots, so it got all over Trucy's clothes. Damn that's hot said Trucy as she licked up the residue.

FUCKING HELL YOU DISGUSTING ASS BITCH CUNT said Apollo. PHOENIX IS GOING TO KILL YOU! said Apollo again. I don't give a flying shit said Trucy as she raped him.

After Apollo had cummed in Trucy ten times, she left. Meanwhile, Klavier was watching child porn and fapping. MEIN GOTT FICK! SCHEISSEN! FIIIIICKKKK! said Klavier.

Klavier had nutted all over the floor and the walls and himself. Damn said Trucy when she got back. She immediately started licking up Klavier's slimy cum.

Oh my god that tastes SO GOOD said Trucy. Now let's get to the fucking prison before Hitler fucking yells at our asses again said Klavier. Fine retard said Trucy.

Meanwhile, in the prison Gumshoe and Fulbright were fapping and smoking the meth they found. Nigga this shit hits dawg said Gumshoe.

I know right homie. DAMN THIS FUCKING METH HITS LIKE MY FUCKING DAD SPANKS MY ASS said Fulbright. He started to look around for weapons. FUCK said Fulbright.

There's no fucking weapons here! Just drugs and shit! Retard ass nigger cunt! said Fulbright. Nigga we gotta steal some weapons from some guards said Gumshoe.

The two of them walked out of the hallway and saw a guard. OH SHIT said the guard. He started shooting his gun. Quick Gumshoe throw something at him said Fulbright.

Gumshoe picked up a nearby sawblade and threw it at the guard. It landed on his head and started sawing down his body until his entire body was split in half.

The guard's remains spilled all over the walls and floor, with guts, flesh, and brain matter flying in every direction.

There was blood everywhere on the floors. Damn this blood tastes good said Gumshoe as he was drinking the guard's blood and eating guts. You're right said Fulbright.

They took the guard's gun. Another guard came in. FUCK WHAT'S THIS SHIT THERE'S FUCKING BLOOD EVERYWHERE said the guard. They killed that retarded ass fag.

Nigga where's the grill at? We can make some fucking krabby patties with this human meat said Fulbright. Nigga I think there was one in the room. They got a grill.

Damn this grilled human burger meat is the SHIT! It's even better when it's raw! said Gumshoe. Nigga try putting some rubbing alcohol on it dawg said Fulbright.

Wow raw human burger meat with rubbing alcohol hits like my dick slapping on your ass said Gumshoe. This is the SHIT said Fulbright.

Meanwhile, the prosecutors were trying to find answers. Dude those ninjas were fuckin' Nazis! Where the fuck would Nazis be in this gay ass town said Edgeworth.

They were in their tank, shooting niggers as usual and running over Jews. Buildings were overturned as they were blown to fucking pieces by the tank's blasts.

Homie we should search the Walmart near here said Payne as he was snorting crack and fingering his asshole with a dildo.

Godot tried to use logic. Yeah niggers and Jews are at Walmart so the Nazis would be killing people there said Godot. Good thinking said the other prosecutors.

They drove their tank to the Walmart. FUCK! There's no parking spots said Blackquill. Then just fucking make some said Godot. Good idea said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth blew up a bunch of cars and parked his tank where the cars used to be. They walked into the Walmart carrying guns. Fuck the police said the prosecutors.

GET THE FUCK ON THE FLOOR! said Edgeworth to the cashiers. They put their hands up, but the cashiers were all shot and killed by Edgeworth anyway.

Payne went through the aisles to see where the shit he wanted was. Oh there it is said Payne. He had seen the sex toys. Damn those fucking dildos are BIG said Payne.

Payne fantasized about the length the dildos would penetrate his ass. Damn that would feel so FUCKING GOOD said Payne as he was about to stick the dildos in his ass.

Blackquill changed the channel on the display TVs to some child porn. He started to fap to that shit. FUCK said Blackquill as he was fapping.

Godot went straight for the coffee. Damn they have fucking gay ass fag coffee here. Nigga that's fucking RETARDED said Godot. I'm getting the fuck out of here.

Edgeworth was committing mass homicide at the counters by killing the retarded ass cashiers. He used the keys from the dead bodies to open and rob the cash registers.

Are there any faggot employees in this retarded ass place said Edgeworth. Remember we need to get more information about the fucking ninjas said Blackquill.

I KNOW RETARD said Edgeworth as he pointed his gun at Blackquill's dick. JESUS GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME said Blackquill. Edgeworth shot Blackquill in the nuts.

FUCKING DAMN IT NIGGA said Blackquill. Edgeworth went around to find the manager. RETARD JEW NIGGER FAGGOT CUNT said Blackquill. Lol nigger said Payne.

Edgeworth found the manager, Seymour Kuntz. He threatened Kuntz with his gun. YOU BETTER TELL ME WHERE THE FUCKING NINJAS CAME FROM FAGGOT said Edgeworth.

WHAT FUCKING NINJAS said Kuntz. YOU FUCKING KNOW THE NINJAS YOU FUCKING RETARD JEW said Edgeworth. He shot Kuntz in the leg. FUCK said Kuntz as he bled.

The fucking Nazi ninjas! They've been trying to fucking kill my ass for the last fucking day! WHERE DID THOSE FAGS COME FROM said Edgeworth.

They came from your mom's fucking ass said Kuntz. He was shot in the arm. WHERE DID THE FUCKING NINJAS COME FROM YOU RETARDED NIGGER said Edgeworth again.

THEY CAME FROM FUCKING GERMANY said Kuntz. Germany? Makes as much sense as you being gay. Since they're fucking Nazis said Edgeworth. He put the gun away.

You get off for now, you fucking nigger said Edgeworth. He pulled out his gun and shot Kuntz in the ass again. You get that for being a dumbass nigger said Edgeworth.

FUCK YOU YOU STUPID FUCKING RED SUIT CRAVAT RETARD said Kuntz as he bled all over the floor and called the hospital. The ambulance came by the Walmart.

Snipe that fag said Payne to Godot. Fine you fucking faggot nigger retard Jew said Godot. He shot the ambulance driver, causing the vehicle to crash into the Walmart.

The ambulance exploded, killing everyone in the nearby blast radius. The prosecutors all survived. Nigga let's loot the fucking ambulance said Godot.

They started to loot the ambulance and steal money. They massacred anybody who was running away from the blast with their machine guns. Kill them all said Payne.

Nigga what the fuck do we do? The ninjas are in fucking Germany! said Edgeworth. Dude let's take a blazing meth break first said the other prosecutors.

They blazed some meth and 420 snorted some cocaine. Some ninjas came into the Walmart and interrupted their meth break! FUCK said the prosecutors.

The prosecutors got in their tank, with the ninjas in hot pursuit, and left the Walmart.

Meanwhile, in the Wright Anything Agency, Phoenix and Athena were fighting off the cops. FUCK said the two. The cops had shot Phoenix in his arm again. FUCK!

That's my fucking fapping arm! Why do these niggers keep shooting its ass said Phoenix as he was in intense pain. Shut the fuck up said Athena to Phoenix. She shot him.

GODDAMN IT ATHENA STOP FUCKING SHOOTING ME screamed Phoenix. He hit her and started raping her. While raping her, he started to shoot the cops. DIE said Phoenix.

More cop cars showed up. Phoenix got in the tank with Athena and started running over cop cars, killing all the cops. Phoenix you're really good at killing cops said Athena.

Thanks cunt whore said Phoenix as he massacred cops and Jews. After they were all dead, the two of them drove towards the agency. Wait what's that on the tank?

The fuck is that? Wait that's a fucking BOMB said Phoenix and Athena. The bomb blew up, sending the tank flying into a building.

The building exploded with the tank, leveling the entire property and killing hundreds of people. At least it wasn't the agency said Phoenix. That would suck ass said Athena.

The two of them walked to the agency. The front door had bullets in it and blood. What the fuck happened here said the two attorneys as they walked in.

Oh shit it's fucking dark! I can't see shit! said Phoenix. Turn the lights on said Athena. Phoenix turned the lights on. OH HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HERE!

There was blood everywhere and gunshots. The bookshelves and plants and shit were tossed over. Apollo's porn magazines were all over the floor. Shit was messed up.

Wait, that's Apollo's porn magazines! I would recognize those underage girls anywhere! What the fuck happened to him said Athena. I don't FUCKING know said Phoenix.

They started investigating. Nigga we should look in Apollo's room said Athena. Fuck no, he probably has some retarded ass nigger shit in his room said Phoenix.

They started snooping around Apollo's shit. Phoenix looked under Apollo's bed and saw some magazines. Wait is this WHAT I THINK IT IS said Athena. Porn magazines!

I thought Apollo's porn was out in the office said Phoenix. That retard must have fapped so hard he brought his porn out there said Athena. Fucking pervert said Phoenix.

Oh shit said Athena. She saw Apollo's secret meth stash. Dude must have been rocking that fucking 420 meth like shit said Phoenix. Let me get a hit of that shit said Athena.

The two of them started to get high on Apollo's meth. Daaaaaaamn said Athena and Phoenix. While they were high on meth they stepped in some blood on the floor.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKING BLOOD ON THE FLOOR said the attorneys. Motherfucker I was wearing socks said Phoenix. Fucking retarded ass blood said Athena.

Apollo must have fucking cut himself so fucking hard, that emo ass faggot said Phoenix. He likes to slit his throat and drink bleach because he's depressed said Athena.

Oh and also what THE FUCK DID HE DO WITH TRUCY said Phoenix. If that bitch fucks his ass I'll beat her ass like fucking King Kong rapes bitches in bed said Phoenix.

Who gives a shit about Trucy said Athena as she smoked Apollo's cocaine stash. You're right said Phoenix. Then the TV came on.

A local Walmart was the site of a FUCKING SHOOTING! We suspect that four suited men were responsible for the shooting. We have a witness testifying said the news guy.

Nigga they shot my ass three times and blew up a fucking ambulance and nuked my fucking Walmart! THOSE FAGS WILL EAT MY FUCKING ASS said Seymour Kuntz.

The fuck shot up the Walmart? Fucking retarded ass cunts said Phoenix as he lit up another blunt. Wait what the fuck is that said Athena. She saw a pink dildo in the corner.

Wait a minute! That's Trucy's dildo! She must have done something with Apollo said Athena. Nigga chill the fuck down bitch said Phoenix. Smoke some fucking weed.

Athena started to smoke some weed. She was so high she started to stick the dildo in her ass. Damn nigga said Phoenix as he was high on LSD and meth.

Meanwhile, Klavier and Trucy were going to the ghetto in their retarded ass van. Nigga why the fuck are we going to this retarded ass gay place said Trucy as she was high.

Bitch please. Der niggers have the panzers and shit in here! If we get some tanks then we can shoot those niggers back to Germany said Klavier. Fuck yeah said Trucy.

OH JA said Klavier as they drove their van into the tank bunker. There were some niggers there. They were all killed immediately by the van crashing.

Fuck I want a fucking big ass tank to shoot fags in said Trucy. They were interrupted by some niggers. FREEZE WHITE CRACKAS WE GOT YOU DAWGZ SURROUNDED!

GET DA FUCK ON DA FLO said the niggers. GOTT DAMN IT said Klavier. Trucy got out her assault rifle and started shooting some niggers. It's open season said Trucy.

OH JA DIE! DIE DIE DIE! said Klavier as he massacred African Americans. After all the niggers were dead, both of them got in their own tanks. Let's kill some FAGS!

The two of them immediately headed for the prison. We're breaking those retards out whether they like it OR NOT said the two in their tanks. They headed for the prison.

Meanwhile, in the prison headquarters. Mein Fuehrer said the prison guard. There are two fags in tanks headed RIGHT FOR THE PRISON said the other guard.

Release the prison tanks said the head of the prison, Seymour Dix. But, mein Fuehrer, the tanks AREN'T READY YET! We can't use those fucking things said the stupid guard.

Did I stutter, retard? RELEASE THE FUCKING TANKS! Or else I'm throwing you in the furnace with all the other Jews said Dix. Yes, mein Fuehrer said the guards.

To be continued in The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 9: The Detectives Escape from Prison: Part 2


	9. The Detectives Escape Prison: Part 2

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 9: The Detectives Escape from Prison: Part 2

Klavier and Trucy were hauling their tanks to the prison. This is going to be easy as shit said Trucy. As soon as she said that the prison tanks came out. FICK said Klavier.

The prison tanks started shooting at Klavier and Trucy. FUCK said the two. They started shooting at some guards that came out to kill them. The guards were killed.

One shot knocked a guard out of his tank and on the floor. His skull cracked open, revealing his brain as it splattered all over the ground. WHAT THE SHIT said the guards.

KILL THEM ALL! DIE! DIE! said Klavier as he shot down guards with his assault rifle. Look out said Trucy as a tank crept up behind Klavier. OH SCHEISSEN said Klavier.

Meanwhile, in the prison headquarters.

Mein Fuehrer, what the fuck are we going to do? Those fags ARE FUCKING DESTROYING OUR TANKS said the prison guard to Seymour Dix. Nigga let me think for a second.

I think I got a fucking idea, nigger said Dix. You faggots go out and start shooting at them like normal people. When they get out of the tanks, pump their heads with lead.

Seems legit said the guard. The guard left. Dix shot the guard in the head before he left, causing brain matter and blood to splatter on the walls and into Dix's coffee.

Homie, this brain coffee hits different, dawg said Dix as he drank his brain coffee and got high on weed. 420 blaze it said Dix as he was 360 blazing marijuana.

Bitch what the fick are our German asses going to do said Klavier as he was shooting tanks. I'm not German! Fuck off with that gay shit said Trucy as she was snorting meth.

The two of them kept shooting tanks when they got a call from Hitler. Nigga what you want? Our asses are getting shot at by these black faggots said Trucy.

Mah homie, whazzap? Look dawg, you better not have forgotten to get my Mcdonalds! I wanted chicken mcnuggets in my happy meal! And no apple slices, those are for fags!

Also, I got some fucking ninjas in helicopters to break those retarded detectives out. You better bring those retards back soon with my mcdonalds said Hitler.

Nigga our asses are getting shot at like the Jews in the concentration camps! Fuck off with your nigger shit you fucking retard faggot said Trucy. She hung up on Hitler.

Fucking retard said Trucy to Klavier. Mein homie, these tanks are almost dead! JA said Klavier. They took out the rest of the tanks. YES NIGGA said the two of them.

Meanwhile, in the Wright Anything Agency, Phoenix and Athena haven't found any leads on Apollo's location. WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT NIGGER said Athena and Phoenix.

The two of them were about to leave the agency when they came across some suited guys. The fuck is going on over there said Phoenix.

Nigga whazzap homie? Got any of the shit? said one of the suited guys. I got some of the good shit, dawg. Want some meth, some weed, or some coke said the other guy.

Dawg, I got dat paper on me, homie. Gimme some of dat shit said the first guy. Nigga I got you dawg said the other guy. They exchanged the drugs. Nigga who's THAT.

The fuck is going on over there? Fucking gay ass suited niggers said the two guys. Wait that's a hot chick, let's tap that ass like we tap the lid on our Fanta bottles!

The two suited guys came out, not in that way you fucking perverts. The fuck? WAIT THOSE ARE NINJAS said Athena. The suited guys were indeed ninjas. FUCK said Phoenix.

The ninjas immediately kicked Phoenix in the nuts, incapacitating him. FUCK said Phoenix as he was knocked unconscious. Now it's just you and us said the ninjas to Athena.

FUCK said Athena as she was raped and naked. The orgasms from being raped were heard across the street. The fuck is that racket said the guy across the street.

Oh it's just some retards raping some chick said the guy. Nothing out of the ordinary in this fucking place said the guy. As soon as he said that a tank showed up.

The tank plowed through his house, instantly killing him by splattering his flesh all over the ground. Some ninjas were following the tank.

The FUCK IS THAT said Athena while she was being raped. The tank started shooting the agency, making holes in the walls. Part of the agency caved in and destroyed itself.

Oh hot DAMN that booty said the other ninjas who were following the tank. They found Athena and joined the rape, turning it into a gangbang scene straight out of Pornhub.

The fuck is happening? Wait the ninjas are distracted! Quick let's get the fuck out of here said the guys in the tank. Four men got out of the tank. It was the prosecutors.

Oh wait IT'S ATHENA! Let's fuck that ass! Fuck these retarded ass ninjas said Blackquill. The prosecutors shot all of the ninjas that were raping Athena, killing them all.

Blood and brain matter splattered all over Athena's naked body as their dead dicks fell out of her. Oh thank Jesus that those retarded niggers are gone said Athena in shock.

What's up, bitch said Edgeworth. We're gonna fuck that hot ass like we eat our chicken mcnuggets said Godot as he chugged coffee and injected meth into his bloodstream.

NO GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME said Athena. She was raped again by the prosecutors. Fucking straight ass fags said Payne. I hate women, they're fucking ugly said Payne.

Payne then saw Phoenix's unconscious body. He got an idea. How about I tap that hot lawyer ass said Payne. Payne stripped Phoenix down and started to rape him.

Meanwhile, in the prison, Seymour Dix was going to the shower. Fucking retard prisoners said Dix. He disguised himself as a prisoner and snuck into the men's shower.

He slapped the bars of soap out of the prisoners' hands. As soon as they leaned over he raped them and then drugged them. He brought them to the prison headquarters.

Nigga, the fuck you doing with this retarded ass prisoner shit said the guard. Why the fuck is your ass still here said Dix. You should be fucking driving out those retards.

Homie, dawg, home slice I was just fucking smoking some of your meth said the guard. Dix kicked him in the ballsack. FUCK ASS SHIT NIGGER RETARD CUNT said the guard.

Dix ripped the guard's shirt off and ripped the flesh off his chest. Then he took a knife and repeatedly stabbed the guard's eyeballs. He pulled the eyeballs out afterwards.

Dix severed the flesh connecting the eyes to the brain. The guard was screaming so much that Dix went in his throat and gutted out his vocal cords.

He poured some Clorox bleach onto the guard's open wounds until the entire bottle was empty. Then he slit the guard's wrists. I kinda wish I kept your vocal cords in.

Hearing you fucking scream makes my day so much better said Dix. He slit the guard's throat. Damn these are some firm, juicy eyeballs I got here. He salted the eyeballs.

Dix grilled the eyeballs with some of the guard's guts and then ate them. Tender and juicy, just how I like my eyeballs said Dix. But I should fucking clean up this blood.

As he was cleaning up the blood he saw the guard's giant dick. Damn that's a nice 14 inch rod he has there. Let me ride that fucking thing like a fucking cowboy said Dix.

As Dix was raping the guard's dead dick, Klavier and Trucy were at the entrance, ready to enter the prison.

Damn where are these faggots said Klavier. I need some fucking meth to smoke. I already used up my fucking METH on my fucking smoking pipe said Trucy as she was high.

Fucking retarded nigger ass JEW said Klavier. Does this retard know where those fags are said Trucy. There was a guard over in the corner. Nigga the fuck you know?

There be two fuckin' escaped detectives? Do you FICKEN know where mein homies went said Klavier. Dude I don't fucking know shit said the guard.

Everybody that's ever talked to those two cunts has ended up fucking dead said the guard. Oh, yeah. That reminds me said Trucy. She killed the guard with a headshot.

Damn his dick was real long said Trucy. She ripped his pants and underwear off to rape his dead dick. Bitch that's fucking GAY said Klavier as he started to smoke the air.

Klavier I'm a fucking GIRL you fucking retard! It's not gay said Trucy as she was still raping the dead guard. But where the fuck are those fucking detectives inquired Klavier.

I don't fucking know said Trucy. Maybe we should go to the showers. They like to drop soap there. The detectives are fucking gay so they would want to fuck men said Klavier.

As the two went to the showers, more guards showed up. SCHEISSEN FICK said Klavier. Trucy got up from riding dead dick to shoot guards with her assault rifle.

Guards dropped like flies, coating the entire floor in blood. Trucy shot the dead corpses of the guards so much that the two of them were standing in a few inches of blood.

An intestinal organ drifted past Klavier in the sea of blood. Nigga let's get to the showers to get some of this shit off said Klavier. The two of them went to the showers.

There weren't any prisoners in the showers. Damn no dicks to ride said Trucy. GAY said Klavier. SHUT UP YOU FUCKING FAG said Trucy. Fine cunt whore said Klavier.

As they showered, Klavier saw the soap in Trucy's hands as she was scrubbing her naked body. CAN YOU FUCKING STOP STARING AT ME YOU FUCKING PERVERT said Trucy.

It's not my fault your body is so fucking banging said Klavier. He swatted the soap from her hands. She leaned down and was raped by Klavier. YOU RETARD said Trucy.

While the two of them were in the showers, Seymour Dix was in his headquarters. Nigga I need some more men to kill and rape said Dix. He got a call from some guy first.

What you want said Dix. What's UP mah homie? It's Hugh Jass here, dawg said Jass. Nigga, gimme some of dat coke dawg said Dix. Nigga I don't have that shit said Jass.

FUCK said Dix. How many guards have you slit today said Jass. You better not have grilled their eyeballs again. We're supposed to collect the eyeballs so we can roleplay.

We can't stick eyeballs onto our dicks and play dress up when you're fucking eating up all the eyeballs said Jass. The fuck you're saying, I'm listening to fucking gay porn.

Say that shit again said Dix. Homie, stop eating those eyeballs said Jass. Dude you gotta go into the prison showers. Lots of hot men there to eviscerate and rip out eyes.

Dude that sounds like the shit said Dix. Imma go into the fuckin' showers and rip out some EYES said Dix. He hung up on Jass and went to the showers.

Meanwhile in the Agency, Phoenix had woke up from being knocked unconscious.

THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO ME YOU FUCKING FAGGOT PAYNE said Phoenix. He shot Payne and the other prosecutors. RUN NIGGA said the other prosecutors as they left.

They took the tank and drove back through the house they came in from, this time running over the guy's wife. The fuck just HAPPENED said Athena as she was getting up.

Bitch you aight said Phoenix. No I'm not aight, I feel like fucking shit! They raped my ass harder than Donkey Kong slaps his bongos on the Twin Towers in Africa said Athena.

Nigga I wish I was those homies! I would plow that ass so fucking damn hard! Damn said Phoenix. Well guess what! THEY DESTROYED PART OF THE AGENCY said Athena.

They looked back at it. Half of the entire wall was destroyed. FUCK said Phoenix. We got to get somebody to fix our wall first, before we can even find Apollo said Athena.

Seems legit said Phoenix. He started to smoke a joint and snort cocaine. Athena did the same by rolling up a joint with some leftover cocaine and 420 blazing it to hell.

Meanwhile in the prison, Dix was going towards the showers. Probably some retarded ass niggers in there said Dix.

The fuck said Dix. He saw Klavier and Trucy having naked sex in the prison shower. Dude the fuck is going on here? Eww, straight ass sex! Fucking STRAIGHT said Dix.

The fick are you mein homie said Klavier. You know where some detectives are said Trucy. Bitch I don't know those fags! All I know is that I need to kill some HOT DUDES!

If the two of you niggers have any sanity left, you would know that the best course of action is to get the fuck out before I blow your craniums sky high said Dix with his gun.

OH SHIT said the two. They ran out immediately. FUCK FUCK FUCK said Klavier and Trucy as Dix was shooting at them. We gotta get to the fucking detectives said Trucy.

THE FUCK ARE THOSE TWO RETARDED CUNT NIGGERS said Klavier. The two of them kept running. Wait a minute, what is this? A fucking sawblade and human remains?

Looks like somebody just got sawed in half and their remains eaten for lunch said Trucy. Seems legit said Klavier as he was smoking some meth. Nigga get some shit!

We gotta get some fucking human remains so we can 420 blaze that shit in a fucking joint said Trucy. They started to wrap up the human remains into joints and shit.

As they smoked their joints, they found the prisoner treasure room. Nigga DAMN this grill hits like shit said Fulbright as he was cooking the guard's intestines into patties.

Hey look, some fags came here to see us said Gumshoe. The detectives readied their guns. Homie we're not FICKING guards said Klavier. Dawg, we come in peace said Trucy.

The two detectives immediately started furiously masturbating when they saw who it was. HOLY SHIT THAT'S FUCKING HOT said the detectives. Wait how can you fap?

You don't have a dick anymore said Fulbright. I can fap the hole where my dick used to be said Gumshoe. Makes sense said Fulbright. Damn that ASS said Gumshoe.

Damn those ASSES said Fulbright. I wish I can have a fucking sexy threesome with those two hotties said Fulbright as he admired both Klavier and Trucy's firm ass cheeks.

Dude that guy is hot! But the girl is ugly and straight and ugly said Gumshoe. Damn suit yourself cuntwad said Fulbright. Nigga are you the two detectives said Klavier.

Yeah homie, we used to be detectives and shit. We're in prison now so it's kinda hard to keep being detectives though nigga said Gumshoe. Dude let's get the fuck out!

Some crazy ass faggot is chasing our asses! He's trying to fucking KILL US nigga! Five more minutes and our asses are fucking GRASS said Trucy. Fine cunt said Gumshoe.

As soon as Trucy said that, Dix showed up with some guards. GET THOSE FAGGOTS! LET NONE OF THOSE JEWS SURVIVE said Dix. They shot at the four as they escaped.

FUCKING GET THOSE RETARDS said Dix. FUCK FUCK FUCK said the four as they were escaping. They came across some more guards. Quick! Use the sawblade said Trucy.

Klavier threw the sawblade he found at the guard, slicing him in half. Nigga those intestines look like they would make a fine mcdouble said Fulbright. Yeah said Gumshoe.

The other guards were all massacred by their guns. After they were all killed, the guards from behind started to catch up. FUCK said everybody as they escaped out the door.

They were at the prison entrance now. They turned to leave out the front gate, but some prison tanks were in the way. GOD DAMN IT said Fulbright. Nigga we're fucked!

Wait a minute Klavier said Trucy. I remember a call from Hitler. He said that he got ninjas in helicopters! Call the fucking ninjas to get them to save our fucking asses!

Those fags should fucking come to our rescue, that's why Hitler hired them said Trucy. Fine cunt said Klavier. He called the ninjas.

The detectives were shooting at guards, killing most of them. Every guard they shot was almost immediately replaced with another. The fuck is this shit said Gumshoe.

Oh FINALLY said Klavier and Trucy as the helicopters came. They shot shurikens below at the guards and the tanks. The shurikens clogged up the tank treads and exploded.

GET IN YOU FUCKING NIGGERS said the ninjas. The four of them leapt onto a helicopter, shooting at guards as they flew away. GET BACK HERE! GET BACK! said Dix.

The prison tanks started aiming upwards at the helicopters. They landed a hit on the helicopter! NEIN said Klavier as the helicopter was about to crash.

Klavier, Trucy, Gumshoe, and Fulbright all jumped out of the helicopter as it crashed into a skyscraper, killing everybody inside. It toppled over and crashed into buildings.

What. The. Shit. said the four. Jesus fucking CHRIST nigga what the SHIT just fucking happened said Fulbright. Homie we need to get to a fucking hotel or something!

There isn't fucking ANYTHING to do in this random faggot place said Gumshoe. Oh don't worry! We have just the place said Trucy.

The four of them went to the ghetto. What the fuck is there to do in the fucking ghetto said Gumshoe. All there is here is gay niggers and retarded Jews said Fulbright.

You'll see said Klavier. The four of them went into the tank bunker. Nigga what you WANT nigga said the nigger. DIE YOU FUCKING BLACK NIGGER said Gumshoe.

The detectives massacred all the niggers in the building. We can steal a fucking TANK said Klavier. Dude. That is fucking BOSS said Fulbright. The four of them stole a tank.

As they drove their tank back to the court storehouse, something was happening inside the storehouse! Something they couldn't be prepared for.

To be continued in part 10.


	10. Apollo Escapes the Court

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 10: Apollo Escapes the Court

While Klavier and Trucy were breaking the detectives out of prison, Apollo was still in the court storehouse. FUCK THIS SHIT said Apollo. He looked around and saw some shit.

The fuck is all this shit? said Apollo. He saw the flag with a swastika on it. WHAT THE FUCK said Apollo. IS KLAVIER A NAZI OR SOMETHING said Apollo. German ass fag.

Apollo saw Trucy's coke stash and was tempted to snort it. Damn I wish I was out of these fucking ropes! FUCK! Give me that COKE said Apollo. Apollo looked around again.

Is there fucking ANYTHING I can use to fucking escape this faggot place said Apollo. He started to butt his head against his crotch. FUCK ASS SHIT NIGGER JEW said Apollo.

Apollo started looking around more. Wait is that WHAT I THINK IT IS said Apollo. He started to feel around. Maybe I can get my hand through these fucking ropes said Apollo.

He got his hand out of the ropes and groped around. Oh damn I can finally fap said Apollo. He immediately started to jack off and cum everywhere. Fuck! FUCK said Apollo.

He started to grope around more and grabbed a gun. Damn if my hand wasn't so cummy I would fucking shoot myself said Apollo. Then he got a genius idea.

Wait a minute. There's some court papers over there. If I can shoot the papers, they'll light on fire. When they're on fire, I can light the ropes on fire said Apollo.

Apollo hopped in his chair towards the papers and got some. He shot the papers. Damn why won't these fucking light up said Apollo.

Then he saw some lighter fluid. He doused the paper and ropes in lighter fluid and lit them up. HOLY FUCKING SHIT I FUCKING LIT MYSELF ON FIRE! FUCK said Apollo.

Apollo rolled around on the floor until the fire was put out. The ropes didn't burn all the way. FUCKING SHIT FAGGOT NIGGER CUNT RETARD JEW said Apollo.

Meanwhile, in the court, the judge was leaving after a day of judging. Damn judging sucks ass. Those niggers keep interrupting my fucking fapping sessions said the judge.

I should be able to fucking fap to furry hentai in peace, without those cunty lawyers to interrupt my fucking dick stroking said the judge. Damn I need some coffee, he said.

The judge got his coffee and chugged it. There's still some fucking brain chunks in this coffee from last time said the judge. That fucking kicks ass nigga said the judge.

Fuck! I fucking need more hentai to fap to! Where did I leave my porn magazines? I had a huge ass porn stash stored somewhere said the judge as he chugged coffee.

Old ass fuck said the bailiff. How about you fucking go to the fucking court storehouse you fucking nigger said the bailiff. Nigga that's a good idea dawg, homie said the judge.

Damn it my coffee is empty! Fuck said the judge. He got into his car. Immediately after he got in his car, ninjas shot out his tires, making him spill his coffee everywhere.

GODDAMN IT! WHO THE FUCK DID THIS SHIT said the judge angrily. He got out his gun in his car and started shooting the ninjas. DIE YOU FUCKING CUNTS said the judge.

The ninjas shot shurikens at the judge. FUCK said the judge. A shuriken flew right past his chin, slicing his entire beard off. FUCK said the judge again. He shot more ninjas.

RETREAT! THIS FAGGOT KEEPS KILLING OUR ASSES said the ninjas. That's RIGHT said the judge as he shot the retreating ninjas, killing them all.

A truck carrying some gasoline ran over one of the ninja corpses, spilling gasoline everywhere. The judge ran far away. Then he shot the truck, causing it to explode.

The explosion set the gasoline on fire, setting the entire courthouse on fire. Fucking shit said the judge. The judge ran to the court storehouse, which hadn't been damaged.

Nigga this fucking thing is locked! The fuck? Fuck it! said the judge. He shot the lock off the door and it opened. Where the FUCK ARE MY PORN MAGS said the judge.

The fuck was that said Apollo. IT BETTER NOT BE THOSE FUCKING FAGGOTS said Apollo. The judge came in. Why the fuck is everything burnt said the judge.

NIGGA LET ME FUCKING GO YOU OLD ASS FUCK said Apollo. Dude just let me have my fucking porn magazines! WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY said the judge to Apollo.

Nigga I don't FUCKING KNOW! JUST LET ME OUT said Apollo. Fucking FINE said the judge. He shot off Apollo's ropes. Fucking FINALLY said Apollo.

Also, what the fuck is your actual fucking name, old ass fag? Better not be something gay like Jessica or something said Apollo. Oh, it's The Judge said Judge. The fuck?

I know you're the judge, what's your motherfuckin' name said Apollo. Homie, it's The Judge. You know my brother? He's That Judge. There's also my other fucking brother.

He's Khura'in Judge. He went there for vacation one day, and liked it so much he changed his name to Khura'in and decided to judge shit over there. Fucking retarded Jew.

First name The, last name Judge. It's a gay ass fucking name said Judge. Wow, I don't give a flying shit said Apollo. I'm fucking free as fuck said Apollo.

Apollo started to steal shit from the storehouse, like a random gun. You better not be killing people with that gun said the judge. You know what you old ass fucking nigger?

He shot the judge in the ballsack. The judge fell over. YOU FUCKING JEW ASS CUNT said the judge. Apollo stole his porn stash. This your hentai mags? They're mine now.

THE FUCK YOU DOING WITH THOSE FUCKING MAGAZINES said the judge. Oh nothing said Apollo. He doused them in lighter fluid and lit them on fire. YOU FUCKING FAG!

THOSE WERE MY FUCKING PORN MAGAZINES! I'VE HAD THEM FOR THIRTY YEARS YOU FUCKING NIGGER! I'LL KILL YOU said the judge. Apollo shot the judge in the head.

Fucking old man was at the end of his life anyway. Cunt retard Jew said Apollo. He continued to steal shit. The fuck just happened said the judge.

Oh I don't know, I just fucking SHOT YOUR STUPID ASS said Apollo. HOW THE FUCK IS YOUR ASS ALIVE YOU OLD RETARD said Apollo. I'm fucking immortal, nigger.

I've died so many fucking times, I just fucking get used to it said the judge. So that's why you've been judge for an entire century and WON'T FUCKING DIE said Apollo.

The judge took back what was left of his porn magazines and shot Apollo in the dick. FUCKING ASS SHIT JEW said Apollo. Apollo stole the rest of the shit and left.

Fuck! I don't have a fucking car said Apollo. I'll just fucking steal one said Apollo as he looked at the traffic. Apollo shot up a guy in a random car and climbed in the window.

He stole the car and drove it away. Nigga the thug life hits the fucking shit said Apollo as he started to smoke some stolen weed.

Meanwhile, Klavier, Trucy, and the detectives were driving in their tank and shooting shit. Nigga this coke hits the shit! Haven't smoked cocaine in forever said Gumshoe.

Nigga shut the fuck up said Fulbright. He was fapping to some porn. Trucy you see the ficken storehouse anywhere? I'm fucking hungering for some meth said Klavier.

Look you fucking nigger, I'm feeling a little horny tonight. You'll have to fuck me. Just make sure to wear a condom, you fucking perverted ass nigger said Trucy.

You didn't wear one last time and I almost got AIDS. Fucking retard said Trucy. Nigga I can't help that I have HIV in my blood you ficken scheissen said Klavier. Bitch.

Can you shut the fuck UP said Gumshoe as he was high. Kill yourself you retarded ass cunt said Trucy. Oh nigga the fuck is that? The court's ON FIRE said the detectives.

OH SCHEISSEN NIGGA said Klavier. The storehouse better not be fucking nuked and shit said Trucy. Some niggers walked in front of their fucking retarded asses.

Nigga, wanna get some KFC fried chikkin' home slice? Gangsta nigga dawg homie get some watermelon slices too said the nigger. The niggers were run over by the tank.

What the FUCK happened to the storehouse said Klavier as he got to the storehouse. Dawg, this place looks gay as shit from the fucking door said Gumshoe.

Oh, how about your fucking faggot ass shut the fuck up like your fucking MOM said Trucy. She shot Gumshoe in the arm. FUCK YOU FUCKING BITCH WHORE said Gumshoe.

Fulbright walked in. Der FICK HAPPENED HERE said Klavier. MY FICKEN PORN STASH IS GONE! FUCKING SCHEISSEN NIGGA said Klavier. Homie this looks gay said Fulbright.

Yeah this place is fucking burnt and shit's gone fucking insane and I'm fucking snorting some fucking meth said Gumshoe as he was too high on LSD and meth to think.

Shut up retard said Trucy. Wait, Apollo's FUCKING GONE said Klavier. THAT FAGGOT ESCAPED? FUCKING CUNT ASS NIGGER said Trucy as she took a hit of cocaine.

We gotta find that fucking retard before Hitler calls our ass! If we don't have that fag we're fucking FUCKED up the ass said Klavier. Nigga said Gumshoe as he was high.

Dude APOLLO WAS HERE? That fucking nigga has a 14 inch dick and fucks my ass like a fucking bulldog! I want his BIG ASS DICK SO BAD said Gumshoe.

He couldn't have gone far. Probably in the ghetto. He likes to fucking rap like a gangsta and go smoke dope with his homies in the hood after all said Trucy.

Nigga let's go to the fucking ghetto and find that faggot. Kill some fucking niggers too. Fucking gay ass black niggers said Fulbright. Oh and we should fuck him too.

The fuck is going to drive this giant ass fucking tank said Gumshoe. Nigga I'll do it. I fucking drive tanks all the fucking time and kill niggers with blasts said Fulbright.

The four of them got back in their tank and went to the ghetto. They ran over some niggers. We better watch out. We're on the Nigger Watch List or the NWL.

We're fucking number one on that thing. If we go in there and kill some fucking niggers, they'll get their niggers and throw fried chicken at us said Gumshoe as he was high.

Nigga aight said Fulbright as he was snorting crack. Mein homies, we better find Apollo before der Fuehrer finds us said Klavier. Fag, we're FINDING HIM said Trucy.

The four of them were going, killing more niggers until they found another tank. The fuck is another tank doing around these parts said Gumshoe. Probably killing niggers.

Niggers drop like fucking flies in this retarded ass fucking place said Klavier. Just fucking move that fucking thing gently past the fucking tank said Trucy to Fulbright.

Nigga fine you fucking hoe ass bitch said Fulbright. He tried to move the tank past the other tank, but hit the side of the other tank's treads. The fuck was that said Trucy.

Uh FUCK! I hit the other FUCKING tank said Fulbright. Somebody got out of the tank. It was Edgeworth. The fuck just happened? Some retards you are said Edgeworth.

Seriously, it's that red suited cunt faggot said Klavier. Faggot won't let me in his fucking cool prosecutor gang! Nigger! said Klavier. We gotta go up and fight that cunt!

Somebody get up and start fucking fighting that nigger said Gumshoe. FINE said Klavier. Klavier got up out of the tank. The fuck is your PROBLEM said Edgeworth.

Nigga. I'll ask you one last fucking time. Let me into your. Fucking. Prosecutor. Club. You. Fucking. JEW. said Klavier. How about I let you into something else said Edgeworth.

What's that said Klavier. My fucking ballsack said Edgeworth. He shot Klavier in the ass. FUCKING ASS SHIT CUNT said Klavier. Edgeworth got back into the tank.

Homie deploy the fucking battering ram on their fucking asses said Edgeworth to Blackquill. Nigga the fuck does that shit said Blackquill as he was high on rubbing alcohol.

It's the fucking black button said Edgeworth. Eww, black. Fucking nigger button said Blackquill. PRESS THAT SHIT said Edgeworth. FINE said Blackquill as he pressed it.

The battering ram came out and smashed into the side of the other tank. The other tank started spinning and crashed into a wall. FUCK FUCK FUCK said the others.

MOTHERFUCKING CUNT said Trucy. The tank's fucking destroyed as shit said Fulbright. The four of them got out and were immediately shot at by the prosecutors.

Fuck ass shit nigger cunt Jew retard faggot said Gumshoe. The four of them got into a corner. We gotta fucking find a way to escape from these cunt ass niggers said Trucy.

Nigga we can fucking go to the gay ass shopping mall over there! said Klavier. Nigga, nobody goes to that faggot place anymore said Trucy. It's deserted as shit, retard!

Fag, I don't fucking care if the fucking thing's closing down or whatever. We're going in there and taking no prisoners said Klavier. Fine you fucking cunt ass Jew said Trucy.

The four of them took some additional shots at the prosecutors. Fuck why won't these fags DIE said Godot. He started to chug some coffee and get high on coffee grains.

Look! They're FUCKING GOING IN THE FUCKING SHOPPING MALL said Payne. Why the fuck is there a shopping mall in a fucking ghetto said Edgeworth.

It's probably the white part of the ghetto. Only white people go to fucking malls anyway, privileged whites said Blackquill. Makes sense said Payne as he snorted cocaine.

The stoned prosecutors got out of their tank and chased the Nazis into the white ghetto mall with their assault rifles.

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUUCCCCCK said Klavier as he tried to find a hiding spot. He went in the girls' bathroom. Damn where are all the hot chicks said Klavier.

Trucy went into the boys' bathroom. I'll hide in the urinal. That way, if a hot guy pulls his pants down to piss, he'll put his dick right where my mouth is so I can suck his dick.

She hid in the urinal. FUCKING NIGGER said Gumshoe. The fuck we gonna hide said Fulbright. The only place we know where to hide said Gumshoe. They went to the KFC.

Nigga let's get some fucking fried chicken dawg said Gumshoe. But nigga there's nobody here said Fulbright. Yeah, there's NOBODY here said Gumshoe. Get. Some. Chicken.

The two of them snuck behind the counters to the fryers. Homie, there's some leftover chicken in there! Let's GET IT said Fulbright. The two of them started eating chicken.

The prosecutors walked into the mall. Fuck, there's no fucking niggers to shoot said Edgeworth. Remember nigger that this is a fucking white mall said Godot.

But why would there be a KFC in a fucking white mall? You'd think it would be a fucking Mcdonalds or something, fucking black ass shit said Edgeworth.

First of all, let's finish off these fucking Jews said Blackquill. The prosecutors started shooting everybody that they saw, killing everyone in the mall except for the Nazis.

Nigga I got to take a fucking piss said Payne. Then go to the fucking bathroom you fucking cunt ass retard said Blackquill. Fine you stupid nigger said Payne as he left.

Finally that fag's fucking gone said Edgeworth. Nigga, we gotta go to the fucking Mcdonalds said Godot. No, we gotta go to the fucking KFC said Blackquill. No, the Mcdonalds!

We're going to get some Mcdoubles said Godot. No, the KFC said Blackquill. MCDONALDS! KFC! MCDONALDS! KFC! Mc shut the fuck up said Edgeworth. We're not going!

We go to the fucking girls' bathroom and fuck some hot cunts said Edgeworth. But I thought we killed everyone said Blackquill. Not the girls in the bathroom said Edgeworth.

Fine you fucking cunt said Godot. The three of them went into the girls' bathroom. Meanwhile, in the KFC, Gumshoe and Fulbright were high on greasy, fatty KFC chicken.

Damn why do fucking black niggers have to hog all the fucking chicken? This shit slaps said Gumshoe. I know nigga. FUCK! We ate all the chicken, dumb fuck said Fulbright.

We gotta get the fuck out of here said Gumshoe. No, you fucking retard! If we leave, those cunts will find us and we'll be fucking dead said Fulbright.

But we gotta go to the Subway and get a 12 inch foot long. Man I can always go for a footlong, if you know what I mean, wink wink said Gumshoe. Fine dipshit said Fulbright.

The two of them watched outside and saw Edgeworth, Blackquill, and Godot walking towards the girls' bathroom. Nigga they'll be gone soon. We gotta get to the Subway!

In the boys' bathroom, Payne walked in. He looked at the mirror first. Damn I'm looking sexy as fuck! That hair is fucking long and flows in the wind! I'm looking kinda thick.

Not gonna lie, I'd tap that ass so fucking hard. He started to fap to his reflection. The fuck is this retarded ass nigger doing said Trucy. Payne fapped and came seven times.

Damn, all that cum is making me have to piss. Imma go take a fucking leak said Payne. Meanwhile in the girls' bathroom, the prosecutors walked in.

The fuck? There aren't any girls here said Edgeworth. He opened some of the stalls, and found Klavier in one of them. FUCK said Klavier as he fled the girls' bathroom.

He was shot in the leg on his way out. He limped out.

As Payne took his leak, Trucy put her mouth on his wrinkly, shriveled up tiny dick. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT A GIRL? HOLY SHIT said Payne. He shot at her. FUCK said Trucy.

Trucy fled the bathroom. WHERE ARE THE DETECTIVES said Klavier.

Damn is that Klavier and Trucy said Fulbright. Dude let's get some Subway with those cunts said Gumshoe. The two of them joined up with Klavier and Trucy.

The fuck are you two retards running away for said the detectives. NIGGA NO TIME TO EXPLAIN! WE NEED TO FIND A BETTER HIDING SPOT said Klavier.

The four of them hid in the Subway. Nigga, the fuck should we do said Fulbright. I got an idea said Gumshoe. Those fags were the Walmart killers, right said Gumshoe.

If we call the cops on them and get them arrested, we'll be free of them forever said Gumshoe. That's a genius idea said Fulbright as he called 911.

Nigga, the FUCK did those four cuntwads go said Godot. Homie, we should go back to the tank and get our nukes. That's the only way to kill those fags said Blackquill.

FREEZE! PUT YOUR FUCKING HANDS IN THE AIR AND GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND said the cops. Oh. Shit. said the prosecutors. There were a metric ton of fucking cops.

There were so many cops that the four of them were arrested. FUCK ASS SHIT NIGGER JEW said the prosecutors as they were taken away to the detention center.

To be continued.


	11. The Investigation

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 11: The Investigation

FUCK! LET GO OF MY SEXY ASS said Payne as he was arrested. Edgeworth shot at the cops but he was disarmed and couldn't shoot anymore. FUCK MY ASS said Edgeworth.

YES NIGGA! WE FUCKING GOT THE PROSECUTORS! YES NIGGA said the four as they celebrated. They walked out of the Subway.

Fucking ja ja JA said Klavier. Those fags are going to the fucking prison and rotting in HELL said Fulbright. Wait a minute. They only go to prison if they're guilty said Trucy.

Oh wait. I just realized too. What if they're found innocent? FUCK! I DIDN'T THINK THIS THROUGH said Fulbright. Homie, dawg, we've done this shit before said Gumshoe.

Oh right. I remember that fucking trial. That shit slapped. Except for the part where the prosecutors killed our ninjas. Fucking nigger ass faggot retard Jews said Fulbright.

Fuck those fucking stupid prosecuting ass fags said Trucy. Wait eine minute said Klavier. I'm a prosecutor. What if we take their case and find them guilty said Klavier.

Nigga that idea slaps like my hand on your mom's ass said Fulbright. Okay so let's huddle in a circle and plan shit out. Don't say anything too loudly because of spoilers.

The four of them got in a circle in the mall and planned out their trial.

Meanwhile, in the Wright Anything Agency, Phoenix and Athena were watching Spongebob and smoking weed. Damn the weed hits best when you're watching Spongebob.

Seeing Patrick slice Squidward's tentacles off while gagging his mouth is a lot more fun when you're stoned off your ass Phoenix said Athena.

Yeah said Phoenix as he grabbed some meth and injected it into his arm. FUCK that meth hits the SPOT said Phoenix. Phoenix was so high that he started to masturbate.

As Patrick started to saw Squidward's head off with a chainsaw, the news interrupted the show. Fuck why do they always have to interrupt the best part screamed Athena.

Four men, Miles Edgeworth, Simon Blackquill, some coffee visor guy called Godot, and Winston Gay have been arrested for committing mass murder at the Walmart.

All four of them are currently being detained in the detention center, awaiting their trial said the news guy. What the FUCK said Phoenix as he was blowing some dope.

THEY ARRESTED THE FUCKING PROSECUTORS said Athena. We need to get to the detention center so we can defend those fucking retarded faggots said Phoenix.

Also I thought his name was Winston PAYNE, not Winston Gay. Dumbass news guy said Athena. SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING WHORE AND LET'S GO said Phoenix.

The two of them went up to the front of their house where they saw the wall repairman. Nigga you fucking done yet said Phoenix. Dude how about you fucking shut up.

I'm working on your fucking wall as hard as I can, you fucking retarded ass lawyer Jew said the repairman. Fucking stupid ass faggot said Athena.

Wait, how the fuck do we get to the fucking detention center without a fucking TANK said Athena. Bitch, we have a fucking car. Dumb ass whore cunt said Phoenix.

Phoenix and Athena got in their car. They started driving, smoking weed, and shooting black people. Thug life dawg said Phoenix as he massacred black people in his car.

A bomb was planted on their car by some black people. OH SHIT said Athena. She jumped out of the car and rolled on the pavement, shooting niggers as she fell down.

Phoenix was in the car when it blew up, sending him flying. He landed right next to the detention center. How convenient said Phoenix who had blood dripping everywhere.

Wait for me you fucking Jew said Athena. She was captured by black people and you can guess what they did to her.

Phoenix got in the room with the four prosecutors and started to question them. What's up, mah niggas? How be yo nigga asses doin' in this nigga hood said Phoenix.

The fuck is this said Edgeworth. Nigga mah homie, dawg said Phoenix. Oh, it's you. Wright. How about you do me a favor and fucking jump off a cliff, Edgeworth said to him.

Dude this lawyer fag looks like a fucking RETARD said Payne. Shut the fuck up said Phoenix. I'm here to take your fucking case said Phoenix. Nigga the fuck said Blackquill.

We don't need your nigger ass defending our sexy asses said Godot as he chugged prison coffee. Fucking SHIT said Phoenix. The fuck can I do to make me defend you?

Then Athena came in, red, panting, and with cum all over her body. DAMN said Edgeworth. That is a tight, thick ass said Blackquill. Where the cum come from said Godot.

It's a long ass story said Athena. Oh shit if she's the defense, we'll fucking get her to "defend" our dicks so fucking hard that we cum on her face and ass said Edgeworth.

I'm not letting your gay asses rape her said Phoenix. Shut the fuck up you fucking Jew. Didn't you want to defend our fucking asses said Blackquill. Yes homie said Phoenix.

Then let that cunt suck our dicks in court and we'll let you defend us said Godot. Fuck let me take a hit off my blunt first said Phoenix. He started to smoke his weed.

If you're going to fucking rape me I'm not going to fucking defend you, you fucking nigger ass Jew fags said Athena. Bitch the fuck said Edgeworth as he was fapping to her.

Then Godot got out a gun and pointed it at Phoenix. If you don't fucking defend us, we'll murder your ass and pin the blame on the yellow ass cunt said Godot threateningly.

Isn't there fucking GLASS in the detention center said Phoenix. Yeah and we'll fucking shoot it out and blind your eyes so you bleed out and die on the floor said Payne.

Fine you fucking Jews said Athena. I've been fucking raped a million times already. Cunt ass retard fag Jew nigger said Athena. Fucking SHIT! Why did we defend these fags?

All these fucking cunts do is threaten our asses and waste our time said Phoenix. I don't give a shit said Edgeworth. Fine let's fucking leave said Phoenix. Damn said Athena.

The two of them left. As they left, Godot shot the glass, breaking it. One massive glass shard landed in Phoenix's ass, penetrating it and spilling blood. FUCK said Phoenix.

Nigga I always wanted Phoenix's ass to be penetrated said Payne as he started to fap to Phoenix's bloody ass. Kill yourself you fucking fag said Athena as she flipped him off.

The two of them left the detention center. Nigga we didn't ask about the fucking CRIME said Phoenix. Dude it's past closing time for the center! We can't ask those retards!

We'll have to ask the fucking prosecutor and shit about the case said Athena. Listen Athena, the fuck shit you on? The prosecution won't reveal anything to the defense!

If we go to the fucking prosecutor and ask them about the trial we'll probably be shot or something said Phoenix. You're fucking right, let's go anyway said Athena.

Of course I'm Wright, that's my fucking name said Phoenix. Motherfucker, you already made that joke, Jew said Athena. The two of them went to the prosecutors' office.

Wait a minute Phoenix. If the prosecutors are in jail, then who can prosecute this case said Athena. I don't fucking know, some faggot probably will said Phoenix.

They went to the prosecutors' office. Damn homie there's basically nobody here said Athena. Then they saw somebody talking. The fuck is saying that shit said Phoenix.

Oh JA said the prosecutor. Make sure to get der chicken mcnuggets for der Fuehrer. He wants no apple slices and a boy's toy said the prosecutor. It was Klavier!

Oh shit it's Klavier. I recognize that German accent anywhere said Athena. Who in the holy name of Jesus Christ is that motherfucking German ass fag talking to said Phoenix.

Nigga where the fuck is the Mcdonalds said Gumshoe over the phone. I don't ficken' know! Look around for one! You have eyes, you fucking schnitzel said Klavier.

Schnitzel? The fuck does that mean said Gumshoe. It means retard in German, dumbass fag said Klavier. Wow, you don't have to be such a fucking nigger said Gumshoe.

The fuck is going on in that gay ass office. Klavier's probably calling one of his gay partners to come to his house and buttfuck him. Gay ass retarded German fag said Athena.

Nigga, get the fucking Mcdonalds or I'll slit your gay ass detective throat said Klavier. He hung up on Gumshoe. Fucking black ass fags have to be so fucking gay said Klavier.

Oh shit he's leaving said Phoenix. The two of them left the hallway. Klavier walked out and towards the stairs.

Klavier saw Edgeworth's office. That gave him an idea. He walked in. Wow, this place looks gay as shit said Klavier. He saw a spare Edgeworth suit, cravat, and glasses there.

Damn, this fag has to leave his shit here. Imma take some of his fucking weed and his meth and get the fuck out. Don't need this gay ass clothing said Klavier.

Klavier took some stuff, stuffed it in a bag, and left Edgeworth's office. Phoenix and Athena saw the whole thing from outside Klavier's office. The fuck he's doing said Athena.

Oh, he's leaving said Phoenix. The two of them went into Klavier's office. Wow, this place looks gay as shit said Phoenix. They started investigating. Look at this shit.

It's a swastika. Klavier's a fucking Nazi, I knew it said Athena. Damn bitch, look at all this fucking hot meth he has. I just want to inject it all so FUCKING BAD said Phoenix.

Phoenix immediately started injecting some of Klavier's meth. Better not take too much or he'll notice said Athena. Damn! DAMN! This shit HITS said Phoenix as he was high.

Fuck it said Athena as she started snorting some of Klavier's cocaine stash. The two of them were so high that they got distracted from their investigation.

Meanwhile in the court storehouse, Gumshoe and the others had finished calling Klavier. Damn nigga this coke hits the spot said Fulbright. I know right said Gumshoe.

How about you two faggots fucking stop snorting crack and go get some Mcdonalds said Trucy. Shut the fuck up you fucking cunt said Gumshoe.

Bitch I'm not gay! I'm bisexual! I'll stick my dick in whatever's in my way. Including you said Fulbright. He undressed Trucy and started to rape her. YOU NIGGER said Trucy.

Wow this is straight as shit said Gumshoe. How the fuck am I going to fap to this fucking bullfuck said Gumshoe. He left the storehouse and took the tank to Mcdonalds.

Damn nigga Imma shoot some black ass faggots said Gumshoe. He shot at black people and killed Jews while driving to Mcdonalds. These fags suck nigger ass said Gumshoe.

Oh damn there's a Mcdonalds there said Gumshoe. As he said that, the tank got off balance from running over so many people. FUCKING SHIT ASS NIGGER said Gumshoe.

The tank tipped over, spilling some oil onto the ground. Gumshoe leapt out of the tank as it crashed into the Mcdonalds. The explosion and oil set the entire Mcdonalds on fire.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK I STILL NEED TO GET HITLER'S MCDONALDS said Gumshoe. He went into the burning Mcdonalds.

Gumshoe had to tear the flex tape off of the door before entering. The TV and wall were shot, and there were corpses everywhere. I WANT A HAPPY MEAL WITH MCNUGGETS!

Don't get me a girl toy, those are for fags! No apple slices either! Oh and get me 420 extra mcnuggets because 420 is a funny number said Gumshoe to the cashier.

DUDE THE FUCKING BUILDING IS ON FIRE YOU FUCKING CUNT said the cashier. GIVE ME MY FUCKING MCNUGGETS YOU FUCKING JEW said Gumshoe to the cashier.

FINE YOU FUCKING NIGGER! HERE'S YOUR FUCKING HAPPY MEAL! 420 MCNUGGETS, NO APPLE SLICES, AND A FUCKING BOY'S TOY! YOU FUCKING HAPPY said the cashier.

Immediately a beam fell off the building from burning, and it crushed the cashier and killed him. The happy meal landed in Gumshoe's hands. YES NIGGA said Gumshoe.

Didn't even have to pay for this fucking shit since the cashier fucking died from the fucking building collapsing said Gumshoe. He ran out of the building, just in time.

The Mcdonalds collapsed and burst into more flames, burning down to the ground. It exploded, sending debris flying into nearby buildings and destroying them.

Damn look at all that collateral damage said Gumshoe as he watched buildings be destroyed and people dying. He saw a couple and their baby get crushed by falling debris.

LOL THOSE FUCKING LOSERS GOT THEIR ASSES KILLED said Gumshoe. He was in so much hysterics that he couldn't think straight. Wait how the FUCK am I going to leave?

The fucking tank got destroyed and burned the Mcdonalds down said Gumshoe. He got out a gun and stole a guy's car. Then he drove back to the court storehouse.

In the court storehouse, Fulbright was so busy raping Trucy that he didn't notice Gumshoe driving into the storehouse. WHAT THE FUCK said Fulbright as he was hit.

Damn nigga you aight bro said Gumshoe. Fulbright was bleeding everywhere. Nigga homie get me some fucking bandaids you fucking retarded Jew said Fulbright as he bled.

LOL YOU SAID AIDS said Gumshoe. SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING FAGGOT said Fulbright. Goddamn it I'll get them said Trucy as she still had buckets of cum in her.

Five more seconds later, Klavier came in. What's in the sack said Gumshoe. Mein homie, I robbed Edgeworth's schnitzel ass like I robbed your fucking mom's ass said Klavier.

I got some fucking drugs and shit. Want some fucking meth said Klavier. Gimme some of dat shit mah homie said Gumshoe as he snorted some meth with Klavier's ass.

Nigga can't you fucking see I'M BLEEDING MY ASS OUT OVER HERE! HELP MY FUCKING ASS SO I DON'T FUCKING DIE said Fulbright. Trucy came back with some bandaids.

I have some fucking bandaids for your gay rapist ass said Trucy. LOL SHE SAID AIDS said Gumshoe. Shut UP said Trucy as she applied the bandaids onto Fulbright's wounds.

Nigga, did you fucking get Hitler's fucking Mcdonalds said Klavier. Oh shit yeah said Gumshoe. I may have sat on it for a fucking long time though said Gumshoe.

It was all smushed up and squished. NEIN! Gott DAMN it Gumshoe, can you do ANYTHING FICKEN RIGHT DU SCHEISSFICKEN said Klavier. He shot Gumshoe in the ass.

Fine you fucking nigger! I'm going to mail this fucking Mcdonalds to Hitler in Germany so he gets his fucking happy meal. You better hold on to your balls said Klavier.

Meanwhile in the prosecutors' office, Phoenix and Athena were high as shit. Damn what's that said Phoenix. He got out a document of Klavier's.

Phoenix, what the fuck is that fucking thing SAYING said Athena. OH MY HOLY SHIT. It's a list of certain people said Phoenix. Huh, they all sound gay and Jewish said Athena.

Wait a MINUTE said Phoenix. These people actually ARE gay and Jewish! Have you seen any of these fags lately said Athena. I haven't! They must have DIED said Phoenix.

He must have been killing off gays and Jews for their religion because he's a Nazi said Phoenix. Oh my god you're RIGHT said Athena. Of course, I'm Wright said Phoenix.

Stop making that fucking joke, it isn't funny anymore. I'm not laughing said Athena. Fucking unfunny ass hoe said Phoenix. They saw some more shit in the fucking drawer.

Dude, what the fuck is this? It looks like a porn magazine said Athena. Wait a minute said Phoenix. Some of the letters are cut out. Let's see.

There's the K. An I. Two Ls. One Y. An O. Looks like a U. R. S. E. L. F said Phoenix. Another Y. O. U. N. I. Two Gs. E. R said Athena. Wait a minute, what does that spell?

Kill yourself you nigger said Athena. Wow, how about you fucking rot in hell, you cunt ass bitch? I'm no fucking nigger said Phoenix. No, I mean what it spells!

It fucking spells Kill yourself you nigger! We got fucking TROLLED by Klavier said Athena. FUCKING DAMN IT! He knew we were here and set up a trap for us said Phoenix.

The two of them left the prosecutors' office but then saw some faggots having gay sex. They shot down the faggots before leaving.

God DAMN IT! Where was the crime scene again said Phoenix as he was driving and snorting crack. Dude it's at the fucking Walmart. Remember the news said Athena.

Bitch I'm fucking high as shit I can't fucking drive straight said Phoenix. Phoenix was so high he crashed the car into a group of people, exploding and killing all of them.

The explosion propulsed the attorneys onto the concrete. The explosion displaced the shard of glass from Phoenix's ass. HOLY SHIT said Phoenix.

The shock of the glass coming out gave Phoenix an idea. Athena. We shouldn't go investigate the crime scene. We could give the prosecution evidence against the case!

If we let Klavier win the case, the prosecutors are guilty and we lose said Phoenix. Are you serious? We just came all this fucking WAY FOR NOTHING said Athena.

Then Athena fell back onto the floor. Blood was everywhere. HOLY SHIT said Athena as her wounds opened up. The two of them hobbled to the local Walgreens first.

Give me some of that fucking bandaids said Phoenix. And you better NOT say AIDS! That isn't funny! said Athena. Fine said the counter guy as he gave them their bandaids.

Jesus FINALLY said the attorneys. They applied their bandaids and walked out of the hospital. Lol he said AIDS said the counter guy as they left. Phoenix shot and killed him.

Fuck! We don't have a fucking car said Phoenix. Let me handle this said Athena. She went up to a nearby car and shot the window open and the driver in the head.

She stole the car and drove it back to the Walgreens. Get the fuck in you fucking lawyer ass Jew said Athena. Lol Athena this car looks fucking gay as shit said Phoenix.

Goddamn it! If we can't investigate the fucking crime scene, then what the fuck should we do said Phoenix in the car. Let's just get some fucking sleep for now said Athena.

You're right Athena said Phoenix as he drove towards the agency. As he drove, he accidentally drove over one of the corpses from the first crash.

The car tumbled and flew into the agency, where it exploded and blew up another hole in the wall. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS said Phoenix as he jumped out of the car.

Athena jumped out of the car after Phoenix. Fucking SHIT said Athena. Call the fucking wall repairman before we fucking get any sleep said Phoenix.

Meanwhile, in the ghetto, Apollo was cruising and shooting black people. Kill the fucking niggers said Apollo. He had some KFC from before. Take this KFC said Apollo.

He threw chicken strips and wings at the black people, and their car swerved into another black car and exploded both cars, killing everyone inside both vehicles.

Nigga I hate black people so much. So fucking niggardly and shit said Apollo. He drove up to a random street corner. Do you got the good stuff said Apollo.

Oh yeah, I have the good stuff said the guy Apollo was talking to. Yeah nigga give it to me said Apollo.

To be continued in part 12.


	12. Apollo's Revenge

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 12: Apollo's Revenge

It was the night before the trial.

The guy who Apollo met was a white drug dealer in the ghetto. You want some meth, weed, some acid, or some of that good stuff? I got that shit nigga said the guy.

Nigga, give me some of that good shit said Apollo. Dude, the fuck you've been lately said the guy. Nigga, I've been doing some shit dawg. Also, who the fuck are you?

I've never seen your retarded faggot ass anywhere in my fucking life said Apollo. Tyrese, nigga, you're getting really sexy when you talk, nigga. Yo ass is sexy said the guy.

Gaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy said Apollo as he was smoking some weed. Homie, dawg, we gonna get some KFC chickin' or not, T money said the guy.

Shut the fuck up! SHUT UP! I don't care what you say! SHUT THE FUCK UP said Apollo. Racist! Privileged cracka, black lives MATTER! Black lives matter said the guy.

You're not even fucking black, you white ass Jew said Apollo. The guy brought out a knife and stabbed Apollo. How about that you fuckin' white trash said the guy to Apollo.

Apollo looked around and found a chainsaw. EAT MY ASS said Apollo as he sawed the guy's foot off. OH SHIT NIGGA said the guy. He dropped his knife, then fell over.

The guy fell right on top of his knife, stabbing him right in the eye. FUCK MY EYE said the guy. The guy was screaming as his leg and eye were bleeding all over the ground.

Apollo pulled the knife from out of his eye, then stabbed the guy right in the ballsack. HOLY FUCKING SHIT said the guy. Then Apollo took the chainsaw right to his head.

The chainsaw sawed the guy's head in half, spraying blood, guts, and brain matter all over the building and ground. Fuck! I got fucking brains on my shoes! Goddamn it!

I fucking paid $500 for those fucking kicks! That fucking retarded ass nigger just HAD to fucking spill his brain matter RIGHT ON MY FUCKING SHOES said Apollo.

As soon as he said that, some niggers came by. Fucking black ass niggers said Apollo. Wait a minute. I got some KFC chicken an hour ago. I can throw the bucket to them.

Hey cunts! Want some KFC said Apollo as he threw the bucket of fried chicken to the blacks. They were distracted trying to eat the chicken as Apollo escaped the building.

FUCK! FUCK! HOLY FUCKING SHIT NIGGA I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT WORKED said Apollo. As soon as he said that he was shot at by some more black people. FUCK said Apollo.

Apollo went to hide in the nearest bank. Damn I wish I could rob this fucking thing but niggers are chasing me said Apollo. Then he had a gun to his back.

The fuck you want nigga said Apollo as he turned around to face his potential killer. Dude it's your nigga, Harry Weiner said Harry Weiner. Wait a minute. Harry Weiner?

I don't know who the fuck you are but I need some extra fucking firepower said Apollo. Harry got behind the counter and pulled out some assault rifles. Get some said Harry.

Apollo got out an assault rifle and started shooting at some niggers through the window. Harry started to rob the bank and stole a lot of money. Damn, that's some stacks.

Get some for me, nigga said Apollo. He took a break from shooting to smoke some meth. As soon as he did, one of the niggers' shots hit his pipe, exploding it in his face.

FUCKING SHIT said Apollo. He was so pissed off that he threw a grenade out at the niggers, blowing some of them into pieces. GET REKT said Apollo as he shot their bodies.

A nigger got through the window. WATCH OUT HOMIE said Harry. Harry tackled the nigger and shot his dick off. Then Harry stabbed the nigger in the ass.

He got a crowbar and pried the nigger's head open until the top of his head snapped off of the black person's jaw, causing his head top to split off from the rest of his body.

The sheer force of the head coming off flew the head up to the ceiling fan, where it was shredded into pieces. Said pieces began to cover the entire bank in blood and guts.

FUCK MY LIFE said Apollo. Then the niggers immediately started to drop dead. Shurikens flew into their heads, killing them instantly.

WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT said Harry. The attackers came into the bank through the window. Wait a minute. THOSE ARE NINJAS said Apollo.

Five hours earlier, at the court storehouse, Gumshoe was getting high on acid again. Nigga I feel like I'm in another world said Gumshoe. Dude me too said Fulbright.

Homies, we need to get prepared for our fucking trial said Klavier. Get the fucking evidence and shit ready, gay ass detectives said Klavier. Wait a minute said Trucy.

We haven't fucking found Apollo yet! How the fuck can we fucking do this gay trial? Apollo's still out there! HE COULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY! You DUMBASSES said Trucy.

He already got away said Klavier. Wait a minute said Gumshoe. FUCKING APOLLO? That dude is sexy as shit! Such a massive, long dong! Fucking HOT as shit said Fulbright.

Nigga, I want that fucking COCK so bad said Gumshoe as he got his coat on. It smelled of cum and ass juice. Dude, how about you cunts get those fags said Trucy.

Our asses are too busy getting the fucking trial ready to find Apollo's retarded cunt said Klavier. Oh YES NIGGA said Fulbright. Fulbright got really hard thinking about Apollo.

Get the fucking ninjas and shit. Use the ninja signal to call the fucking ninjas. Make sure you get him back alive said Trucy. Fine you hot damn bitch said Fulbright.

Fulbright and Gumshoe left to find Apollo in their car. Gumshoe immediately started injecting meth and shot blacks as he drove. Kill those fags said Fulbright as he snorted.

While driving, Gumshoe called the ninja commander, P. Enis Sexx. Dude we need your fucking ass to fucking find that fucking fag Apollo Justice said Gumshoe to Sexx.

Let me fucking fap first. Oh. OHHH. OHHHHHHHHH FUCK said Sexx as he nutted everywhere. Then he looked out of the window and saw Gumshoe and Fulbright driving.

Oh shit there he is said Fulbright. He got out his assault rifle when Gumshoe was driving and shot through Sexx's window. Shit dude I got it said Sexx as he left his house.

Sexx and the ninjas headed towards the ghetto where Apollo was. They saw a mob of black people surrounding a bank. The fuck is going on here said Sexx to the ninjas.

Wait a MINUTE said one of the ninjas. He took his mask off. It was the cashier from when Gumshoe went to Mcdonalds. I recognize this angry mob ANYWHERE said the ninja.

The guy who started this mob is the fucking Apollo faggot! I saw that faggot Gumshoe burning down the fucking Mcdonalds said the ninja.

Wait Gumshoe is the faggot that's giving us fucking orders said P. Enis Sexx, who was using his shuriken as a dildo. Think about it said the ninja. Gumshoe has no dick.

Apollo Justice has the biggest dick I've seen. They're two complete opposites. Both are causing shit to go to shit like the Mcdonalds and the nigger bank. It makes sense.

Dude, that makes sense to me. You're a genius said Sexx as he came on the dildo with his ass. Man these fucking NIGGERS are in our fucking way said the other ninjas.

Just fucking slaughter their inferior race asses said Sexx. Sexx threw shurikens at the niggers, splitting their brains open.

WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT said Harry. The attackers came into the bank through the window. Wait a minute. THOSE ARE NINJAS said Apollo.

Are you Apollo Justice said Sexx. I'm not telling you said Harry. I said ARE YOU APOLLO JUSTICE YOU FUCKING RETARD said Sexx again. He exchanged shurikens for a rifle.

He aimed the assault rifle at Harry and started shooting. Unfortunately, a ninja jumped in front of the bullets and was killed. OH SHIT RUN said Harry to Apollo. The two ran.

FUCK FUCK FUCCCCCCCCKKKKK said Apollo as he was stoned. They'll recognize me when they see the massive bulge in my pants! I hate having a giant dick said Apollo.

Dude we need disguises! And fast said Harry as he took a brief break to get high on meth. I got an IDEA said Apollo. What the fuck is it said Harry as he injected drugs.

I can give you my clothes and you can disguise yourself as me said Apollo. Genius idea said Harry. But won't you be naked said Harry.

I'm not wearing your fucking clothes because I'm not a fucking fag said Apollo. I'm going to the fucking mall and stealing some fucking replacement clothes said Apollo.

The two of them got behind a building and stripped down. Don't look at me said Apollo as he was naked and had his massive dick dangling. Harry put on Apollo's clothes.

Goddamn this suit makes my fucking balls itch said Harry. Fucking FAG said Apollo. His naked body ran out of the ghetto. Wait what the FUCK should I do said Harry to Apollo.

Nigga you just gonna leave my ass like that? For real dawg said Harry. The ninjas caught up to Harry. It's APOLLO said Sexx. He pointed his assault rifle at Harry.

We got you you fucking cunt! Let us tie you up or else we'll pump your head full of lead said Sexx as he pointed his assault rifle at Harry.

I thought you guys were ninjas said Harry. Harry was met with a shuriken to the leg. FUCK FUCK FUCK said Harry. He pulled the shuriken out and threw it at Sexx.

The shuriken sliced Sexx's eye in half. His eye bled all over the ground and coated all the other ninjas in red bodily fluid. KILL THAT MOTHERFUCKER said Sexx to the ninjas.

OKAY FINE I FUCKING SURRENDER YOU CUNTS said Harry. He put his hands up. TIE UP THAT NIGGER said Sexx. His eye continued to drip blood all over the ground.

Harry was tied up and carried by ninjas. Get FUCKED said the ninjas. Who. WHO THE FUCK THREW THE SHURIKEN AT HIS ASS said Sexx. He got out a knife.

WAS IT YOU said Sexx. No it wasn't me, you fucking cunt said the ninja. I SENSE DENIAL said Sexx. He got his knife and slit the ninja's throat, killing the ninja instantly.

GET THAT FAG OUT OF MY SIGHT! WE WERE SUPPOSED TO NOT KILL THAT NIGGER! I GOT MY EYE CUT OUT BECAUSE YOU CAN'T FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS said Sexx.

Apollo ran and ran, with his cock swinging back and forth. Fuck fuck fuck FUCK said Apollo as he was naked. He ran into the nearest mall. Goddamn it where are the GUNS?

And the fucking clothes? Where is all the shit said Apollo. It was the same mall the prosecutors had gone to before the trial.

Then a mysterious figure emerged. Nigga the fuck was that said Apollo. He kept searching and found nothing but dead bodies there from all the carnage. What the fuck?

Why isn't there shit fucking here said Apollo. Then he saw the figure keep appearing in and out. Who the fuck is there said Apollo. Damn that's a nice cock said the figure.

Ew gay. Miss me with that gay shit said Apollo. The figure started shooting at Apollo. His face was obscured by a clown mask. Dude you look like a fucking fag said Apollo.

I can't help that I see a hot guy here! I just want some fucking dick in my ass right now! Penetrate my little boy ass like daddy used to do! FUCK ME HARDER said the figure.

GET OFF OF ME said Apollo. Stop calling me gay and I'll get off your back said the figure. EW NO! GAY! said Apollo. The figure resumed firing shots at Apollo's ass.

FUCK! I NEED A FUCKING DISGUISE said Apollo. He went into the men's clothing store. Oh fuck there's some damn good suits here! Imma steal some good shit said Apollo.

Then he saw a blue suit that looked a lot like Phoenix's. Oh damn I got an idea said Apollo. He put the suit on. Then he found some hair gel and gelled up his hair spiky.

Apollo dyed his hair black. Fuck I look just like that fucking nigger said Apollo who was disguised as Phoenix. He came out of the clothing store.

IS THAT PHOENIX WRIGHT said the figure. HOLY SHIT HE'S SO FUCKING HOT said the figure. He walked over to Apollo and started to caress his face.

Hold on! Phoenix has a fucking spike in front of his hairdo! You DON'T! YOU'RE NOT PHOENIX said the figure. FUCK said Apollo as he ran away. He got a shot in his leg. FUCK!

Get back here so I can fuck you, hottie said the figure. ASS said Apollo as he fled the mall. SHIT FUCK SHIT NIGGER! I GOTTA FUCKING HIDE said Apollo.

Apollo jumped into the dumpster. Those cunts won't fucking find me here! It stinks like fucking shit here, damn said Apollo. The figure ran right past the dumpster.

Where did you go? WHERE IS YOUR ASS said the figure. He continued to look around, shooting anyone that looked like Phoenix. Which was nobody since everyone was black.

He shot them anyway because he hates black people and Jews. While he was doing that, a car whizzed past the figure and crashed into the nearby building.

Gumshoe and Fulbright were in the car. Damn nigga that shit hit hard said Fulbright. Dude our fucking car broke! Fuck said Gumshoe. We can get another one said Fulbright.

Oh SHIT said the figure. A piece of debris went straight for the figure's crotch. He took off his mask and used it to break the debris so it wouldn't hit his cock.

Homie is that YOU said Fulbright. It was Gaspen Payne. Dude the fuck you've been lately nigga said Gumshoe. Give me some of dat white shit said Gaspen to the detectives.

They passed around the cocaine and started to snort it. Listen niggas. As soon as my jetpack ass escaped the concentration camp, I wanted my motherfucking revenge.

Those fucking defense and prosecutor ass cunts had wronged my fucking hot dick for way too fucking long! So I got a fucking kickass idea said Gaspen.

What is it nigga said Fulbright as he took another whiff of the crack and got drunk on rubbing alcohol.

Gaspen started to talk but was interrupted by a shot. The fuck was that. It came from the fake Phoenix. Oh DAMN! Phoenix is here too? His ass is HOT said Gumshoe.

Nigga we get the fucking twofer dawg! Phoenix and Apollo said Fulbright. Dudes, it's not fucking Phoenix. That fag doesn't have the hair right said Gaspen as he was high.

MotherFUCKER said Gumshoe. Then who the fuck is it said Fulbright. I don't fucking know, let's catch that nigger and find out said Gaspen. The three of them left the ghetto.

Shit said Apollo as he ran away. He saw a nigger driving by in his car. Apollo shot the nigger dead and stole the car. Fuck! I'm too fucking stoned to drive right now!

Apollo started to crash and bump the car on poles. Then he looked in the rearview mirror and saw the detectives and Gaspen behind him. Apollo hit the gas immediately.

Shots flew past his car, almost going through his window and hitting him. Those fucking niggers think they can fucking shoot me said Apollo. He shot back at them.

The shot went through the window and hit Gumshoe's arm. FUCK ASS said Gumshoe. Gumshoe shoved Fulbright behind the wheel, causing the car to swerve and crash.

The three of them jumped out as the car crashed into the intersection. Goddamn it! He's getting away! What the fuck should we do said Gaspen.

Dude I don't fucking KNOW NIGGA said Gumshoe. He started to inject meth into his arm but Fulbright stopped him. What the SHIT SHOULD WE FUCKING DO NOW?

As soon as Fulbright said that, they got a call. The fuck is that from said Gaspen. Oh we're working with the Nazis now. It's a long story said Gumshoe.

Dude said Klavier through the receiver. The Nazis are sending a secret shipment of guns from Germany. I want you niggers to get that shit and bring it all here said Klavier.

Oh damn let's get some fucking weapons and shit said Fulbright. You better have found Apollo, or else I'll fucking slit your fucking throats, you retarded faggots said Trucy.

As soon as Gaspen heard Trucy's voice he reviled in horror. EWWWW YUCK GIRLS! I remember that cunt from the concentration camp! Bitch said Gaspen as he was high.

Fine cunt we'll get the fucking niggers and guns and shit said Gumshoe. They hung up on the two. I got another idea said Fulbright. What the fuck could it be said Gumshoe.

The two of them stole another car and started driving towards where the shipment was supposed to be. Hey look! Just as I suspected, it's the fake Phoenix said Fulbright.

Gumshoe shot at Apollo. Apollo started to chase them in his car. I'm going to fucking slaughter those fucking cunts said Apollo as he relentlessly chased them to the shipment.

We got him said Fulbright. As the three of them drove towards the shipment, Apollo followed them. The shipment was on top of a tall building. The three got out.

The detectives and Gaspen went into the shipment building. Apollo chased them through the building, killing any niggers and Jews he ran past.

The three of them made it to the top. HOLY FUCKING SHIT said the three. The fuck do we do now said Gumshoe. Now we wait said Fulbright. Seems legit said Gaspen.

Apollo ran up the stairs to the top of the building. Oh. Shit. said Apollo. He was surrounded on three sides, outnumbered three to one.

He started to leave, but Gaspen blocked off the stairs. Apollo felt a shuriken dig into his ass. There were ninja helicopters all around, shooting shurikens at Apollo all along.

What the fuck is going on here said Apollo as he desperately tried to dodge all the shurikens. Then a rope came down with some ninjas, carrying a red-suited man.

HARRY WEINER said Apollo. Harry Weiner? I know mine is massive, but you don't have to go fucking shouting it all the goddamn time said Gaspen.

No, I mean the guy's fucking name! Harry Weiner said Apollo. Weiner? I'm sorry, but this is clearly Apollo Justice said Gumshoe. Wait a minute, is this a fake too said Gaspen.

There's only one way to find out said Fulbright. Pull his pants down! If his dick is massive, it's him. If it's tiny as shit, it's not said Gumshoe. THAT'S FUCKING GAY said Apollo.

Apollo took a stray gun from the shipment and shot part of Harry's ropes off. He was free. GET HIM said Fulbright. The ninjas grabbed him in seconds and took off his pants.

Oh shit said Apollo. Damn that's a hairy weiner all right! But it's a tiny ass one! Three fucking inches! My mom has more dick than this fucking retard said Fulbright.

This can't be Apollo said Gumshoe. YOU FUCKING WASTED OUR FUCKING TIME said Gaspen. He grabbed Harry by the neck and took him to the edge of the building.

HARRY NO! GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF MAH HOMIE said Apollo. Gaspen took another stray gun and shot Harry in the arm. Harry fell down to the ground.

Gaspen shot Harry in the crotch next. He was bleeding all over the ground and some started to drip onto the streets below. Then Gaspen shoved Harry off of the building.

Harry fell down to the ground, where he blew up into a mess of blood and guts. Apollo shot off part of his own ropes, allowing him to escape.

Fuck! I have no way out said Apollo. He jumped off of the building, landing on Harry's pile of guts which broke his fall. Damn guts feel kinda good to land on said Apollo.

Apollo immediately went to escape, but found himself face to face with none other than the ninja commander P. Enis Sexx. Take this faggot to the court storehouse said Sexx.

His ninjas tied up Apollo and hauled him in a van, ready to be taken back to the storehouse.

The detectives and Gaspen got in a van and drove themselves back. Dude, how did you guys get with the Nazis said Gaspen as he smoked some crack.

Well, we were arrested for all the sex dungeon shit. Then some Nazis broke us out of prison. We joined the Nazis after those sexy homies saved our asses said Fulbright.

Seems legit said Gaspen as he kept smoking crack and injecting marijuana. Nigga, we need your ass to help us. We got a fucking gay ass trial coming up said Gumshoe.

A trial said Gaspen. The four prosecutors are the defendants said Fulbright. YES I GET TO FUCKING SEND THOSE CUNTS TO JAIL! Sign me UP said Gaspen.

The three of them drove back to the court storehouse, with Apollo in tow and Sexx as the ninja commander. Everything seemed to be falling into place.


	13. The Ten Homosexuals

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2 Part 13: The Ten Gays

While the trial was being set up, at 3 am, a secret meeting was held in the prison.

A suited man whose identity is a secret shook hands with an old man and a defense attorney. It's been 9 years since I've seen you last said the suited man.

The defense attorney took a hit of some meth. Nigga, prison sucks ass. I get my ass raped all the fucking time said the defense attorney. Deal with it said the old man.

I've been in prison for 11 fucking years said the old man. For what dawg said the attorney. I fucking murdered that cunt. Slaughtered him. Killed his ass said the old ass man.

I already know, you fucking dipshit said the suited guy. What the fuck do you want from us said the defense attorney. The suited guy pointed a gun at him after he talked.

Come with me. I have a plan to exact revenge on two certain men said the suited guy who was quite old. Oh damn we gotta do that shit said the defense attorney.

Who the fuck are we getting revenge on said the old guy. Come in closer so I can tell you said the suited man.

Meanwhile, the detectives were driving Apollo to the storehouse. Shut the fuck up you fucking NIGGER said Gumshoe. Apollo tried to scream but his mouth was taped shut.

Goddamn it! It's 4:20 am! If we don't get to the storehouse soon, we can't prepare for the fucking trial said Fulbright. Excuse me, there's a fucking trial here said Gaspen.

Nigga, we're prosecuting the fucking prosecutors! I'll tell you the fuckin' plan once we get to those fucking German ass niggers said Fulbright. The prosecutors said Gaspen.

Gaspen immediately got a massive boner. DUDE THOSE FUCKERS ARE SEXY AS SHIT said Gaspen. I know you want to fuck those fucking homies so fucking hard, Gaspen.

You have to be fucking patient you fucking cunt said Fulbright. Who the FUCK is this fag said Gumshoe as he was snorting cocaine and injecting rock hard crack into his ass.

Shut up said Fulbright. Once we get to the fucking storehouse we'll talk it over with Cuntfaggot and Bitchface said Gumshoe. He tightened the tape around Apollo's body.

The blood from Harry was getting crusty and itchy, so Apollo started itching. STOP IT RIGHT FUCKING NOW said Gaspen. Damn it feels good to be giving orders said Gaspen.

The four of them got to the court storehouse. Goddamn it! What took you cunts so fucking long said Trucy. Ungrateful bitch, we only took a couple damn hours said Gumshoe.

And who's this ficken' motherficken' faggot doing in my headquarters said Klavier. You mean Gaspen Payne said Fulbright. Yeah that stupid fucking faggot said Trucy.

Damn that HOT ASS said Gaspen. He was too mesmerized by Klavier's thick buttocks to say anything of use. Why can't we get any other straight guys here said Klavier.

How about you faggots shut the cunt up said Gaspen. He went straight for the cocaine and started to snort it. DAMN! DAMN! That shit HITS said Gaspen as he was high.

Dude, what took yo nigga asses so ficken' long said Klavier. We fucking saw Phoenix and wanted to hump his ass. But he was a FAKE! Motherfucker chased us around!

We caught up to that cunty fag and caught him said Fulbright. Wait you got my daddy? The fuck said Trucy. No it's a fake said Fulbright. Then who the fuck is he said Klavier.

Gumshoe brought in the fake Phoenix, who was really Apollo. UNTIE ME YOU MOTHERFUCKERS said Apollo. Who the fuck is this fucking faggot said Klavier again.

He dyed his hair and fucking shit so I don't fucking know said Gumshoe. There's only one fucking way to find out! Rip off his pants and see how big his dick is said Trucy.

Trucy went to Apollo's crotch and ripped off his pants, revealing his massive foot long penis. OH DAMN THAT IS A BIG DICK said Gaspen. Wait a minute said Trucy.

I recognize that dick! IT'S APOLLO said Trucy. Fulbright poured bleach into his hair, removing the dye. Then he moved the hair back into place. YOU MOTHERFUCKER!

YOU WERE RIGHT UNDER OUR FUCKING ASSES THE WHOLE GODDAMN TIME said Gumshoe. He pointed a gun at Apollo's head. Enough you fucking cunt said Klavier.

We wanted you two fags to get him back alive, not dead. Retarded ass Jews said Trucy. Fine said Gumshoe as he put his gun away. I have some plans with you said Trucy.

She took her clothes off and started to rape Apollo again. GET THE FUCK OFF ME YOU STUPID BITCH said Apollo as he struggled to keep her off of him.

Damn nigga, where the prosecutors be at dawg said Gaspen as he took a hit off his blunt. The damn prosecutors? Those cunts are in the fucking detention center said Klavier.

FUCK said Gaspen. I WANTED TO FUCK THEIR FUCKING PROSECUTOR ASSES IN THE BUTT LIKE FUCKING BUTT FUCKING THEM said Gaspen as he pantomimed thrusting.

Dude we can fucking buttrape them later said Fulbright as he took a hit of his blunt. Homie, what the shit should I do to help for the fucking trial said Gaspen to the others.

Homie, dawg, home slice said Klavier. You get to fucking sit there and be useless like you gay people are. Nobody likes you fucking waste of time faggots said Klavier.

MOTHERFUCKER said Gaspen. He was so angry that he busted the door open. There was a guy outside the door. Gaspen slit the guy's throat and dragged his corpse in.

You better not be doing what I think you're doing said Gumshoe. Gaspen started to stick his dick inside where the guy's throat was slit and started to throatfuck the corpse.

HOLY SHIT THAT'S FUCKING DISGUSTING said Fulbright. As Gaspen raped the corpse, blood and guts sprayed across the room. Fuck said Trucy as blood got on her face.

She was spending so much time raping Apollo that she didn't notice that Gaspen had slit a guy's throat. Fucking stop with that gay shit said Trucy. She pulled out a gun.

Trucy shot Gaspen in the leg. Fucking BITCH said Gaspen as his dick slid out of the guy's throat. Goddamn it said Klavier. Just get into another fucking circle and plan shit out.

If we just fucking shoot and rape each other and shit, we won't ever get this fucking trial over with said Klavier.

Gumshoe, get to the crime scene and stop anyone from fucking investigating. Any wrong clues and those niggers will be found innocent said Klavier. Yes sir said Gumshoe.

Meanwhile, in Wright's offices, Phoenix was sleeping. WAKE THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING DUMBASS PIECE OF SHIT said Athena. WHAT THE FUCK ATHENA said Phoenix.

I'M FUCKING TRYING TO GET SOME REST FOR THE GODDAMN TRIAL! WHAT DO YOU WANT, THE DEFENDANTS TO BE FUCKING GUILTY? said Phoenix.

Damn dude! Chill! We need to get to the fucking crime scene and gather evidence! Or else we won't have any evidence for the fucking trial said Athena. You're right Athena.

We gotta get to that fucking crime scene or they're guilty! Phoenix and Athena immediately stole a car and drove towards the Walmart.

There won't be any fucking cops and shit when it's fucking 5 in the morning said Athena. Good thinking said Phoenix. They got to the Walmart and bypassed the police tape.

Hold it RIGHT THERE! I caught you RED FUCKING HANDED said Gumshoe. WHAT THE FUCK said Athena and Phoenix. Gumshoe and his cops pointed assault rifles at them.

What the absolute fuck, Gumshoe? Aren't you supposed to be in prison said Phoenix. I was, but I was released early. For good behavior said Gumshoe.

Seems legit said Phoenix. But how the fuck are you a detective said Athena. You were fucking fired a while ago said Phoenix. I was brought back to the force said Gumshoe.

Why the fuck are you tackling a mass murder case? You're a fucking random detective who once got fired who was in prison and shouldn't even be here said Phoenix.

How about you stop asking questions to the fuckers with assault rifles to your heads. Get the fuck out of my crime scene. Only authorized individuals can enter said Gumshoe.

Bullshit! YOU MOTHERFUCKER said Phoenix as he was carried away and kicked out of the crime scene. YOU CUNT ASS NIGGER JEW said Athena as she was kicked out.

FUCK! FUCK! Those fucking CUNT ASS NIGGERS said Phoenix. I know, those retards should be fucking fired and shit! Why can't we investigate our own case said Athena.

Wait a minute. I got an idea. We can't investigate the crime scene, but we can get someone who can. Do those cunts need a forensic investigator said Phoenix.

I can't ask those retarded fags without them shooting my ass! The fuck do we know that said Athena. Whatever, let's fucking guess that they need one instead said Phoenix.

I know someone who's good at doing forensics shit. We can get her to investigate in our place. Gumshoe doesn't know that she's involved with our case said Phoenix.

Is it Ema Skye? That fucking whore said Athena. That bitch said Phoenix. Imma get her ass to fucking sneak in and shit. Maybe we can get some fingerprinting done.

I'll call that fucking cunt when I'm done with my fucking METH BREAK said Phoenix as he reached for his meth pipe. Damn I should take a weed break too said Athena.

After taking his meth break, Phoenix called up Ema on his phone. Ema, the fuck you doing right now said Phoenix. Dude, it's 5 in the fucking morning. I'm trying to sleep.

It better be something fucking important, like a fucking emergency or something said Ema. Bitch, please. You know I can beat your ass whenever I want. I control you.

I can come over to your house and shoot you in the ass. I could blow your fucking brains out, you fucking slut. So how about you cooperate, you fucking whore said Phoenix.

Damn dude that's fucking sexist as shit said Athena. Shut the fuck up you fucking whore or I'll beat your ass too said Phoenix to Athena. I need some favors from you.

You know, some... favors. I'm talking S to the Ex here, you know. The cleaning of the pipes, if you know what I mean said Phoenix. Fine you fucking retard said Ema.

You better give it to me good, like really fucking good, or else I'll fucking cut you and let your rotting corpse drip blood and guts all over my fucking lab table said Ema.

I'll fucking dissect you like the fucking frogs in biology class. I'll disintegrate your fucking skin and rip off your hair. I'll take your brain matter and cook it and eat it said Ema.

Jesus fucking Christ, I get it, you fucking slut said Phoenix. Do what I say like a good little girl said Phoenix. Why the fuck do you have to be such a fucking ass said Athena.

Just come over to my fucking offices when you can. Like in five minutes said Ema. The two of them drove to her offices.

Bitch, your offices look retarded. I can do better than this shit, yours are messy and look like a fucking pig like the bitchy ass cunt you ARE said Phoenix.

You didn't call me here to fucking insult my ass. The fuck you want said Ema. We want you to fucking disguise yourself to investigate a crime scene for us said Athena.

Some fucking cunt ass Jews won't let us into the fucking crime scene since we're not fucking authorized to enter the fucking thing said Athena to Ema.

So what the fuck do you want me to do said Ema. Just take your sciency shit and get information, like fingerprints and that luminol shit. We need all we can get said Athena.

How about you let me do the talking said Phoenix. How about you SHUT THE FUCK UP said Ema. She kicked Phoenix in the nuts.

Phoenix passed out. When he woke up, he had cuts all over his skin. WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT FUCK said Phoenix. Athena came in. Damn Phoenix said Athena.

I always knew you liked to cut yourself, you emo ass faggot. How about you drink some bleach or jump off a bridge, would make the world a hella lot better said Athena.

Kill yourself, you fucking waste of time BITCH! MY FUCKING BODY IS BLEEDING AND I HAVE CUTS AND I FUCKING NEED AN AMBULANCE OR SOME SHIT said Phoenix.

Then Ema came in with a knife in her hand. She had red, thick liquid all over her lab coat. WHAT THE FUCK said Phoenix and Athena. Oh shit said Ema. I can explain.

OH REALLY! IT LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE FUCKING BLOOD ON YOUR FUCKING COAT! YOU FUCKING CUT INTO ME said Phoenix.

I was making a sandwich in the kitchen said Ema. Of course you were in the kitchen where your bitch ass belongs said Phoenix. I was cutting a tomato and it got real intense.

The knife slipped and spilled tomato juice ALL OVER MY WHITE LAB COAT! MOTHERFUCKING FAGGOT JEW said Ema as she swung the knife in the air and stabbed the wall.

We gotta get out of here. This bitch is crazy said Athena. I have one thing to do first said Phoenix. He got up and ripped Ema's bloody clothes off.

Phoenix immediately started to rape Ema. There was so much blood everywhere from the lab coat and the cuts that the floor was coated in a quarter inch of blood.

I can't fucking watch this shit said Athena. Let's get the fuck out of here said Athena. She left the room and out of the office, and started to prepare for the trial on her own.

Wow, bitch is so abrasive but she's so fucking submissive when I tap her cunt with my massive cock said Phoenix as he walked out. The fuck about your cuts said Athena.

I don't give much of a shit, that sex felt too good for me to fucking pass up said Phoenix. He took a hit of some meth. Dude, the trial's in a fucking hour! We gotta go!

If we don't get to the courthouse, the defendants will be immediately guilty said Athena. Fine bitch, let's get to the fucking courthouse said Phoenix as he was high.

Meanwhile, in the prison, the suited man was still talking. Before I tell you about those two, I must tell you a story passed on through generations said the suited man.

Huddle together and listen up said the suited man.

Let me tell you the story of the Ten Gays. Long ago, ten thousand years ago, everyone on the planet was straight. Dicks went into pussies and bitches moaned for cock.

Then, all of a sudden, one man started to act really gay. His name was Dixon Payne. He used to have a hot wife. I'm talking banging here, bitch had tits bigger than her head.

But then he saw a guy. This wasn't any regular guy. He was Darren Sexxgod. He had a massive ten pack, bulging pectorals, a tight ass, and a giant crotch. I'm talking giant.

Every hot chick in the fucking town wanted to suck his massive, 14 inch dick. He was that much of a sex legend. Payne felt really strange that day. His boner got real erect.

GOD HOLY SHIT I NEED TO GET RID OF THIS MASSIVE FUCKING BONER said Payne. He started to jack off thinking of Sexxgod's massive dick. Payne thought of his ass.

Damn that guy was so fucking HOT said Payne. He jacked off so hard he nutted all over the fucking walls and ceiling. Then his wife came in. WHAT THE SHIT said his wife.

I can explain said Payne. Then his wife kicked him in the balls. YOU WHORE said Payne. He took a nearby knife and slit his wife's throat, causing her to bleed all over and die.

OH SHIT OH SHIT I HAVE TO HIDE THE BODY said Dixon Payne. He stuffed his wife's body in the corner and disguised it to make it look like she was just sleeping.

Payne smeared some of his cum on her face to make it look like she was also sucking his dick. That looks convincing as shit said Dixon Payne.

Then a knocking was heard at his door. OH SHIT THAT'S THE COPS said Payne. He went and opened the door. It was the cops. Then Payne saw who the cop was.

OH SHIT IT'S DARREN SEXXGOD said Payne. His dick immediately got erect again. Imma need to search your fucking place said Sexxgod. YES PLEASE said Dixon Payne.

Sexxgod started to search Payne's place. Whatever you do, don't go into my goddamn bedroom! Or else I'll fucking kill you said Dixon Payne. Imma do that said Sexxgod.

Sexxgod went into Dixon's bedroom and get this. He saw the wife's body and said ew. Yuck. Women are ugly and disgusting said Sexxgod. I like men better said Sexxgod.

OH SHIT HE LIKES MEN! DOES HE LIKE ME said Payne. He smiled seductively at Sexxgod. Do you want to get in my bed and tap each other's hot asses? I'm talking, like.

We can do the fucking human centipede or the anal rollercoaster or the ass blaster said Payne. Dude you do NOT have sex with a police officer said Sexxgod.

Sexxgod got out a knife and threatened to stab Payne. OH SHIT said Payne. He took out his own knife and stabbed Sexxgod in the chest, killing him instantly. ASS said Payne.

Damn that hot body had to go to waste! Or did it? said Payne as he got a good idea. Payne started to rape Sexxgod's corpse. He hadn't had dick before and it felt really good.

FUCK! FUCK! THAT FEELS GOOD AS SHIT said Payne. Payne liked the gay sex so bad he nutted everywhere again. Then Sexxgod's partner came in, Dickcock Weinerfaggot.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE said Weinerfaggot. Payne killed him and started to cook and eat his corpse. He took so much time to eat the body that more cops came.

YOU'RE UNDER ARREST, DIXON PAYNE! GET ON THE FUCKING FLOOR RIGHT FUCKING NOW YOU FUCKING RETARD said the cops. YOU AREN'T TAKING ME ALIVE said Payne.

Payne escaped the house and got into his prehistoric car. OH SHIT I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE said Payne as he left. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK said Payne.

Why can't I fucking want to fuck girls like every other fucking dude? FUCKING FAGGOTS GOT TO BRING A BROTHER DOWN said Payne. Then he saw a dick in the distance.

Is that a dick? I want to suck some DICK SO FUCKING BAD said Payne. It was Sexxgod's dick. Wait I thought I fucking slaughtered your ass said Payne. I'll explain.

When you stabbed me, I liked how you fucked my corpse so hard that I pretended to be dead. I wanted you to fuck me real good. I've never seen another guy lover before.

Payne, you have a spirit like none other. The way you violated me wanted me to scream for daddy. I loved your massive cock so fucking BAD said Sexxgod who was also gay.

Nigga, we gotta find some other guy lovers and get a fucking orgy going! I wanna fucking VIOLATE some dude assholes so fucking hard said Dixon Payne.

So the two of them set out on a journey to find more faggots and shit. They found Weinerfaggot and seven more faggots. I don't know who those fucking niggers are.

The ten of them were the only gay people in existence at that point. I don't remember the rest of that fucking story said the suited guy.

Dude that was the gayest story I've heard in my life said the defense attorney. My dick is as soft as a wet noodle right now. Miss me with that gay shit said the old man.

I know it's really gay, but I had a reason to share it. You see, the faggots have begun a line of children that bear their DNA. The Paynes live on to this day.

The two current Payne brothers are just as gay as Dixon was said the suited guy. Dude how did they have CHILDREN IF THEY'RE FUCKING GAY said the defense attorney.

That's the part I don't fucking understand said the suited guy. I don't have the rest of the fucking story! If I just had the rest of that fucking story! FUCK! said the suited guy.

So what about the Payne brothers said the old man. The Paynes have mastered a secret to reproducing while being gay. In fact, all the families of the Ten Gays have done so.

If we can kill the Paynes and the other Ten Gay families, we can eliminate gay people from this world forever said the suited guy.

Wait a minute. Gaspen Payne was behind the female genocide said the defense attorney. Yes. He thought that all men reproduced like the Paynes do said the suited guy.

So what should we do now said the old man. Dawg, we gotta find the ten Gays and kill them all. Start with the Paynes, then we can kill the Sexxgods and the Weinerfaggots.

Once all gays are gone, straight will be the only sexual orientation! No more faggots! SIEG HEIL said the suited guy.

Mein Fuehrer, I hate not having any fucking codenames! We're just fucking suited guy and old man and defense attorney said the old man. I have an idea said the attorney.

Old man, you are Gluteus. I am Maximus said Maximus, the defense attorney. I will be Fagslayer, sounds cooler than your gay ass name said the suited guy, Fagslayer.

It do be fitting, dawg said Maximus. We slay fucking fags all the fucking time said Gluteus. Now get into another circle. I have a plan said Fagslayer.

To be continued in part 14.


	14. Trial and Error

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2 Part 14: Trial and Error

Wake your ASS UP said Athena to Phoenix. GET UP! IT'S LIKE 9:30 AM! WE NEED TO GET TO THE FUCKING TRIAL said Athena. Bitch gimme another minute said Phoenix.

NO MORE MINUTES! IF WE'RE LATE THEY GET FOUND GUILTY said Athena. Fine bitch. Let me get my coffee first said Phoenix.

NO TIME FOR FUCKING COFFEE! WE GOTTA FUCKING GO said Athena as she dragged Phoenix out of bed. Phoenix got out his pistol and started to shoot. STOP said Athena.

Fine bitch, let's get the fuck out and scram said Phoenix. Damn those are some nice tits said Phoenix to Athena, who was still in her underwear.

How about you shut the fuck up, you waste of space said Athena. She kicked him in the nuts. FUCKING CUNT ASS WHORE NIGGER said Phoenix. They got their suits on.

The two of them got out of the door. Then a shuriken popped one of the car's tires. THE CAR'S FUCKED said Phoenix. WE GOTTA GET TO THE FUCKING COURT said Athena.

I have an idea said Athena. The buses always come around this time of day. If we can hijack a bus, we can drive it to the court said Athena. Genius 200 IQ plays said Phoenix.

Meanwhile, in the court, the prosecutors were snorting meth. Dude, I hate that we have to snort meth in secret so the guards can't fucking see us said Godot.

I know, right? It's fucking unfair and retarded said Blackquill as he was 420 blazing it. Dude, gimme some of dat good shit said Payne. Blackquill passed the blunt to Payne.

Oh shit it's 9:55! THE TRIAL'S ABOUT TO START said Edgeworth. Let's get the fuck out of here and to the defendant's chair before the fucking trial starts said Godot.

The trial started as the prosecutors got to the defendant's seat. Klavier and Trucy were at the prosecution's bench. Nigga this better fucking work out said Klavier.

Court is now in session for the trial of Miles Edgeworth, Simon Niggerquill, Coffee Guy, and Winston Agony said the judge. Wow this is fucking retarded said Edgeworth.

I know right! I have to fucking sit in this stupid ass defendant chair and share it with you fags! Let me have a turn on the chair said Blackquill. Fuck no said Edgeworth.

Give your opening statement and shit since there doesn't seem to be a defense right now said the judge. Yes, Your Honor said prosecutor Klavier.

A few days ago, the four prosecutors were seen at a local Walmart. They shot the place up and killed hundreds of innocent people. We have a witness who saw them do it.

The manager of Walmart, Seymour Kuntz, was threatened by the ringleader, Miles Edgeworth, and shot a few times. We will hear from him in the trial said Klavier.

Excuse me, who's the bitch right next to you said the judge. Oh, that's Trucy Wright said Klavier. Damn she's fucking sexy said the judge. Fucking nigger said Trucy.

Wait the prosecution can't have an assistant said the judge. Yes they can said Klavier. It's just that you never see prosecutors having assistants next to them said Klavier.

Seems legit homie said the judge. Damn I can go for some meth right now said the judge as he started to inhale his secret meth stash in the judge's seat.

Dude, I just realized! WHERE IN THE HOLY MOTHER OF JESUS CHRIST IS OUR FUCKING DEFENSE! WE'RE FUCKING GUILTY AS SHIT IF THEY DON'T SHOW UP said Godot.

Nigga, we be fuckin' fucked up the ass if those fuckin' niggas not be here said Blackquill. Good thing we snuck some crack in here said Payne as he started to snort crack.

Meanwhile, at the bus stop, Phoenix and Athena were waiting for the bus. It better get here RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR WE'RE FUCKING LATE said Phoenix as he was high.

The bus came. Phoenix and Athena shoved the other people out of the way to get on. GET OFF THE FUCKING SEAT said Phoenix as he blew the bus driver's brains out.

Phoenix took control of the bus. I'll take care of the fags on here said Athena as she got out an assault rifle. Fine bitch said Phoenix as he started to run people over.

Athena started to massacre the people on the bus. She didn't stop until they were all dead. Fucking die said Athena as she fired shots onto the innocent people.

Shit we better get to the fucking court said Phoenix. If we get late, we're fucking GUILTY said Athena. Wait a minute said Phoenix.

They were getting to the court when Phoenix saw some hair. The fuck did this come from said Phoenix. He picked it up while he was driving because he was cool as shit.

What's taking the fucking defense so long said Payne. Well, if the defense isn't here, then I guess they're guilty said the judge. Oh SHIT said the prosecutors.

OBJECTION said Edgeworth. You can't declare us guilty without a trial! No verdict can be passed without a defense said Edgeworth. I don't fucking care said the judge.

How about you shut your ficken ass up and suck some fucking wienerschnitzel dick like your fucking mom did last night said Klavier. You're guilty as shit said Trucy.

Shut the fuck up, you fucking whore! Nobody cares what you bitches say anymore said Payne. Objection overruled. The defendant can't object, dumbasses said the judge.

Just get it over with already, mein Gott! They're guilty as schiessen said Klavier. The judge was about to slam his gavel on the counter when a bus crashed through the court.

The bus ran over some bailiffs. Who the fuck just crashed a fucking bus right in the middle of my courtroom said the judge. Phoenix and Athena came out of the bus.

FUCKING FINALLY said the prosecutors. OH MY FUCKING GOD ARE YOU SERIOUS! DECLARE THE VERDICT ALREADY said Klavier. I can't declare the verdict said the judge.

The defense is now at the trial. We can't say they're guilty now said the judge. FUCK said Klavier and Trucy. The defense is ready, Your Honor said Phoenix and Athena.

First of all, move that goddamn bus! It's in the way of the witness stand said Klavier. As soon as he said that, the bus exploded, sending some debris into Klavier's ass.

Problem solved said Phoenix. Well, let's get this trial started said the judge. I call Seymour Kuntz to the stand said Klavier. Kuntz came up to the stand.

State your name and occupation, witness said Trucy. I'm Seymour Kuntz, manager of the Walmart that was shot up said Kuntz. Give testimony, you cunt ass Jew said Klavier.

That day I was fucking doing some shit and then that red suited retard fucking showed up on my ass! He aimed an assault rifle at me and asked me about some ninjas.

I knew jack shit about what he was talking about. I swear, then he was insane or something and he shot my goddamn leg! I was freaking out because I was bleeding and shit.

Then he asked me about some more Nazi ninjas like he did last time. Fucking asshole shot my ass for fucking nothing. I told him that he was retarded and he should die.

Then that fucking ass shot me in the arm! It was literally the worst pain I've felt in my life! I told him the Nazis were from Germany to get him off my ass and not fucking die.

That was a good enough answer for him. He left my ass alone for five seconds and then he shot me in the literal ass! Fucking nigger ass Jew! So I called an ambulance.

If I didn't call an ambulance, I would have fucking died! The ambulance came by, and I could see what happened. Visor guy sniped the ambulance driver, and it crashed!

It exploded away from me so I lived. I called another fucking ambulance while those asshats were driving away in their tank. Niggers didn't see that shit coming, did they?

Kuntz was sweating and his wounds from that day started to act up and bleed. FUCK said Kuntz. OBJECTION said Athena. That testimony was retarded as shit said Athena.

If you were shot three goddamn times, how are you still alive? You should have bled to death while the two ambulances were coming to the Walmart said Athena.

Objection said Klavier. His wounds are clearly still bleeding. Show them to the court for us, Kuntz said Klavier. Fine, you stupid German Nazi said Kuntz.

Kuntz showed the wounds on his arm and leg. The one on your ass too said Phoenix. What are you gay or something? I'm not showing my ass to the fucking court said Kuntz.

Fine you stupid Jew said Phoenix. Wait, how could Godot have sniped the ambulance guy through the glass of the ambulance, through the Walmart and kill him said Athena.

That must have been a really good shot said Trucy. But that's the most stupid retarded autistic thing I've heard in my life said Phoenix. I don't fucking care said Klavier.

Goddamn it, these cunts have planned everything out! What the fuck are we gonna do, Athena said Phoenix. I don't fucking know, these asses have us guilty said Athena.

This seems legit to me said the judge. I think we can have a verdict declared right now, the evidence is really conclusive said the judge.

Excuse me, the evidence is not fucking conclusive! There isn't even any EVIDENCE YOU STUPID ASS JUDGE said Edgeworth. Dude, I have a fucking dope ass idea said Godot.

This prosecutor's seat is itchy and cramped. What if we escaped the courtroom and watched the trial from the court gallery said Godot. Nigga that kicks ass said Blackquill.

Blackquill pulled out his samurai sword and stabbed the bailiff in the nuts. Let's get the hell out of here said Blackquill. The prosecutors escaped the courtroom.

Dude, where's the court gallery stairs said Payne. This way said Godot. The four of them then saw some masked guys. Are those ninjas said Edgeworth.

I think they might be. I know what ninjas look like, and those are ninjas. Let's get the shit out of here before they find us said Blackquill as the prosecutors got to the gallery.

The prosecutors took a seat in the court gallery by pushing some people aside, watching the trial instead of sitting in the defendant's chair like they should be.

Goddamn this trial is boring as shit! BOOOORING said Edgeworth. Damn right. This shit is fucking gay and retarded said Blackquill. Dude we need to pass the time said Godot.

How about you shut the fuck up so I can watch the fucking trial said the guy in front of Edgeworth. How about you kill yourself you fucking nigger said Edgeworth.

Make me, you cunt fucking retard Jew! I'll shove my fist so far up your fucking throat that it'll go up your goddamn asshole and shit my fist out of your rear end said the guy.

Are you sure about that said Edgeworth as he pulled out a knife and grabbed his throat. If you say another fucking word I'll slit your motherfucking throat said Edgeworth.

Fuck off, you stupid cunt ass nigger said the guy. Fine then said Edgeworth. He slit the guy's throat. Oh shit said Edgeworth as the guy in front of him keeled over and died.

WHAT THE FUCK said the guy's girlfriend who was sitting next to him. Mind your own business you goddamn bitch said Edgeworth. I'M CALLING THE COPS said the girlfriend.

Oh no you're not said Edgeworth as he slit her throat too. The rest of the gallery screamed and started running out.

Edgeworth the fuck did you do this time said Payne. Dude, I was just fucking arguing with this cunt in front of me. He fucking tried to kill me so I killed him said Edgeworth.

Then his bitch ass hoe girlfriend told my ass that I was fucking retarded so I went apeshit on that hoe and stabbed that ass like fucking Kraft mac and cheese said Edgeworth.

Dude the cops are gonna get on our ass said Godot. I have an idea said Blackquill. Get to the court entrance and get some explosives said Blackquill. Seems legit said Godot.

Godot got some explosives from their explosive stash and went to the entrance of the court. Nigga we better be aight. I gotta fuck some bitches tonight said Edgeworth.

Phoenix, what the fuck are we going to do? They're going to be guilty said Athena. I don't fucking know bitch said Phoenix. That testimony was really reliable said Klavier.

Wait a minute said Phoenix. Trucy is that you sitting right next to Faggotface said Phoenix. Oh, Wright, I see your ass there. You're a retarded ass faggot Jew said Trucy.

Why didn't she call me daddy said Phoenix. I don't fucking know, she's got a potty mouth on her, wonder which lawyer she got that from said Athena.

What are you doing with Klavier, Trucy? Come back here right fucking now or I'll beat your ass said Phoenix. Probably sucking his German dick like a cunt should said Athena.

No, fuck off, you stupid ass retarded lawyer! Kill yourself and rot in hell said Trucy. I swear, imma get the fucking paddle when I see her ass again! Bitch said Phoenix.

I'm gonna call another ficken witness said Klavier. Objection I would like to know who the detective at the scene was. Call his ass as a goddamn fucking witness said Phoenix.

Fine said Klavier. Detective Gayshoe, get your fucking ass up here said Klavier. ARE YOU SERIOUS KLAVIER! I'M DICK! GUMSHOE! said Gumshoe as he was dragged in.

Oh my fucking GOD! DICK! LOL! DICK! HIS NAME'S DICK! LIKE A PENIS said Payne as he was laughing from the court gallery. Shut up you fucking autistic fag said Blackquill.

State your name and occupation. Actually, just your occupation, I'm pretty sure all the bitches and fags in the courtroom know what dicks are already said Klavier.

I'm a fucking detective and shit said Gumshoe as he started to smoke some weed on the witness stand. Testify to the court about what evidence we found said Klavier.

Aight dawg. That day the detectives were going to send some random ass fag to the fucking crime scene. I was like that's fucking gay and I fucking went to his fucking house.

While I was at his house, I massacred him and his fucking family so he couldn't have my crime scene. So I was the detective for that case.

I went to the crime scene and I saw a damning piece of evidence! It was a dildo with poop on it! I analyzed, heh heh, anal, the dildo to see who the shit fucking belonged to.

We found out that the shit belonged to Winston Shitface! The glasses ass faggot! The only plausible explanation is that Payne sticked the dildo so far up his ass.

It went so far up his ass that some shit got on it. That proves that he was at the crime scene. And not only that. The cash registers were robbed as well!

We checked the fingerprints on the registers, and they came from Miles Edgeworth! We also found blood at the crime scene, Blackquill's blood, he must have been shot.

And some coffee stains, obviously from Godot! All four prosecutors were at the crime scene that day, all with damning evidence proving they massacred them said Gumshoe.

Oh. Shit. said the two attorneys. Goddamn it, we're fucking guilty as shit! Why did you shoot me in the nuts so I would bleed and leave evidence said Blackquill. Shut up.

I need to rest my fingers from fapping so much said Edgeworth. Thank god I have a rocket launcher to rest my finger on. The trigger is padded real nice said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth rested his finger on the trigger. I need to straighten it out said Edgeworth as he aimed the rocket launcher at the other court gallery members.

Damn I'm tired as shit said Edgeworth. He started to fall asleep with his finger on the trigger. Dude I need a fucking nap or something too said Godot as he started to sleep.

So as you see, the evidence proves that the prosecutors were fucking guilty and at the crime scene! That they also shot and almost killed the manager as well said Trucy.

Wait a minute said Phoenix to Athena. We have the hair from the car! Who does that belong to said Phoenix. I don't know, Phoenix. We can't get it analyzed said Athena.

Oh yes you can said someone from the shadows. It was Ema. The fuck you doing here Ema said Phoenix. I heard you were doing a trial and I saw that hair on the way here.

I can get that shit analyzed for you, it'll just take a little while. Stall for time until I can get the results said Ema. Fine said Phoenix as he handed the hair over.

Ema left to get the hair analyzed. Athena, we need to stall for time so we can get the results back said Phoenix. Wait, we can call the defendants for testimony said Athena.

Yeah, who should we call said Phoenix. I have an idea said Athena. I call Miles Edgeworth to the stand said Athena. You can't call people to the fucking stand said Klavier.

Oh shit I need to take a piss. Trucy, take over for me said Klavier. He went out to take a piss, leaving Trucy as the prosecutor in charge.

Get back here, you stupid ass German cunt said Athena. Edgeworth came up to the stand. That suit is pretty elaborate said Phoenix. Shut up you stupid Jew said Edgeworth.

State your name and occupation said Trucy. I'm Miles Edgeworth, and a fucking prosecutor, you bitch. Damn, I could plow that hot ass like Donkey Kong said Edgeworth.

Testify to the court what you did that day said Athena. Well, let's see. I started that day with a rock hard boner because I was thinking about some sexy hoes. Damn hot.

Then I felt like stroking my dick! So I cranked it real damn hard for an hour or two said Edgeworth. Say something that's relevant to the goddamn murder said Athena.

Fine, you fucking bitch. I was going to the Walmart because I wanted to slaughter some people. Me and the prosecutors started shooting up those motherfucking faggots.

I went into that cunt's office. Suckmore Dicks or whatever his name was. I shot him up three times, nigga! I straight up fucking violated that motherfucker!

Then Godot sniped the ambulance guy, all to plan. We killed the people who came out of the ambulance too! There were so many fucking corpses everywhere said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth, why in the holy mother of Jesus would you say any of this shit? You're going to be found fucking GUILTY said Athena. He's just telling the truth said Trucy.

How do we fucking refute the testimony of our own client said Phoenix. You can't, can you, you stupid fucking blue suited lawyer cunt said Trucy.

Goddamn it! What the shit do we do said Phoenix. Well, that seems legit to me said the judge. I've been too busy fapping to porn to watch the whole trial said the judge.

You're the motherfucking judge! You should be paying attention to the trial, faggot said Athena. I don't fucking care about this shit anymore, I've been judging for 70 years.

The trial can be guilty or not guilty, it's not anything to me anymore said the judge. Dude, you're the one giving the goddamn verdicts, you old ass fuck said Phoenix.

Yawn. Can I leave now? I have better things to do than testify to my own guilt. I'm going to leave the stand right now with the bitch's permission said Edgeworth.

Fine, you can leave. We already have all the proof we need to convict you retards said Trucy. Jesus, I hate standing at this fucking witness stand said Edgeworth as he left.

Edgeworth went back to the defendant's seat. Wait a minute said Athena. Phoenix, did you see that? He went back to the defendant's seat said Athena. So what said Phoenix.

Where are the other prosecutors? Where did they go said Athena. I don't fucking know! I'm not paying attention to that gay ass defendant seat. Not my problem said Phoenix.

Your Honor, the defendants are not in their seats! We can't have a trial without three of the defendants! This is a mistrial said Phoenix. OBJECTION said Trucy.

We can have a trial without the defendants! Isn't that right, Your Honor said Trucy. Yes, we can have a trial without the defendants present in court. It's legal said the judge.

That's not fucking fair at all! No way is that shit legal, you stupid ass old man! Kill yourself and dunk your old ass in a vat of fucking bleach said Phoenix.

Calm down, Phoenix. We have to get our verdict the legit way. We're not getting it by exploiting such obvious fucking things said Athena. I hate you, stupid bitch said Phoenix.

The two of them looked over to the defendant's chair to make sure Edgeworth was there. He wasn't. Excuse me, what in the holy mother of shit is this ass fuck said Phoenix.

Wait a minute, where did Edgeworth go? He's gone again! Motherfucker can't just stay in place! Why can't we have a defendant that's normal in our whole court history?

All we get are these stupid faggots said Athena. I know, right said Phoenix. I think it's apparent who the guilty party is. No more time for deliberation! said Trucy.

Hey, you two. Got the results back from the hair examination said Ema. Take this paper, it will be useful. I'm going to fucking do some more forensics back at home said Ema.

Ema left, leaving the paper to the two attorneys. Really? It's his hair? He isn't even relevant to the fucking case said Phoenix. Well, we have to try SOMETHING said Athena.

Oh, there you are, Edgeworth. I fell asleep for a few minutes said Godot. I almost fell asleep too, couldn't see the fucking courtroom at all, homie said Blackquill.

Mein Gott, my dick really pissed for a long ficken time! Ist das court ready for mein dick said Klavier as he walked back into the courtroom. It's been 20 minutes! said Trucy.

About time you got back! These stupid attorneys are being autistic again! I hate these stupid fucking retards, even my gay ass dad who's blue suited and gay said Trucy.

What evidence do we have said Phoenix. Hold on. Let me check the evidence again. Hold on, hold on said Athena. Better hurry your ass up before shit gets real said Phoenix.

Wait a minute. WAIT A MINUTE! I think I found the truth behind this whole trial! It just became apparent to me! We have the answers right in front of us! said Athena.

It's YOU! You're the key behind this WHOLE ENTIRE TRIAL said Athena as she pointed to the person in question.

To be continued.


	15. The Truth Behind the Trial

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 15: The Truth Behind the Trial

It's you. Wait a minute said Athena. What is it, who are you talking about said Klavier. I can't point at this person... because they're not in the room said Athena.

Elaborate said Trucy. I'm referring to Miles Edgeworth, of course. I request that Miles Edgeworth come back to the witness stand said Athena. But why though said Klavier.

I'll say that later, you German prick. Your Honor, please get Edgeworth back said Athena. Fine hoe. Your ass is hot enough for me to do that said the judge.

Oh SHIT! Fuck! My bladder is gonna fucking explode said Klavier. No bathroom breaks this time said Athena. Bitch, please! I need to piss said Klavier. No, faggot said Athena.

He's probably at the defendant's seat with the other prosecutors said Trucy. Wait a minute. Das isn't anyone at the defendant's seat! Hold on, what the fick said Klavier.

Excuse me, why in the holy name of Christ is the defendant seat empty said the judge. Where are the defendants said Phoenix.

Gott damn it, I really have to piss! Fuck you, you bitch said Klavier as he left to piss. Fucking asshole said Phoenix. Get Miles Edgeworth in this court right now said the judge.

Bailiffs were sent to find Edgeworth. Athena, what the fuck are you getting at here said Phoenix. You'll see. It's all according to my plan to find out the truth said Athena.

Edgeworth was brought in again. Damn nigga, the fuck you want this time said Edgeworth. Edgeworth, I find it interesting that you're wearing that suit today said Phoenix.

Wow, thanks, Wright. Thanks for giving me a fucking complement. Kill yourself said Edgeworth. It's quite intriguing. You haven't worn that suit in years said Phoenix.

In fact, you've had it hanging on your wall for over a decade. How interesting that you decided to wear that suit right now, in this completely unrelated trial said Phoenix.

It's also quite intriguing that your testimony admitted so much guilt. You admitted to everything you were accused of, and more. What do you have to say to this said Athena.

Bitch, please. Like that cunt said, I was telling the fucking truth. If you can't handle the truth, get out of the courtroom, you stupid banana ass whore said Edgeworth.

Jesus, fucking asshole said Phoenix. Also, why is your cravat not tied properly? You always have it in the right position, but oddly not today said Athena.

Enough of this fucking shit! The defense is raising frivolous objections said Trucy. You're right. Any more of this fucking gay shit and I'm kicking you all out said the judge.

Goddamn it. What the shit should we do? We're kinda fucked right now said Athena. I don't fucking know said Phoenix.

Wait a minute said Phoenix. Let's wait. Wait for Klavier to get back. I'll give him fifteen minutes said Phoenix. Dude, that sounds fucking retarded and gay said Edgeworth.

Why the fuck are you getting pissy about Klavier's bathroom break, Edgeworth? Is there something you're not telling us said Phoenix.

What, is the defense asserting that Klavier Gavin isn't in the bathroom? What a frivolous objection said Trucy. You're right, this is all unnecessary said the judge.

I'll humor you with your time. If prosecutor Gavin isn't in the goddamn bathroom, where the hell is he said Edgeworth. He's a lot closer than we all think he is said Athena.

Wait a minute. Ema left her DNA tester in the court said Phoenix. Then he got an idea. Your Honor, the defense would like a recess to test Athena's hypothesis.

If Klavier really did use the bathroom, then his DNA should be in the men's restroom somewhere said Phoenix.

We have a DNA tester right now. During this recess, we will scan the bathrooms to see if Klavier ever used the bathroom like he said said Phoenix. Fine said the judge.

Dude, come on. He's talking shit. Don't give his ass a recess said Edgeworth. Homie, you're good. I declare a ten minute recess said the judge. What the fuck said Trucy.

YES said the two attorneys. Athena, you go and look for the prosecutors. I'll scan the bathrooms said Phoenix. Fine said Athena. Phoenix went to scan the men's bathrooms.

Dude, I'm fucking tired as shit. Oh, there you are, Edgeworth. Was worried for a second. I need to get to the entrance of the court, see you niggas later said Godot.

Godot left the court gallery to get to the entrance of the court. Edgeworth was in the gallery now.

Oh shit. Imma head to sleep said Edgeworth. His eyes started to close as he fell asleep with his gun on the trigger. He set off the rocket launcher, firing a shot at the gallery.

The gallery members exploded, killing a handful of people. The explosion caused part of the court to fall on top of the remaining court gallery members, killing them all.

Oops said Edgeworth. That shit was straight FIRE said Godot as he drank some more coffee. Can you fucking leave already, Godot said Blackquill. Fine said Godot as he left.

Well, at least we have the whole court gallery to ourselves now said Blackquill. Nigga, I can fap my dick on these seats all fucking day dawg. Gimme some cock said Payne.

Dude, pass me some of that dew, homie. You know, the good stuff said Blackquill. I got you fam said Payne as he passed over the mountain dew. Damn said Blackquill.

Aight nigga. This trial hasn't gotten any straighter. Imma head to use the fucking bathroom said Edgeworth.

As Edgeworth was leaving the courtroom, some debris from the exploding corpses got into his eyes through his glasses, temporarily blinding him. FUCK said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth exited the gallery. Dude, where the fuck did we hide those explosive devices said Godot. Nigga, I think they're hidden in the fire extinguisher said Edgeworth.

I remember now. We had explosive devices disguised as fire extinguishers said Godot. The two of them went to the court lobby and found the fire extinguishers.

Dude, I'll scout out the entrance and you'll detonate the explosives when I give the signal said Godot. Wait, what are we doing with the explosives again said Edgeworth.

The explosives are at the court entrance. The court gallery members are still fleeing, when they're at the entrance, we blow them up to leave no witnesses said Godot.

Seems legit said Edgeworth. Godot left for the entrance to scout out the gallery members.

Meanwhile, Phoenix and Athena were going to investigate. Phoenix went to all the men's bathrooms in the court. Athena was trying to find the four prosecutors that escaped.

Where the fuck are these cunts going to be said Athena. Then she saw Klavier walk by. Wait a minute said Athena. Klavier! Get the fuck over here said Athena.

SCHEISSEN SCHEISSEN SCHEISSEN said Klavier as he tried to leave. GET THE FUCK BACK HERE YOU GERMAN RETARD said Athena as she chased Klavier through the court.

Wait a minute said Athena as she saw Phoenix. Phoenix! That faggot came out of the bathroom! Look in there said Athena as she ran off to chase Klavier.

Bitch ass motherfucker said Phoenix as he went into the bathroom. What is this? Wait. I HAVE AN IDEA said Phoenix. Get back here, Klavier, you fucking nigger said Athena.

No, whore! I just got out of the bathroom, the fuck do you need my ass for said Klavier. You were using the bathroom like you said! Get over here you stupid fag said Athena.

At the entrance, the people from the gallery were about to run away through the court entrance.

Edgeworth, get the fucking extinguisher! Pull that fucking shit and blow those motherfuckers up! Dude, what the fuck are you doing? Pull that fucking shit said Godot.

Nigga, give me a second! I have to unzip my pants and smoke some weed, you fucking cunt ass motherfucker said Edgeworth. He took a hit of his blunt for a few seconds.

Edgeworth pulled the trigger on the fire extinguisher. The explosives were activated, blowing up the court entrance and killing every single one of the runaway gallery guys.

Yes. YES YES YES DAWG! Gimme some play homie said Godot. Dude, let me inhale some fucking meth right now said Edgeworth. Fucking stupid ass nigger said Godot.

Then some debris started to collapse at the court entrance. The place might collapse, the trial better be over before our asses get turned into macaroni salad said Godot.

It's fine, you stupid black ass motherfucker said Edgeworth as he was high on meth. Gimme some of dat shit homie said Godot. He took some meth and inhaled it.

Athena was still chasing Klavier. She took a fire extinguisher off the rack. This better work said Athena. She pulled the trigger, detonating some more explosives.

What the fuck. That didn't shoot any white stuff said Athena. I bet you would have really liked to have white stuff shoot all over your face, you slutty ass cunt said Klavier.

Then he looked ahead. FUCK said Klavier. There was debris in his way from the explosions. Klavier was cornered. What are you going to do, you German fuckboy said Athena.

I'm not afraid of you said Klavier as he approached Athena. He grabbed Athena's ass and tits and started to rip off her clothes. You fucking stupid piece of shit said Athena.

She was raped really hard in the courtroom by Klavier. He covered her mouth so she wouldn't scream. Wait a minute. OH SHIT! It's been ten minutes said Klavier.

Klavier nutted in Athena and ran towards the courtroom, leaving her cum stained body on the floor.

Court is now in session again, whatever said the judge. Is the defense ready? Where is the defense? And half of the prosecution? said the judge.

Where is Klavier's stupid German ass at? I've been sitting in this courtroom for the whole fucking recess waiting for his stupid fucking retarded motherfucker ass said Trucy.

Then Klavier came in. Oh my fucking shit said Klavier. What is it, you damned poser said Trucy. It's das attorneys! They've found me! I raped Athena's ass and came back.

Thank Gott I came back before the judge declares them innocent said Klavier. Wow, I don't fucking care at all. Could give much more of a shit than I do right now said Trucy.

Shut das fuck up, cunt said Klavier. If the defense doesn't show up, I have no choice but to declare the defendants guilty said the judge. OH JA JA JA said Klavier.

Then Athena came in, covered in white stuff. Oh damn, that ass looks hot. If we weren't in court right now, I'd tear it open and rape it again like I did before said Klavier.

Shut the fuck up, you stupid fucking piece of shit. I'm not letting your German ass rape me again. Where the fuck is the blue lawyer at, he better show up soon said Athena.

Whatever, there only needs to be one defense attorney. Call Miles Edgeworth back into the courtroom for testimony said the judge.

Bathroom break time said Klavier as he was about to leave. I'm afraid there will be no bathroom breaks today, Klavier Gavin said Edgeworth as he was already at the stand.

Wait WHAT said Klavier and Trucy. Edgeworth, you shouldn't be here said Trucy. Yeah, what das fick is going on said Klavier. It's a simple explanation, Gavin said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth took off his red suit, glasses, and cravat, revealing himself to be Phoenix Wright. Wait WHAT said Klavier and Trucy again. Why are you Edgeworth said Athena.

It's very simple. Let me explain to the courtroom what I found in the recess said Phoenix. I found a bathroom with some vital clues in it. First of all, I found Edgeworth's suit.

Specifically, the very same suit he wore earlier. The one he shouldn't have been wearing for over a decade. I also found his glasses and cravat, the same ones from before.

This is what I was wearing a few seconds ago said Phoenix. So what the fuck does that mean? Edgeworth was using the bathroom, so what? This is all pointless said Trucy.

Let me explain said Phoenix. I indeed then used my DNA tracker to find out who was in the bathroom. To my lack of surprise, I found a certain German prosecutor's DNA.

In fact, it was that man standing over there. Klavier Gavin. I found it in one of the stalls. Was fucking everywhere said Phoenix.

Lies! Slander! This is all pointless and frivolous and has nothing to with the trial! I call bullshit on these blatantly incorrect accusations said Klavier.

Oh, really said Athena. This is only the beginning, you see. It proves a theory that I've been holding for a while. Klavier. YOU are the key to this entire trial said Athena.

You may be asking how Phoenix found the bathroom in the first place. You see, I was walking around the court during the recess. I saw you, Klavier. You came out of there.

Not only that, but when I was about to confront you, you immediately fled the scene. I told Phoenix to investigate the bathroom you came out of during the recess.

All of these discoveries were indeed uncovered in that very same bathroom, the one you fled said Athena. What are you getting at here? This is still pointless said Trucy.

Oh, Trucy. You don't get it. During all of Edgeworth's appearances in the trial, one man was not present. Klavier Gavin. He was always using the bathroom for some reason.

Now we know why. Klavier Gavin, I assert that you were disguising yourself as Miles Edgeworth to give the blatant confession earlier in the trial and before the recess!

Admit it! You were Edgeworth the whole time said Athena. Come on, Your Honor. This is all irrelevant! You know that was really Edgeworth said Klavier.

The prosecution is correct. This is all just meaningless conjecture. No proof at all besides the defense's empty words said the judge.

Empty words? Then I will scan the very clothes I just wore for Klavier's DNA. If it's there, it's undeniable proof he was wearing Edgeworth's clothes earlier said Phoenix.

Phoenix walked to the defense's stand and scanned Edgeworth's clothes. Indeed, Klavier's DNA was covering all of the clothes entirely. What a fucking surprise said Phoenix.

So what do you have to say, Klavier Gavin said Athena. Nein! NEIN NEIN NEIN NEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNN said Klavier.

Fine. I admit it. I was fucking wearing Edgeworth's clothes to give a fake confession. But that doesn't even matter! There's still a ton of evidence against you said Klavier.

Wait a minute. Wait. That nein sounded really familiar said Athena. Then she got a realization. Holy shit. HOLY SHIT. I remember the exact person I heard that from!

Klavier Gavin! You don't happen to know Apollo Justice, do you said Athena. What are you saying, Athena said Phoenix. Apollo, das cunt? I hate das faggot said Klavier.

Really? Your speech patterns lined up quite well with Apollo's in the previous trial! Recall the events of the previous trial said Athena.

Apollo came into the court suddenly that trial day. He seemed quite odd. He was talking with German words. Then he said nein. I remember that very nein from Klavier.

Klavier, you were disguising yourself as Apollo too said Athena. Wait a minute, Athena. We have to think outside the box. What if we have the events of the story wrong?

What if Klavier didn't disguise himself as Apollo? What if Apollo is disguising himself as Klavier, and it's the same Klavier in this trial today said Phoenix.

So the German accent was fooling us into thinking the opposite was true! It all makes sense now, Phoenix! Apollo, we finally found you! Take off your disguise said Athena.

So you're saying I'm actually Apollo, who was disguising himself as Klavier, who was disguising himself as Edgeworth? Do I look like a master of disguise to you said Klavier.

The disguise as Edgeworth was only a red herring as to your true identity, Apollo! Take off the mask said Phoenix. Take off the mask? Fine, I'll take off the fucking mask!

I'll take the fucking mask right off my goddamn face said Klavier. Klavier took his fingers and dug them into the skin on his face. He started to slowly rip the skin off his face.

After the skin was all off, blood was all over the prosecution's seat and the floor. AAAAAAAAAAAAAGAAAAAGAAGGGGAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH screamed Klavier.

DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A FUCKING MASK TO YOU screamed Klavier. Jesus, get some fucking bandages for this retard said Trucy. Trucy got some bandages for Klavier's face.

Oh. He's not Apollo, then. Can't believe Klavier ripped his own face off to prove that he was right said Phoenix. That solves one mystery. But there is another said Athena.

Yeah, where is the real Edgeworth if this one was a fake, pondered Phoenix. Edgeworth was in the lobby getting some food from the vending machine.

Nigga, I'm gonna get me some fucking doritos said Edgeworth. Fine said Godot. Edgeworth put the money in the machine and pressed the doritos button.

Yes, yes. Come to papa. Come to daddy said Edgeworth. The doritos were about to drop, but they got stuck. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS! WHAT A RIPOFF said Edgeworth.

Dude, that sucks man said Godot. YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW HOW I FEEL RIGHT NOW GODOT said Edgeworth. Jeez dude, calm the fuck down dawg. Chill out said Godot.

Then some bailiffs came. Get back in the fucking courtroom you stupid fucking shitheads or we'll fire bullets into your stupid fucking prosecutor asses said the bailiffs.

Fiiiiiiiiine said Edgeworth and Godot as they were handcuffed and dragged back into the courtroom. Dude is that Edgeworth and Godot said Blackquill. Lol noobs said Payne.

Fucking scrubs got their asses fucking owned and noobed said Payne. Then some bailiffs came into the gallery. Get over here said the bailiffs as they handcuffed the two.

The four prosecutors were brought back to the defendant's seat, where they were handcuffed and chained to the seat.

Oh, finally. There you four faggots are. What took you cunts so fucking long to get here said Phoenix. Dude, we were doing some shit in the court gallery and shit said Godot.

The fuck happened in that goddamn trial? That shit was fucking boring and retarded and gay! It sucked dick said Edgeworth. There was a fake you, Klavier in disguise.

We exposed Klavier and he ripped his face off said Athena. Seems legit said Blackquill. Damn nigga, he does look kinda meaty! What a fucking HUNK said Payne.

The judge stopped injecting some meth to see the defendants come back. Hey, lol! The defendants came to the fucking trial! Nigger ass faggot cunts gay said the judge.

Excuse me, Your Honor said Edgeworth. What in the name of Jesus Christ is it this time said the judge.

How much did the Holo cost? A whole lotta cost said Edgeworth. Oh my GOD LOL THAT IS SO FUCKING FUNNY said Payne. Fucking shut the fuck up you cunt said the judge.

No more anti-Semitic jokes in the court. Please, have some decency, you're the ones on trial right now said the judge.

But did the Jews choose to become Jews? mused Godot. Orange Jews or apple Jews said Blackquill. Your fucking jokes suck ass, nobody likes your racist humor said Phoenix.

Racist humor is so tasteless. So are sex jokes said Athena. OMG LOL! YOU SAID PENIS said Payne. Shut up before I slap your ass like I beat my dick at night said Edgeworth.

OH MY GOD MY FACE! MY FUCKING FACE! IT BURNS said Klavier as his face was bandaged up. Dude, you didn't need to rip your fucking face off. Dumbass retard said Trucy.

So what. The defendants are back in the courtroom. I'm not Apollo. I ripped my fucking face off. None of this changes the facts of this case said Klavier.

Indeed. We have two concrete witnesses, Seymour Kuntz and Dick Gumshoe. Both have concrete evidence that the prosecutors were the murderers at Walmart said Trucy.

Excuse me, Dick Gumshoe is anything but concrete said Phoenix. He was fired a while ago, then thrown in prison. He shouldn't have even been here said Athena.

Oh, shut the fuck up. At least you have no other fucking fakers to latch your pathetic excuse of a defense onto said the judge.

No fakers, huh said Athena. What is it, Athena. If we can't come up with one more thing, the prosecutors are going to be found guilty said Phoenix.

Oh, it's something, all right. We still have our trump card, Phoenix. The hair said Athena. But that belongs to the judge. He isn't even relevant to this trial said Phoenix.

He isn't, huh? Go along with my plan anyway. There is one more faker we can expose said Athena. And who may this additional faker be said Trucy.

It's YOU said Athena as she pointed at somebody. It was the judge. Excuse me, what? I have no idea why the shit that fucking bitch is pointing at me said the judge.

You're the faker said Athena. Faker? I'm fucking real, you stupid ass cunt said the judge. Yeah, the fuck is this banana bitch talking about? You make no sense said Klavier.

I have a few questions for His Honor, shut up. First of all, when was the last time you shaved said Athena. I don't remember, you think I have a fucking clear memory?

I can't even remember what underwear I put on today. Was probably yesterday's pair said the judge. Yuck, nasty. I didn't need to know that shit said Phoenix.

Well, we found some of your hair in the court parking lot! You're bald, so this must be your beard hair said Athena. I don't know what the fuck that is said the judge.

Are you sure that wasn't just from some other old fuck said Trucy. No, we had this analyzed. It belongs to His Honor. Get the facts straight said Phoenix.

Additionally, His Honor seemed quite on the prosecution's side today. More than usual. In fact, he seemed to pay much more attention to the trial than usual said Athena.

He straight up threatened the prosecution once they started making offensive jokes said Athena.

His Honor also referred to the exact amount of years he was judging earlier. 70, in fact. However, he cannot remember the pair of underwear he put on today said Phoenix.

This is all pointless! Any more accusation and I will hold all of you in contempt! This is my final warning said the judge.

Please. If Klavier Gavin can peel his face off, so can you. I want to see you rip your own flesh off before denying any accusation said Phoenix.

There will be no more face peeling in my courtroom said the judge. Goddamn it, we have nothing! He's just going to deny anything we say about him! FUCK! said Phoenix.

Wait a minute said Athena. There's a fire extinguisher right there. Grab it and pull the trigger said Athena. Fine, bitch said Phoenix. He picked up the extinguisher and pulled.

Explosives detonated at the ceiling of the court. The courtroom rumbled due to all the damage, causing the ceiling to collapse in on itself and fall into the room.

A piece of debris fell right onto the judge. OH SHIT said the judge as he was knocked to the ground. The walls around the court gallery caved in from the damage earlier.

Goddamn it! This fucking rock just tore into my mask said the judge. He took off his mask. Wait, what. WHAAAAAAAAAAT said Phoenix and Athena once they saw who it was.

It was Detective Bobby Fulbright. Motherfucker! FUCK! Those stupid fucking prosecutors always get away with EVERYTHING! It all was according to our fucking plan!

And you two had to go and RUIN IT said Fulbright. Fulbright, the jig is up. This entire trial really was rigged, wasn't it said Phoenix.

They're still guilty! Guilty! GUILTY said Trucy. You can't declare them guilty, Detective. You are a detective, not a judge. You have no authority in this courtroom said Athena.

I can't declare them guilty, you're right. I can't declare them innocent, either! Ninjas! Waste them, leave nothing behind! Kill them all! said Fulbright.

Ninjas came out of the shadows and started shooting shurikens at the defense attorneys and prosecutors. Let's get the fuck out of here said Klavier and Trucy.

Oh shit said Phoenix and Athena as they tried to dodge shurikens. The prosecutors were rather helpless. Nigga, let's get these handcuffs off said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth got in front of a ninja, who shot a shuriken at him. He moved in such a way so the shuriken cut into his handcuffs, freeing him.

He got the shuriken and freed the other prosecutors with it. Bailiffs were shooting at the ninjas, but they were getting massacred. Blackquill! Your samurai sword, use it!

Payne threw Blackquill's sword to him. Finally said Blackquill as he started to cut into the ninjas. Let's get the fuck out of here said the prosecutors as they left.

Hey, guys! You niggas just going to leave our asses hanging said Phoenix. Phoenix, let's get the fuck out of here said Athena as the two of them left as well.

Meanwhile, in the prison, another secret meeting between Fagslayer, Gluteus, and Maximus was taking place.

I see we all have the advantage right now. Now is the perfect time to strike. Gluteus, get the map. Maximus, get a ride. We will find that man, no matter how long it takes.

Fagslayer pounded on the prison table. Yes, mein Fuehrer said Gluteus as he left. Dawg, we're gonna get those fucking niggers good said Maximus.

To be continued.


	16. The Party Gang

The Cool Power Prosecutors 2: Part 16: The Buttsex Party Gang

The three guys were still meeting in the prison. My homies, we got a problem, said Maximus. Shit! We're still in prison said Gluteus. I just remembered that said Fagslayer.

How are we going to escape prison said Maximus. Wait. I remember now. I have a spoon on me said Gluteus. Why the fuck do you have a spoon on you said Maximus.

Some fucking asshole hoarded a spoon from the cafeteria and snuck it into the showers. When I wasn't looking, he shoved that fucking spoon up my asshole said Gluteus.

So you got raped with a spoon. That's fucking gay said Fagslayer. Shut up you old ass faggot. What are you saying, retard said Maximus.

I'm saying to use the spoon to dig a tunnel out of prison like they do in movies, said Gluteus. You do it. I'm not using your ass spoon said Maximus. Fine cunt said Gluteus.

Gluteus started to dig a tunnel in his and Maximus's cell. Once you're done digging out, I have a plan. The two of you meet in my house after you're done said Fagslayer.

Fine, faggot said Maximus as he went back to his cell. Finally, I can get my revenge on those retarded ass faggots said Fagslayer.

After the trial was over, the courtroom started to collapse. Oh shit OH SHIT said everyone who got away as the courtroom fell apart. As it fell apart, it also started to explode.

The entire courthouse exploded, sending debris flying everywhere and killing everyone still inside. At least nobody important was in that courthouse said Edgeworth.

The prosecutors retreated to a convenient tank they left at the courthouse. Let's get the fuck out of here said Godot as they loaded in the tank and got out of there.

Dude, why the fuck did that courthouse blow itself like the nukes we dropped said Blackquill. Nigga, we loaded the entire place with explosives. They blew up said Edgeworth.

Seems legit said Payne as he started to smoke some crack. Damn nigga, this crack hits harder when you haven't gotten any for like a fucking week said Payne.

Damn right said Godot as he started to do a line of coffee grains. Edgeworth was driving the tank and shooting at random people he didn't like. Take that fags said Edgeworth.

Meanwhile, in the prison, Seymour Dix was walking out of the prison when he saw two men dig out of the prison. What the fuck is going on here said Dix.

OH SHIT said Gluteus and Maximus as they dug out of the prison and ran away from Dix. GET THE FUCK BACK HERE said Dix as he chased them.

Quick! USE THE SPOON said Maximus. Gluteus threw the spoon at Dix, right in his eye, causing him to collapse. FUCK! MY FUCKING EYE! YOU STUPID ASS JEWS said Dix.

Fuck! Fuck! Goddamn it, at least we got away. Where the fuck is Fagslayer's house said Maximus. I know where it is, let's hijack a bus to get there said Gluteus.

Actually, I know where to get a ride said Maximus. The two of them went to the ghetto. All we gotta do is rob a random nigger and steal its car said Maximus.

Good idea said Gluteus. Maximus found a nigger and stabbed him in the eye with his razor sharp nails. Good thing I sharpened those nails so I could kill people said Maximus.

The two of them stole the car. Fuck, you got any disinfectant? Not going to drive a nigger car without cleaning out the nigger germs said Gluteus.

I got some bleach. So I could drink it if I felt like killing myself said Maximus. He bleached the insides of the nigger car.

Gluteus hit the gas and went to Fagslayer's house. Move out the fucking way, you fucking faggots said Maximus to random black people on the road. Retards said Maximus.

They were all run over and murdered by Gluteus, spraying black guts all over the road. There's fucking Fagslayer's house. What does that nigger want with us said Gluteus.

The two of them stopped at Fagslayer's house. There you two faggots are. What took your asses so fucking long said Fagslayer at the door.

Homie, we had to dig all that fucking way, you ungrateful ass fag said Maximus. What the fuck do you want with our asses said Gluteus. Come in first, retards said Fagslayer.

The three of them went inside to plan. I need the two of you to listen up first. I'll give you some crack so you can smoke it said Fagslayer as he left to go get some crack.

Meanwhile, the defense attorneys arrived back at the Wright Anything Agency. Goddamn it! GODDAMN IT said Phoenix. What the fuck's wrong, we won the trial said Athena.

Athena, Apollo's still fucking missing! We never found that retarded cunt! What if he's been assassinated or something said Phoenix. Let's smoke some weed first said Athena.

The two of them got blunts and started 420 blazing it. Phoenix, what the shit should we do? We need to find Apollo or else I'll fucking kill myself said Athena.

And Trucy too said Phoenix. What a bitch! You gave her everything and raised her, and her ungrateful bitch ass had to fucking betray you said Athena who was getting stoned.

I know right, ungrateful cunt ass whore said Phoenix. Then he heard a knock at the door. OH MY GOD, WHO THE FUCK COULD IT BE? I'M HIGH RIGHT NOW said Phoenix.

He opened the door. It was a package. Goddamn it, it better be something good said Phoenix.

What the shit was that said Athena as she got another blunt. It's a package said Phoenix. Get a knife to open that motherfucker said Athena. Phoenix got out an Xacto knife.

I bet you want to cut yourself with that knife said Athena. Phoenix started to cut himself. Damn that feels so good said Phoenix. Then he cut into the package to open it.

What is this? Some fucking drugs said Phoenix. There's a letter in it too said Athena. What could be in this thing? It better not be asking us to do something said Phoenix.

He opened the letter. Dear Phoenix Wrong and Athena Shits, I humbly request you come to this address to have an entertaining party. I congratulate you for the trial today.

There will be rewards, good food, and games there. As the cool kids say, be there or be square. Signed, Felix Agslayer said Phoenix as he read off the letter.

Who is this Felix Agslayer guy? Sounds like a gay ass name said Athena. But there's going to be rewards for us. We need that recognition, Athena said Phoenix.

Fine, you stupid retard. If this goes to shit, we're never going to another party again, you stupid Jewish ass faggot said Athena. Fine, bitch. Stop being a bitch said Phoenix.

Meanwhile, the prosecutors had gotten to the prosecutor's office. Finally, we got here said Godot. Then a package was airdropped onto Edgeworth's face.

Oh my GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS said Edgeworth. It's for the prosecutor's office. Let's crack open that shit like I crack open yo momma's ass said Blackquill.

Dear Miles Fuckworth, Simon Niggerquill, Winstoenail Pain, and Coffee Man, I humbly request you come to this address to have an entertaining party. I congratulate you for

being found innocent today. There will be rewards, good food, and games there. As the cool kids say, be there or be square. Signed, Felix Agslayer said Edgeworth.

Dude, we gotta go to this party. There will be bitches, drugs, like fucking hot ass bitches and some crack said Blackquill as he injected some more meth into his bloodstream.

Nigga, get back in dat tank. We're going to find some motherfucking hoes said Godot. The four of them got in the tank and left.

Homie, we've been here for hours. What is all this party shit for said Maximus at Fagslayer's house. Just wait for the guests to roll in said Fagslayer.

Some guests knocked on the door and were let in. Come on in said Fagslayer. About ten more people came in afterwards.

He opened the door. There were the prosecutors. Come on in said Fagslayer. You look like a gay ass old man. You better not rape my ass while I'm not looking said Edgeworth.

Man, I want that old wrinkly cock right into my asshole so fucking BAD said Payne. Fucking gay ass faggot said Blackquill. The prosecutors came into the party.

Excuse me, what. This is the gayest party I've ever seen said Godot as he saw the party. There was some dip and some party games. Pin the tail on the donkey said Godot.

Oh, I want to pin the tail on these kids' donkeys, if you know what I mean said Payne. Fucking pin the tail, then. Fag said Edgeworth as Payne left to "pin" some little boys.

Dude, I've had doper parties when I was fucking eight. Those birthday parties had more bitches in them than this gay shit. Just old people and stupid kids said Edgeworth.

What's a party without strippers, drugs? Like a DJ or some shit said Blackquill. All we got is this fucking chips and dip. Who even eats that shit said Blackquill.

Let me try that dip said Edgeworth as he tried the dip. Holy shit, that fucking sucks ass. Fortunately for us, I got myself a secret ingredient said Edgeworth.

What is it, homie said Blackquill. Edgeworth got out a little bottle. It's just some cyanide. I'm gonna sprinkle a tiny bit into the dip to give it some punch said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth started to dump cyanide into the dip. Yeah, get it all in there. You wanna really taste the cyanide said Edgeworth.

Damn homie, that is some KILLER dip said Godot. Breathtakingly delicious said Blackquill. Oh, some victims are coming by. I wanna see them get rekt said Edgeworth.

Some kids came by. Oh, get some of that dip said Godot. Blackquill thought the little girl over there was kinda hot, so he started to grope her ass.

Some of the kids ate some dip. Damn, is that shit good said Edgeworth. They immediately got on the floor and spasmed until they were dead. I take that as a yes said Godot.

The attorneys got into the party. Oh my god, there's just a bunch of old people and moms and fucking stupid ass kids said Phoenix. Where's the bathroom here said Athena.

Athena went to look for the bathroom. Damn, I fucking hate this stupid party said Phoenix. Felix Agslayer came by. Agslayer, is it? This party is kinda lame said Phoenix.

Excuse me, Mr. Wright. You haven't seen my colleague yet. Boy, does that man know how to shake his ass said Agslayer.

Meanwhile, Payne was about to molest some little boys. Hey, Payne. Get over here said a man in the shadows. Damn nigga, what you want? I was gonna fuck said Payne.

Let's just say that I'm going to insert my shaft into your body, penetrating your little ass. When I'm done, I'm going to release all the fluid inside of you said the man.

OH MY GOD YES! FUCK ME LIKE MY DADDY DOES said Payne. Close your eyes said the man. He got out a syringe as Payne closed his eyes. Payne was injected afterwards.

Oh damn! That felt GOOD! Man, I feel like fucking falling asleep or some shit said Payne as he was knocked out.

Meanwhile, the other prosecutors were killing kids. Dude, this is still boring as shit. We need to liven up this fucking party said Godot.

Nigga, I got an idea said Edgeworth. We can get some strippers, drugs, some alcohol, a fucking DJ and some other shit. Like, a fucking real party said Edgeworth.

Dude, that sounds dope as shit. Dawg, let's get our party on said Blackquill. Edgeworth left to get some shit. Nigga, he's gone said Godot.

Excuse me, what are you dumbasses doing said another man. And who the fuck may you be said Blackquill. I'm George Luteus, you stupid shits said Luteus.

What a fucking gay name. You sound like a gay ass faggot said Godot. Nigga, we're just going to liven up the party a bit said Blackquill. Fine, niggers said Luteus.

But if the cops come here, I'm lynching your stupid asses and hanging them on my wall with the other niggers said Luteus. Fine, you old ass fucking Jew said Blackquill.

Luteus left. Nigga, I just realized. These old people and kids are going to ruin our fun. We need to do something about them said Godot. Oh, it'll be easy Godot said Blackquill.

Blackquill got out his samurai sword. All we gotta do is cut them down. I'm going for the old fucks, you murder the kids. Rape the girls too, they're hot said Blackquill.

Fine, faggot. Let's fucking destroy these faggots said Godot as he took a hit of some meth.

Payne awoke. He was tied up in chains to the wall in a dungeon. Damn, I kinda like these chains. I just can't resist the feeling of a man taking advantage of me said Payne.

I just want some hot guy to come over here and abuse me like my daddy used to back when I was five said Payne. The man came in.

Dude, I want you to fuck me RIGHT NOW! In these chains said Payne. No, you stupid fucking faggot said the man. Who the fuck are you said Payne.

I'm Murphy Aximus. I have a few questions for your stupid faggot ass. You better comply, or I'll have to resort to physical punishment said Aximus. Yes DADDY said Payne.

I got a whip, if you fucking say more shit I'm gonna fucking whip your ass like I whip my slaves said Aximus. Whip me HARDER daddy said Payne. He was whipped hard.

I have a question for you, Winston Payne. Have you, by chance, heard of the tale of your ancestor, Dixon Payne said Aximus. Fuck no, you stupid nigger said Payne.

Payne's interrogator told him the story of Dixon Payne like in chapter 13. Oh my GOD! If I was him, I'd smack that ass like fucking nigga! Damn that ASS said Payne.

Whatever, Winston Payne In My Ass. What I want to know is your secret. I know that you and your brother know it said Aximus.

Nigga, I ain't know shit said Payne. He was slapped. Slap me harder daddy! Beat me said Payne. Oh my god, how do you make everything sound sexual said Aximus.

Aximus got out an assault rifle. If you don't stop being fucking gay, I'm blowing your brains out. No more gay sex for you said Aximus.

Damn! It's kinda hot how you're aiming the long, hard part right at my face said Payne. I'm going to shoot my damn load all over your face if you don't shut up said Aximus.

Your load? Give it to me, daddy said Payne. Give it to you? GIVE IT TO YOU? I'll fucking give it to you! I'll shoot you in the fucking head! Is THAT what you want said Aximus.

Have you gotten anything out of this nigger yet said Luteus who just came into the room. Dude, I fucking hate this stupid ass faggot said Aximus.

I'll handle this. Give me the gun. I know how to make faggots like this cunt talk said Luteus. Aximus gave him the gun.

Meanwhile, Edgeworth had come back with the bitches and shit. Dudes, I got the shit said Edgeworth. The other prosecutors were done slaughtering children and old people.

Godot and Blackquill came back with blood all over their bodies. Edgeworth, get the shit set up. We've taken out the fucking losers dragging this party down said Blackquill.

The three of them got the strippers, the drugs, some teenagers, a DJ, some strobe lights, and other shit to make the party doper.

Damn nigga, this shit hits like my hands hit on the bitches I fuck every single day said Godot. Then they saw a guy run past them. Excuse me, homie said Edgeworth.

Get the fuck back here said the prosecutors. OH SHIT said the guy. They chased him through Agslayer's house. He ran down there said Blackquill.

The three of him followed him. Excuse me, what is this place said Edgeworth. They were underneath Agslayer's house.

Welcome to the club, homies said the guy they were chasing. Who the fuck are you said Godot. I'm Seymour Dix said Dix. Seymour Dix? The prison warden said Blackquill.

Yeah. I was fired after I let two inmates escape the prison, so my ass came back to this pimpin' place. Dawg, this place is the SHIT said Dix.

What is this place said Edgeworth. Nigga, it's the Buttsex Party Club, dawg. And we're the Buttsex Party Gang. Get some fucking meth and party with our asses said Dix.

Nigga, aight. I can vibe with this said Edgeworth as the four of them went to party in the Buttsex Party Club.

Meanwhile, in Agslayer's house, Phoenix was getting high on his meth when a drug dealer from the party came to him. Dawg, you want some meth said the drug dealer.

Fix me UP with dat shit said Phoenix as he got high on more meth. Damn, this party is fucking kickass now. Drug dealers selling drugs to high schoolers and shit said Phoenix.

Damn, where is that fucking stupid bitch Athena at. Probably getting her face fucked and ass rammed with cum said Phoenix.

Athena was going to the bathroom to do drugs. I can't fucking stand this shit! I have to have some meth RIGHT NOW said Athena as she was suffering from withdrawal.

Athena did some meth in the bathroom. She was so high that she eventually passed out on top of the toilet. Some guys found her on the toilet.

Oh damn, this must be one of the fucking strippers. I'll fuck that hard ass, please, while you pound her cunt like the fucking hound dog you are, Jason said the guy.

Damn I can fuck that hot ass all day said the other guy and the third dude as they started to rape Athena's unconscious body.

Meanwhile, Payne was still chained up, this time being interrogated by Luteus. Cut the fucking shit, Payne. I know that you can reproduce with other men said Luteus.

Nigga, I want to be impregnated so bad by a fucking dude. I just want my stomach to inflate and a baby to come out of my ass! OH DADDY IMPREGNATE ME said Payne.

Please kill me said Aximus. Does Gaspen know about this family secret said Luteus. Dawg, I don't know what you're talking about. I just want to fuck hot men said Payne.

If you don't tell the fucking secret, I'll kill you and I'll kill your entire fucking family. I'll take all the hot men away forever so you can't have gay sex anymore said Luteus.

WAIT NO! I WANT TO FUCK HOT DUDES said Payne. Speaking of hot dudes, do you perhaps know of the tale of Darren Sexxgod? It's a closely kept secret said Luteus.

TELL US ABOUT SEXXGOD OR WE'LL FUCKING KILL YOU said Aximus.

Meanwhile, the prosecutors were joining the Buttsex Party Gang. Nigga, we gonna fuck bitches and waste some niggers? I wanna get pussy and rape ass said Edgeworth.

Not so fast. I have a question for you fucking fags. Have you heard of the escaped convicts? They escaped prison earlier today said Dix.

Nigga, that sounds gay and retarded as shit. They're probably in this gay ass party, getting their gay on said Blackquill who was really high on weed, meth, and crack.

Dudes, let's get some hot bitches. I know a place we can fuck hot hoes and get cunts destroyed said Dix. Dude, that sounds dope as shit said Godot who was also high.

Take a crack break first, homies. I'm too fucking high right now to want to fuck cunts said Blackquill. The gang took a crack break.

Nigga, do you got a dope ride? I'm thinking something bangin' for a fucking gang of fucking bitch fuckers said Dix.

I got the dopest shit. Let's get the fuck out of this gay ass ghetto first and then we can fucking waste hoes and niggers said Edgeworth. Seems legit said Seymour Dix.

Agslayer was watching the party. What IS THIS SHIT? They're fucking RUINING MY PARTY! No! No naked women, or stupid Jewish music, or these seizure lights said Agslayer.

Then he heard sirens and cop cars outside his door. It must have been all that shit they added to my party! Those fags are getting me arrested said Agslayer.

The cops busted the door down. PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR AND GET THE FUCK ON THE FLOOR said the cops who were fully armed and aiming assault rifles at people.

Oh. SHIT. said everyone as the cops started to open fire into the crowd. FUCK said Agslayer as he ran back to the dungeon.

I SAID TELL US ABOUT SEXXGOD! WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT FUCKING FAGGOT said Aximus. Agslayer came in. The police have been informed! said Agslayer.

OH SHIT said the other two. What should we do about this stupid ass fag? He hasn't told us anything yet said Luteus. We'll bag it and take it with us said Agslayer.

Nigga, the only bag I want is your fucking nutsack in my mouth said Payne. Payne's mouth was tied up, arousing him even further. He's so fucking gay said Aximus.

The three of them tied up Payne and hauled him out. Fuck fuck fuck FUCK said Agslayer. Get him in the fucking car we stole said Luteus as they hauled him away.

Meanwhile, Phoenix had seen the cops shooting. Fuck! I gotta get Athena before she gets mistaken for one of those whores said Phoenix.

He went to the bathroom, dodging bullets on his way there. Athena! There you are said Phoenix as he saw her. Goddamn it, what happened said Athena who woke up.

What is with all this cum on your body? Were you raped by some fucking perverted ass dudes said Phoenix. They fucking RAPED MY FUCKING ASS said Athena.

Then some gunshots came through the door. Let's get the fuck out of here first. Cops are shooting at everyone said Phoenix. The two of them left the bathroom.

The Buttsex Party Gang was exiting the club when they saw the gunshots. Oh. Shit said Godot. What the fuck should we do? The cops are gonna kill our asses said Blackquill.

Wait a minute. I have an idea said Edgeworth. He saw one of Agslayer's suits on the wall and put one on.

Officers! I am Felix Agslayer, lay those assault rifles on the floor said Edgeworth as he was wearing Agslayer's suit. Are you Felix Agslayer said the cops.

Oh, no! Let us not get to formalities so soon! Let us engage in some activities of merriment beforehand! Please, I implore you to indulge in some nourishment said Edgeworth.

He gestured towards the chips and dip, which had a lot of dead bodies around it. I suggest all you kind officers to take one chip and a large helping of dip said Edgeworth.

The cops all got a chip and some dip. On the count of three, all you officers eat your chips in one bite said Edgeworth.

One, two, three. The cops all ate their chips and immediately fell to the floor, dead. Yes, NIGGA! Eat my fucking nuts, you stupid ass pigs! Eat my nutsack! said Edgeworth.

The rest of the gang came out. Dude, that was baller! Gimme some more play, gangsta said Godot. You fucking killed all the cops? How the fuck did you do that said Dix.

I just have a natural gift said Edgeworth. Homie, we gotta get out of here and fuck some bitches said Blackquill. The gang left the house.

Wait, where's our pimpin' ride, homie? said Dix. Dawg, we got you covered. Behold our fucking massive ass tank said Edgeworth.

WHERE DID YOU GET A FUCKING TANK FROM? YOU CAN'T HAVE THE FUCKING DOUGH TO BUY ONE OF THOSE NIGGAS said Dix. Dude, we just steal that shit said Blackquill.

Goddamn it. We can blast some black niggers on our way there. You all get in. Nameless guys and Dix said Edgeworth. They all got into the tank.

As Edgeworth was about to leave, a car sped past them. Wait a minute, that's Agslayer! After that fucking fag said Blackquill. Godot manned the gun on top of the tank.

It's YOU! You're the one who RUINED MY PARTY said Agslayer. Who the fuck are you said Godot. I'm Fagslayer! I mean Agslayer said Agslayer.

Fagslayer! I want to slay some fags! Like you! You're fags said Godot. He shot at Agslayer. I got this said Luteus as he jumped in front of the bullet.

The bullet didn't kill him. WHAT THE SHIT said Godot. I'm wearing a bulletproof vest, you stupid ass fag said Luteus. He got out an assault rifle and shot at Godot.

Shit said Godot. Dude, what are you doing, Gluteus. You gotta aim at the tank treads said Aximus. He started to shoot at the tank treads. Fucking ass said Godot.

Godot got back in the tank. Niggas, he's going to shoot out the tank treads said Godot. Aximus got out his sniper rifle and made the shot at the treads.

Get REKT said Aximus. The treads broke and the tank ground to a halt. Fuck! FUCK! I can't move this shit anywhere at all! said Blackquill as the tank was stopped.

So long, retards said Agslayer, Luteus, and Aximus as they drove away from the Buttsex Party Gang. Are you fucking serious! FUCKING GODDAMN IT said the gang members.

Phoenix and Athena were about to leave, when they saw a portal. Excuse me, what does this do said Phoenix. He felt himself being gravitated towards the portal.

OH SHIT said Phoenix. Athena tried to hold his hand to keep him from being sucked in, but she got sucked into the portal as well.

To be continued.


End file.
